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It just really sucks sometimes you know!!!!! I hate feeling like I have been used and taken advantage of, it just burns to much!!!! Just can't go any further tonight!!!! Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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daybreak...are you OK. Just checking on you.
<small>[ September 01, 2002, 12:07 AM: Message edited by: cajunky ]</small>
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Que ? ... anything happen ?.
{{{{(((HUG)))}}}}
-RH-
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[[[[[dawn]]]]]
sorry you are having such a hard time... thanks for posting to my update... I know reading 'good' news can be difficult when feeling bad...
Prayers,
Cali
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Hey guys I appreciate the thoughts, I am fine!!!! Just mad and I haven't gotten that way many times through this journey, just one of those nights. Divorce papers didn't come, so again I am having to do with less money then when I will be divorced. I asked for more $$$ as I needed help with school supplies and activites expenses. Nothin, notta, went around and around with STBX on the phone tonight. Says there is no money available, he is moved in with a friend so she can live in his apartment. But he is paying the rent on his apartment. Always her first and not his kids, just makes me see RED!!!! And I just let it get the better of me tonight, I guess. I am just so tired of paycheck to paycheck, I haven't nor will I ask for any financial support from my parents, they give me all the emotional support that I need and that is enough, I am not their responsibility nor are their grandchildren, that responsibilty still belongs to my STBX as his lawyer misplaced the paperwork again for a week, (I thought that that was my Lawyers job!!!) Anyways I am fine, just confused!! How can some one be so blaza(SP) about the children? Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> (see it is still a smiley face!!!!)
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OH no Cali, reading your good news made me smile real big!!! You had so many more tough things last summer then what I ever did!!! I have never had this person in my face as you did, I've never seen this person and that may be even harder, I guess!!! She was in the room tonight and made her presence known. I still admired Hurricane Cali in many ways!!!! You take care and never not post good news!!! We all need to know that although we did not make it to recovery that others have and we are happy and praise the Lord for that!!! Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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I'm glad you can feel that way...
but, I consider you to be a 'success' to... you haven't taken this lying down... so-to-speak...
You have kept on... doing what you had to do to make it... and I admire that...
...as I feel that Faith1, WAT, etc... are successes too...
Hugs...
Cali
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Thanks Cali, I am a success!!! And I am making it in life and I recovered myelf!! I just went through a surgery that will allow me to lose 125-130 pounds in the next year which will put me where I was 22 years ago when I first meet STBX!!! I had problems losing the weight all of those years, and I think I was scared too, I had been the party girl before marriage and stopped once we were married. And somehow in my head I thought that If I was skinny I would fall back into the party girl mode and didn't think that was what a wife and mother should be!! But on the other hand I liked myself even fat and was afraid I would lose that person if I lost the weight. So through this last year I have worked through that, I can still like the person that I am and I can be healthier and live longer!! So yes I have succeed in many ways thru this process!!! Thanks though, I like and need the encouragement from time to time!!! Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <small>[ September 01, 2002, 01:13 AM: Message edited by: daybreak ]</small>
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I guess the other thing that really burns me through this, that some may understand.......... Emails are sent back and forth, requests are made or items needing agreement are sent. STBX will answer right away at times and then others always seems to be on big items, he'll take his sweet time getting back, I have to and I mean have to wonder is he having second thoughts, why can't he just take care of business. I have stopped letting myself fall into hoping. But sometimes it's hard, somehow I had gotten it in my head that she got feed up with the waiting process and he took her back to FL. So in a lot of ways I am mad at myself for allowing my mind to wander to such things!!! I am trying hard to work thru this tonight before I go to bed!!! I have been told my C that Ihave to let go and stop caring, it's so hard at times, and when it involves the kids and it hurts, I just can't keep my mouth shut!!! Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
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Hi Dawn,
I am so sorry you had a rough night! I hope today is better for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers. HUGS to you Dawn!
BH
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