Telly, listen, hon...I have never gone to anyone else without speaking with H first. No, he didn't agree to me telling other people how I felt. I'm not going to sit here and allow my H to not care how I feel and say NOTHING to others involved. He has his chance to handle it.

Honestly, what you are saying to me sounds an awful lot like telling a BW that unless her H agrees to exposure, she shouldn't do it. As far as I have been able to determine, I'm not a BW--the inappropriate emails were not personal from that girl, they were forwarded jokes. But again, I've been blocked access to a lot of contact that I could have been given access to. Inappropriate emails + future blocked access through deception of possibility = suspicious.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)