I started having contractions yesterday and went to the hospital. My friend called WH and he stated he was having a softball game and would call afterward. When they finally stopped the contractions and sent me home I called. Someone was holding his phone while he played and answered. He called me back and I let him have it. I told him that if it wasn't important I wouldn't even bother calling next time.
He was very apoligetic and told me it wouldn't happen again. He didn't know it was serious.
I think he is so far removed he has no clue. He is so caught up in his life with OW. He is helping her move into her new house (after her D) this week.
I am on drugs to keep me from contracting.
Pray that I don't have this baby early for me. I need to atleast make it 4 more weeks (37).

Oh no! I had problems during my first pregnancy and had to stay on bed rest. Please, please try to forget WH and take care of you and baby.

I think of you so often. I have changed my name (CoolDuck).
I think your H is an idiot. Sorry, I can't believe that he is behaving this way.
Please focus only on you and your baby. You must try to let some of this stress go. It is not healthy. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I know God with look out for both of you. Take care
CD

Durham,

((((hugs)))). Been following your posts. IMHO your WH can't face what he has done/is doing, so it's easier to stay in fog land. Don't worry, he'll face it sooner or later. In the meantime, you need to relax and take care of you and the baby. It's your first birth, so there will be more false labors and when the real one comes there will still be lead time to call him (if you want him there). Leave that responsibility to some one else!! Have someone else make the call last minute. You concentrate on having a safe and happy birth.

PS. I loved the child birth experience (well, maybe not at the vey moment). But a split second later and your whole life feels like heaven. Look forward to that moment.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by durham76:
<strong> He called me back and I let him have it. I told him that if it wasn't important I wouldn't even bother calling next time.
He was very apoligetic and told me it wouldn't happen again. He didn't know it was serious.
I think he is so far removed he has no clue.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hey durham, I don't know what plan you are in, but disrespectful judgments and angry outbursts only hurt YOU and make the OW look more attractive. You are supposed to helping yourself, not her.

Oh Durham, I'm so sorry about the scare and that "dippy' (my new name for him) is still ticking you off.

Just go get a whole bunch of movies, books and things to eat, and then rest, rest, rest.

Don't think about Dippy anymore...just you and baby okay?

Weaver

This is why you should stay in Plan B. You keep wanting something that he's not going to give. You can't change him; you can only change the way you do business.

<small>[ July 02, 2004, 01:15 PM: Message edited by: A.M.Martin ]</small>

durham,

just wanted to add my support here. you remain in my prayers. 4 weeks is not that much longer, try to stay relaxed and focus on that baby!! but it is not quite time to meet him/her yet, so tell that baby to stay put!!!

love to you,

Karen

Durham - I have been thinking about you this week. Hang in there. I know you are just trying to do what you think is right. I mean what normal person wouldn't want to know when his child was being born? You know in your heart that you have done all that you can and no matter what you should have absolutely no regrets. You are a good person trying to make the best of a horrible situation. Now it is just about you and baby, someday he will regret his actions but that is not your problem.

Take care of yourself and try to get some rest. Pretty soon all the pain and heartache will be replaced with the love for your new baby.

Thanks for all of the support. It is so difficult to not stress but I keep very busy with friends and family. I am never home.
I think dealing with the visitation has been difficult. He is dragging his feet. He asks me what the big rush is for him to file. Can't we do it after the baby is born. Unfortunately no as I need to protect myself and don't want to deal with it with a newborn.
He is just a coward. It is easier to say you want a D then to actually do it.

You betcha it is.

durham - Please take care of you and little one. Your H is deeply in the fog. How could anyone think that a softball game was more important than early labor? That is just sick.

WH is not in his right mind right now. You need to be strong (I know, you are tired), and take care of YOU.

You are close enough to full-term, that every day counts. Please be good to yourself.

Dear Durham,

I pray for the health of your son in the womb.

What events occurred before the contractions started? My daughter was having therapy on a back injury, and after a session of muscle relaxing therapy, she began contractions, a couple months early. Like you, she went to the hospital, and they stopped the contractions with medication. My daughter stopped the physical therapy for her back injury which occurred in a car accident. My daughter never had early contractions again.

If you can identify anything to avoid, that might have brought on hte contraction, that might be constructive.

Does your lawyer still feel you have a strong position? Are ther case preparation activities that would make your case stronger? Will your lawyer make the prepaarations without a fee right now? What fees would he charge for what preparation?

Blessings!

I am in survival plan that focuses on me and my baby as much as possible. My WH will be stopping by to discuss visitation hours so that his attorney can look at them. After that he needs to file for D and then visitation is set. The rest of the D will begin after I deliver.
When he sees me and has to deal with his old life he is very sad and apoligetic then I think he goes off with OW and steps into the fog.
I think when his son is born it will be extremely difficult to just forget about me and his son and have a great time with OW. I can't wait to rain on his parade.

Durham - I know what you mean. Everyone tells me that everything will be different when the baby gets here. WH even wrote in an e-mail that one of his co-workers told him he would not be able to leave me once he saw me with his child. I'm not sure why he felt the need to share this with me.

Even through all this heartache you must be so excited to finally meet your baby. My cousin, who has a 6 month old, keeps telling me she can't even begin to describe the love she felt for her baby the second she saw him.

durham - Deep breaths - you need to take care of you and little one. Hope you are.

I met with WH today to finalize custody agreement. He is going to see his attorney on Wednesday and I think he will file.
The meeting was very strange. It was just like a business meeting with a stranger. He did ask me how I was doing and if I needed anything at all. He told me to have a good day and thanked me for meeting with him.
I am at the point where it doesn't really bother me to see him which is good since he will be visiting our son after delivery.
I feel good about the road ahead with or without my WH. He will be the one missing out on my beautiful childs life not I.
He is so deep in the fog and is helping OW move into her new home. He took the week off to help her.

This is rotten, durham, but you know that already. Protect yourself from him as much as possible. Stay close to family and friends.

Durham,

You were the plan B pro. Get back there. You and your baby need you to rid all of the clutter out of your life.

Then, you will know, see, touch and experience what real, true, unconditional love really means. The birth of your baby will do this, and it will rock your world. I cannot wait to read your post in celebration and acknowledgement of this fact! I am praying for you!