I am very sad today...I really feel like a fool for wanting my WH back..Last night, I got some very bad news about a death of someone I new and was very hurt..I needed to talk to someone, so of course, I called the WS...I was crying when I called to tell him what happen..he in return tried to offer a little support that really did not sound sincere..but on top of that I notice that he was not along...he kept telling me to put my mind on something else and go to sleep..really just trying to rush me off the phone..when I asked him did he have company, he hesitated and said that wasn't my concern..that hurts..anyway, I want to know if I am kidding myself or wasting my time, should I keep trying to restore this marriage?

Real sorry about the friends death. I hope you are O.K.

All of us BS's feel down from time to time. Just do not try to make decisions now. Let the pain of your friend's death fade before thinking about what to do with the marriage.

Just remember the A will die. You have more chance at your M then your WH has at his R with OW.

God Bless.

Thanks, I really needed some encouraging words..you know, when you marry someone, you tend that they will be there in times of sorrow, but I guess that's not true..so I need to put all my false expectations under the bridge and face facts, no matter how bad it hurts..

Tatchina,

Sorry for what you are going through. Maybe this will help.

Throughout my 14 year relationship with my H I have been there for him through everything......the death of his best friend, his grandmother, a terrible accident that almost cost him his left foot....I waited on him hand and foot for 8 months while he was healing....and never complained.....I did all this because I loved him.

My H has NEVER been there for me when I've needed him to be.

He wasn't there for me when I needed someone after finding out about his A......he wasn't there for me when I was in the hospital.....he wasn't there for me when my mother became ill and hospitalized and I couldn't go and see her not knowing if she would recover or not.

I hold NONE of this aganst my H. WHY?

Because at the time of all of this.....my H was going through his own hell....he couldn't help himself and therefore couldn't help me.

It's not that your H is unwilling to be there for you. It may simply be that he isn't ABLE to be there for you at this time.

Thanks, Miss Priss..That gave me some hope...I know that I too would be there for myWH in time of need, and I know he also knows that..but I suppose that his thinking is messed up right now anyway, therefore I really shouldn't take anything he does or say personally...Thanks again..