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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664 |
I have not been initiating any calls to WH, unless it's about the kids, or the house, etc. He usually calls me every morning, or every other morning and I've only been seeing him about once a week or so. It's so hard to plan A when you see them so rarely! Also, the in between times get SO long and frustrating. I'm trying to do the 180, by being pleasant and not lb'ing, i really wish he would move back home so I could really put the plan to work!
KK
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,649
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,649 |
being patient is the hardest thing to do.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 2,236
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 2,236 |
kk2002,<p>Please go back and re-read about Plan A, it is for your to grow and become a better person, it really has nothing to do with WS, you are not doing it for them or to them. If you have the opportunity to share some of the new things that you have learned or show some new behaviours when you WS is around that is a plus.<p>But Plan A is for you and your growth.<p>Dawn [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664 |
Thanks for your replies.
I just want things to happen NOW!
KK
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 3,454 |
kk ~ <p>I did it for 18 months - communication was by brief phone call - sometimes days at a time went by.<p>I saw him roughly every 2 weeks - sometimes I saw him a few times a week, sometimes it was much longer.<p>Just go with the flow and always put your best face forward.<p>Give him lots to think about when he isnt' around.
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 3,661
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Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 3,661 |
kk, there's a couple of pluses in your favor here: He is not around withdrawing from YOUR love bank <p>and<p>You are not always having to walk on egg-shells avoiding LB's.<p>Just remember that when you DO have contact, use those grand oppurtunities to demonstrate any changes you've made. No LB's, and meet as many needs as possible (admiration, conversation, etc.)<p>How about a heart-felt card every now and then? A funny e-mail? An admiring look and smile when you see him? You don't want to smother him with this stuff, but do things he'll miss when/if you switch to Plan B. Sort of like dating... you're on your best behavior (not fake though)... but not being a pest.<p>my 2 cents [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664
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Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 664 |
Thanks Faith1,
The kids and I are going out of the country for a week, so maybe I'll send a few postcards.
This is all starting to make a lot of sense.
Thanks for the encouragement.
KK
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 2,236
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 2,236 |
kk<p>You've been given some very good suggestions, I'm glad that you are getting it!! I do hope you go and read too!!<p>Dawn [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]
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