What do you do if you are in Plan A and you know the A is still going on but you cannot prove it easily (PA or EA - not sure). There are occasional cell phone records showing contact but WS erases them anyway. The fact that WS does this is proof of hiding evidence. How do I get it out in the open again?

However, I don't want to give away one of my only conclusive sources of information.

1. you can find another source to gather your info. Friend, relative, pet, children, etc.

2. hire a pi

3. install tracking software on the computer.

4. install a hidden voice activated tape recorder in her car.

5. install a hidden camera in the house or car.

6. set a trap - plan to be away or appear that you will be away.

7. insinuate you know something but don't make it too extravagant.

8. do a search on OP.

9. plant a few questionable items......
a. hm.....what is this sore on you or me?!?!
b. your clothes smell funny....what is that smell?

10. Ask RedHat about the 'test'......

Is that enough?

Thanks Orchid. There are some good ideas there and I have tried all of the ones I can already (it is amazing how creative we can become in times of need). I have since found more than enough circumstantial evidence to suggest that the full PA is occurring. There are so many signs that there is only one likely explanation that ties them altogether. It also matches WS unusual behavior patterns (I have the benefit of hindsight of her behavior before D-Day).

The PA is still going and I have to live with it. I am now just trying to pull up WS every time there is an inconsistancy without repremanding - just letting her know that I am aware and not impressed.

Do you have any idea what their pattern of meeting is? Where they met? If so start checking out those places when you feel she is with him.

Do you think she uses your home phone to call talk to him when you are not at home? YOu could put a taping device on your phone line. They are cheap..... check out radio shack. They have one that goes between the wall back and the phone. It also connects to a tape recorder. Turns on every time the phone is picked up.

Another thing people have done is to hide a voice activated recorder in the WS's car. put adhesive backed velcro on the bottom of the car seat and the back of the recorder. That was you can velcro the recorder in place and it will not slide out on a quick stop. I know of a few affairs this has revealed.

I realize that you might not feel good about doing this stuff, but you do have the right to protect yourself.