Any input on this situation is appreciated -

BACKGROUND
I am the BS
WH has lived away from home for several years, though we are not separated officially.

HERE'S THE DILEMA -

I am part of a sailing race crew that races each Wednesday evening. A few weeks ago, there was a storm that rolled in so we didn't sail. We sat around the tables on the patio and talked and one by one the crew left till it was me and a male crew member (our team is co-ed).

A man I knew from Church (who also knows WH but doesn't know about WH) sat down at the table next to us. I said hello & we talked for a few minutes. Shortly after that the male crew member & I got up to go & I felt a strange look from the man I knew from church. I thought " OMG, he probably thinks I am having an A!" (I am not) That was too ironic! I am not the one having the A & this guy thinks that I am! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Then last night in church I saw him (WH was there - first time in this church in a long, long time) and this man acted different! I felt terrible. I wanted to call him up and tell him that I am not having an A. Then I thought he may think I am just trying to cover it up.

My mind is all over the place on this one. Any thoughts? I don't know if I should say anything or not ???

Any help is greatly appreciated,

D.

<small>[ July 07, 2003, 11:32 AM: Message edited by: WillGetThruThis ]</small>

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
take a deep breath and keep your chin high, don't change your life if you haven't anything to be ashamed of or to hide. why do you care what this person thinks? is he suspicious in nature? you haven't done anything wrong, so don't act like you have.
keep the faith and lots of hugs

Dear Wgtt,

Of course people will wonder. Your H has lived apart from you for how long?

How to handle? Let them wonder. Then later straight up introduce the 2. Or even casually mention that about the crew, then say 'you might remember the group you saw me with? Our whole crew decided to have a brief meeting and the last one had to pay the tab. I made sure it wasn't me - LOL!!' Then let it go.

IMHo and runnaway imagination. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

L.

IMHO I would just mention the irony of the situation to your H, if he would be able to see the humor in it (I do not know your situation) or mention the incident to him.
I mean your H's reaction/thoughts are the only ones you need to be concerned with.
It has taken me a long time, and I am not completely there yet, to see that what others think is not important, just you knowing you are ok and any other person it may affect (in this case being your H) is aware/ok with it, that is all that matters.
Sorry, this may be a little sharp in tone...I had a rough day with some "friends" and impressions, and it is late.
NGU

Are you sure this isn't largely your imagination? So the guy looks at you and has a thought. Probably in the next minute he went back to thinking about himself, as most people do.

I'd blow it away. And if your H has a thought about it, after several years of separation, he shouldn't be surprised. You haven't agreed to take the veil, have you? Did he think you would abjure male company of all kinds forever? If he wonders, let him ask.

Never complain, never explain.