Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum
This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at
mbrestored@gmail.com
|
|
|
|
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 234
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 234 |
If your H or W had an affair with a married OP more than a year ago, and that affair is over with (and has been for over a year) would you tell the OP's H/W? I just did that, I wrote him a letter telling him that what he thought was just a friendship was a PA.
I have two reasons for doing it, one is revenge, I don't want her to just get away with it. The other is that he has as much right to know as I do.
I don't know how he will respond or if he will even believe me, but I did what I should have done a long time ago.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 163
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 163 |
I guess it would depend on how far into recovery you are, If my m was fully recovered I wouldn't, however if I felt there was a chance of the A starting up again, I certainly would.JMHO.
I did not expose my H affair because he ended it the day he told me about it, we are now 28 months past D.day and other than his anger issues are pretty much recovered from the affair.
How do you think your W will respond when you tell her? I hope it dosen't set you guys back in recovery.
Best wishes
mtheart
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060 |
Did your H write a NC letter?
A NC letter is always the best way to accomplish three things at once -
1) communicate together (WS and BS) to the OP that the affair is over, was wrong, and you're rebuilding your marriage instead,
2) inform the OP's spouse of the affair, if he/she doesn't already know and its ending, and
3) for the WS to apologize to both of them.
JMHO
WAT
<small>[ June 02, 2004, 07:32 AM: Message edited by: worthatry ]</small>
|
|
|
|
0 members (),
725
guests, and
68
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
Forums67
Topics133,624
Posts2,323,518
Members72,026
| |
Most Online6,102
Jul 3rd, 2025
|
|
|
|
|
|
