One more thing. Is there a reason that I shouldn't tell my family and my inlaws the truth about this breakup? My mother in law, father in law and sister in law knew about the first A with OW. H will try to make it look like OW is not in the picture and is not involved at all in his leaving and the breakup of our marriage. He is already lying to his father about her, flat out denying that he is still seeing her when his father asks him point blank. He knows H is lying because I called him and told him what was going on the very first night I found out - my father in law was instrumental in saving our marriage after the first A, and told me to call him if my H ever slipped up again - he has been very supportive all through this second go-round, and we have also discussed the fact that I understand that H is his son, he will always love him no matter what, that he does not have a "conflict of interest" with my confiding in him.
Anyway - it appears that with this first blatant lie that H will try to make it look like we split up for other reasons. (and he has never said anything about the age issue to his father throughout the marriage and throughout this latest crisis). Then after a respectable amount of time, he will introduce OW as his new significant other, like they hooked up after both of their marriages split up, nothing was going on before. Even though H's whole family knew about the A the first time and who this woman is.
Same thing with my family. He told my mother that he wants to "play the field" and that my age was a factor. I think he is embarrassed, ashamed whatever, about OW being the catalyst and that he plans to be with her. But more than embarrassed, I think it is part of their elaborate plan to make things as easy as possible for her to be accepted into the family by trying to make it look like she has nothing to do with this situation, which is totally a lie. And my kids,
are they suppose to think that Daddy is shallow enough to leave Mommy because for some vague reasons of us not getting along? (we do). When he starts to bring her into the picture with them, am I just suppose to let them think she had nothing to do with the breakup?
Opinions, please.
