I've basically made a mess of Plan A/Plan B and I'm wondering what my next move should be if R is my goal. Here's how I've screwed things up.
11/01 WW has ongoing affair with OM, I ask her to move out and she does. She has to scramble to find a place, I think it was very scary for her. I get a PI that confirms her A with OM at her new apartment.
12/01 I tell her about the PI, get a attorney and file on grounds on A. She agrees to go to MC.
2/01 After several sessions with MC, she says it's not helping, won't go anymore. MC tells me we were close to getting somewhere, I agree.
4/01 I suggest we settle out of court. We start working on settlement of equity, stocks, etc.
6/01 She tells me she's not sure she wants D. We go out on a couple of dates, I push for R too hard. Tell her she needs to quit job because of OM being present, she refuses.
8/01 She indicates that there's no chance for R, says she's confused but can't come home. It becomes apparent that she's under some financial strain, as she has to split house payment and pay for a nice apartment. I tell her to not worry about helping with house payment even though I can't afford it.
9/01 I start Plan A, we have some good conversations, she starts to open up again.
11/01 OM quits job, moves out of state. I LB, make her feel guilty for everything. I make final change to agreement, and am expecting her to sign it. After we both sign, the only thing left is a short hearing where it becomes final.
I've been inconsistent and have gone back and forth with going through with D and holding out for R. I can see now that this inconsistency has been a major LB. I feel like now I need to keep my work and sign the agreement but I still love her and want a shot at working through this together. We've been together for 13 years so this is tough...I feel better now that I've vented.
