<small>[ August 16, 2002, 09:34 PM: Message edited by: Spacecase ]</small>

Aw, forget it! Two feet in mouth is too much! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" />

Hmmmm...

That's ok hcii. You might not want anyone to know that I am your Sis!!!!
(Ooops, the cat is out of the bag now.)

After all, I tend to be the colossal pita that posts simply because I am the "no nonsense" kinda girl. Guess I am just a tad intolerant...huh? That must come from having been in a 1st marriage that literally drained me of all self worth and then deciding (and finding)that my second would NEVER be like that. As life would have it, my 2nd marriage ended with the unexpected death of my husband. Now I find myself in a "committed" relationship that rivals my 2nd marriage. I am one lucky person!

P.S. Even on my brother's WORST day I would be proud to claim him as my brother. We are so close that a mere 17 months separates us in age.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I actually got worried that something had happend when I saw several new pages.

Hey, you guys are better than the Sunday funnies anyday!!

Dirt eater, LOL!!!

Hi everyone:

What a great turn this thread has taken! Humor is the best medicine. Some day I am going to have to get me some of that humor stuff.

I hope you all have a fantastic weekend.

Jack

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> That's ok hcii. You might not want anyone to know that I am your Sis!!!!
(Ooops, the cat is out of the bag now.)

P.S. Even on my brother's WORST day I would be proud to claim him as my brother. We are so close that a mere 17 months separates us in age.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well.....Making me cry, again.

She knows good and well that I would not have made it through this without her.

She's got this knack of being very objective. Shoots straight from the hip, yet could always converse with me in the "opposite", and caused me to think, think, think.

Yet the ONLY thing she wants, is for me to be happy.

Enough of this.

We now return you to the saga of "Affairs that don't end...2B...or not 2B?

HCII

Good morning! Glad everyone's enjoying this!

I'm headed out to fix my W's pc, so I'm sure I'll have some new stuff later on.

Good luck, SC, on your "mission."

Me? I'm not eating any mud today. Just regluing an old dresser. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

"an old dresser"

QUIT talkin' 'bout me being unglued 2Longamudeater.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

We're about to head out to see

"My Big Fat Greek Wedding"

Tell Falafel I'll let him know how it is!

Pepper <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

My WW is Greek. 1st Generation.
(Very cute!)

I really want to see that movie.
Please tell me if it would be good for me and WW to see together!

Thanks!

ST

You kidding?

All WSs are Greek to me!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

spacecase, hopefully while you're fixing her computer, you could give her a labotomy (sp??)

I loved "My big fat greek wedding", just came from the movies from watching it. I laughed a lot and it was cute.

Despite the guy I have always had a crush in is on it, since I saw him in Northern Exposure I've liked him <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

It made me a bit sad at parts because of the whole wedding-love stuff. I never got to even have a proper engagement not even a ring, and my wedding sucked because my xWH didn't really care about it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> , but I tried to get over it and enjoy anyways. He kept trying to hold my hand but I just wasn't being too receptive. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" />

Hmmm, I see Pepper came unglued, 2L didn't eat any mud today, and he discovered WSs are "Greek" (HELLOOOO!), ST's WW IS Greek, for some odd reason GC thinks I'm a brain surgeon (although I'd sure like to give the lobotomy a try with my tool-set...hmmm, intriguing thought!), and ALW has a crush on an actor...Busy Day!!!

Well, so I made it to "my" house around noon, and I had a lot of trouble reconstructing my WW's pc...it all started off fine, smooth, but when I installed NAV, it would NOT run LiveUpdate! It just kept saying that LU had been uninstalled! Very bizzare...so after a few tries, I gave up and reformatted the whole disk, and started from scratch. Everything went without a hitch, and I finished about 1/2 a hour ago, so it was a full 11+ hours! JEEZ!!!

Nothing really happened all day, we didn't talk too much, watched a few movies while trying to get the pc running, she made me lunch and coffe several times, but no attempt at any serious conversation all day.

She was, of course, almost asleep by the time I got up to leave (11:30 or so), and she was very, very thankful, hugged me and kissed me, and I just kinda acted a little cool, did give her a peck back and told her it was my pleasure, ... I went in her room and said goodbye to my D, and started down the stairs. My W stood by the rail and I stopped, turned to her and said "Well, you should probably think about some other ways of getting these things done, since it's a bit difficult for me while I'm not living here.", she opened her eyes (quick wake-up) and said "I'm sorry, what was that?", so I said "I think you should be thinking about some other ways of getting all these things I do for you done, because it's a little difficult for me to do them when I'm not living here." she just stared at me, not angry, just kinda' floored I guess...I stared right back for a few seconds, made SURE I didn't blink, and headed down the stairs and out. She didn't say another word.

And that's about it. We shall see how and if she'll react to that. I guarantee you I ruined her sleep tonight, wondering what I meant by that....

oohh, if you floored her that much, maybe you should go check on her , there may be a heap at the bottom of the stairs, kidding.

good for you for telling her that, shows that you won't be convenient and available for her and her beck and call!!

Yeah, I think it's one more "clue" in a string of clues that have been coming at her since the day I left...perhaps as we build towards the full Plan B, she'll reconsider having that "talk" she'd told Steve she was ready to have with me.

The "Radical Honesty and Evidence" talk Steve said she needed...

But time is running out...next call w/Steve is Monday 9AM...and during that she'll either have to be VERY convincing that she's ready to go, or it's full Plan B...we shall see. I'm certainly NOT very willing to "wait it out" until she decides something.

John Corbett is my all time crush. *sighs and gets all teeny-dreamy*

Just don't tell my husband or he'll tease me about it forever LOL.

Oh yeah, and I agree, you floored her good. Well she may be getting the clues better now. I am glad you have the opportunity to talk with SH about plan B go o no go.

You did wonderfully! Man that was cool!

<small>[ August 18, 2002, 02:25 AM: Message edited by: Alostwife ]</small>

Dear Spacecase,

I've been following your thread as best I can, when I can get on the computer - its just soo..sooo..what can I say - you are just doing great...you know what you want - you love your wife and want your marriage, a REAL marriage back - I am just so amazed that you are doing this without LBing - that was such an act of love to fix her computer - but walk away from her like that.

I don't think you could have done better.

You posted a note on my thread last week and I haven't been able to reply - you said you were glad that it looked like my H and I were starting to improve on communication, and you were sad that you didn't seem to have been able to reach that point with your W.

I just want to say that I don't think any improvement with my H would be happening had I not started to put plan B into effect back at Easter. I had genuinely reached my limit - I did not have a plan carefully worked out, as you do (even better - much better - spontaneous plan B is not a good idea financially) - but I had definitely reached my limit with his behaviour. I communicated my desire for him to leave over a period of a week, with a series of short, calm, conversations. I was not ruffled by his anger or his excuses because I knew what I wanted and was ready to walk and live with it. I said what I had to say and walked away. It was only over the course of a week, when he realized that my feelings were not changing from day to day, that he realized that I meant what I said. I saw the fear on his face and in his eyes grow as the week went on. He did not stop seeing or talking to OW during this time, but he began to realize that this was not a game and the cost of his fun was going to be very very high. At the end of that week, I told him I still loved him and wanted us to work out, but that it was either me or her. Period. So I did let him know that I did still love him. I believe that it was a slow process, this waking up - but at the end of the week, he had admitted that "he had a problem" and he had got himself into individual counselling. As you know, it has been a rocky 6 months from then, and we still have yet to get to MC, and I still do not have the kind of actions I need to be fully confident that he will be "faithful" in the future.

What I am saying is that I don't think we would even be as far along as we are, had I not made it clear to him that he cease his behaviour or it was plan B. I think his IC is finally starting to bear fruit - just my intuition. I feel we are finally starting to recover some of the love we had for each other, and respect for each other's feelings.

But it took starting to go to plan B before he realized he was going to have to handle his problems before it was too late. I hope and pray that your wife will realize soon that she needs to pull her finger out soon and start to get to work. Until she does, you must not waver - she will be looking to see how determined you are. You are in such good hands with SH - I think he is right about not giving her mixed messages - much as you might want to be more affectionate, it is better to stay more distant right now - better for you, too. Will be praying for you both.

Take care,
LIR

Thanks LIR; glad you had time to come by!

I appreciate your encouragement; it's good to hear from others that were doing well, sometimes we doubt so much...

One question: do you think that there was a gradual change in your communications w/WH as he began to show honesty and to work on the M?

Sometimes I feel like I should, by now, have been able to have a lot more to talk about with my W, but I still feel so guarded, since I still distrust so much, and especially because she has not been honest and forthcoming about her feelings, the truth, etc.

You think I'll start feeling differently as she begins to open up? (If she does).

<small>[ August 18, 2002, 03:57 AM: Message edited by: Spacecase ]</small>