CWMI, I'm fully supportive of spouses giving advice to each other. I think that we should. However, do you think in that moment he was just looking to talk?" I'm referring to the "is this how you'd want to be treated (responded? I forget the actual wording of you response to him. Now I have no idea the conversation so maybe he did want advice. But I'm just thinking about how a lot of times wives talk about their day or situations and the guy trys to start giving advice/solving the problem/etc and the wife just wants the husband to listen.

But I do think you're right that people should be honest 99.99999% of the time...even when that truth is when you tell me you hate my shirt. JK JK JK. I didn't say 100% because I still believe in letting my younger kids think there's a Santa Clause smile Does lying about Santa Clause count as being dishonest?

You know, CWMI, I used to have a lot of the actions your husband does. I would put off telling my wife about a situation until the last second that I knew she might not like so I wouldn�t have to hear her gripe. And, you know, it�s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission (as the saying goes). I would omit information to avoid conflict and then do the �oh! I forgot�.� Then she�d get upset and I�d get mad that she was mad and then we�d all yell at each other and have one big unhappy afternoon. Now, I don�t know if this is applicable to you or not but my wife would freak out when she heard something she didn�t like. She was very quick to fly off the handle and so I knew anytime I had news she wouldn�t like, she�d start getting very loud and disrespectful and so I�d put things off not to get the reaction.

That was years ago and I�m eternally grateful that I have learned that �honesty is the best policy� in all cases�specially dealing with my wife. I decided that regardless of how a person will respond, it should not dictate whether I�m honest or not. I won�t lie and say it wasn�t a relief and made it easier when she stopped having her AOs. But for her to quit having AOs I had to be very honest about how I wouldn�t tolerate her behavior. Anyway, I have no idea if any of that helps you at all or if I just rambled on for no reason . lol

Husband (me) 39
Wife 36
Daughter 21
Daughter 19
Son 14
Daughter 10
Son 8 (autistic)