In the book Dr. Harley states that the Renter relationship can't be sustained for long, because the taker comes out eventually and ruins things. That's why I thought the question was pertinent to the discussion of the book.

I suppose it depends on the nature of the two people involved i.e. how long it takes them to get their takers out, but was wondering if there was a recommended timeline where you wouldn't have to find that out, well assuming that you both become buyers at the time of the marriage.

I'm not interested in dating again.. hurts my head to think about it... besides I still have a marriage I am hoping to save. But in terms of advising others. I wouldn't have minded getting married at 21 (5 yrs dating) if our parents had been supportive. Water under the bridge, but I wondered for if I had to advise younger couples.

Me BW: 30
WH: 33