Originally Posted By: Pepperband
POJA = "a rule for thoughtfulness"

I like concepts taken down to the basic level, that's why MB works for me.
Both logical and basic.

You ask your spouse: "What would you think about me doing (this or that) ?"

If your spouse says: "I would not like that."

If you go ahead and do it anyway , you're being thoughtless.

Simple.

I think you definitely need two people that are both signed up for the POJA theory to get the most out of this. Honesty needs to be key for the person responding. If the spouse really doesn't like the idea/action, they need to respond honestly.