Originally Posted By: Srw
If anyone would be so kind as to help me figure out how to implement Plan A in my situation...

...I'm just very concerned as you guys say Plan A is so shaky when not done right, what do you think would happen if I played it "cool" like this, she went out, possibly Has a continued affair or numerous one nighters, and I weather the pain and still show her love until she sees me in the Air Force finally, making good money, looking good and feeling good, and decides she wants to become a real wife and the "party is over"? I'm afraid if this does drag on 5-6 more months then it will be almost impossible to pull her out of that depraved ditch she is in, that she simply won't want to try. She would have to initiate the divorce though, as I will not participate. I just don't see her doing that if I'm making these efforts for her, though time can change so much, especially spending every day the next half a year, apart. Even with the plans to see each other in the "future", it can be out if sight out of mind for her now.



A few thoughts

1. You can't Plan A in your sitch. You know that analogy of throwing rocks in a stream you mentioned? You are throwing rocks in the ATLANTIC OCEAN. I'm a submariner, trust me it's deep. What you are trying may work, but it's no plan A.

2. She MAY come around. Many of these "geo-bachelors" stop their whorish behavior when they finally look at themseves and say "what have I become?", or more likely they get caught by their husband/wife. She MAY get to that point after a few ONS or not. She MAY fall "in love" with another guy showering her attention then you are out of the picture completely within six months. If your plan is to stick this out, deal with the pain, put on a happy face, move there someday, test her for STDs, and (ultimately fail to) recover your marriage, I feel for you. I can tell from your writing, you are better then that. She blocks her husband from social media? I would take what you've learned, file for D, join the AF, find a woman who loves you and will actually live with you, and work on a life of happiness meeting eachothers ENs. That's me though.

3. Military logistics make NO guarantees that you will actually end up stationed with her. You say a half a year. It may be much longer. Consider that.


Me: BH, 36 Military Officer
FWS: 36, repeat offender
Married: Valentine's Day 1998
DD-15/ DS-10
Almost recovered and ahead of schedule