I know I usually come on here in an unhappy state. Today I thought I'd try something a little different. I just wanted to thank everyone for all the help they've given me. I really appreciate the advice I've recieved here on this site.

I know I'm not the poster person for MB principles but I do try. Lately my will to continue trying has been wavering as my first anniversary approaches and I debate whether to proceed in filing for divorce. Clearly I can't decide if I want to end this marriage or live in a marriage that hardly exists. Truthfully I don't see our relationship recovering. That's why I'm finding it harder to continue here. I don't even know if I like the guy anymore.

Other than that, I'm feeling a lot better about things. I am really greatful to everyone. I hope there was light in your life this past weekend and I'm wishing everyone the best of luck in their marriages and in life whatever direction it's path takes you.

Thanks Ivy. You've come a long way. It's good to hear you're doing well, but don't be in too much of a rush to be "done". It's easier said than, uh, done.

I thought I was doing very well a week ago, then my WW came to the house and it was far more difficult than I imagined. Cry, cry, cry.

Hope work is going well for you. Have you started school again?

GC

Ivy-

I agree with gc. Why are you in a hurry to divorce? Right now your love bank is empty...but things can change (and usually do). Give hope a chance to work inside your WH.

What is he would have given up while you were dating?

2scared

You're right, my love bank is empty. I'm just so confused as to what to do. I just keep wondering why I'm trying to be with someone that I don't even want to even be around most of the time.

If he had given up on me back when we were still dating at least I would have been spared all of this. Besides, I never treated him as he is treating me now. I came back within a week.

I know that really means nothing but oh well, my negativity is sneaking up on me again.

I never treated him as he is treating me now. I came back within a week.

Not a time to keep score, Ivy. I don't want to push you one way or another, I only want to suggest giving yourself plenty of time.

GC

Oh Ivory, that was so sweet. Thank you!!! I'd sit tight for a while if I were you, no rush on the D. You've grown so much in the last few months, it's been a joy (and relief <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> ) to watch actually. There are still a few "basics" to take care of, don't you think?

I think one of the personality characteristics you exhibit, that is your amazing ability to pull yourself together in a VERY short period of time may be now driving you into considering the action of a divorce.

I'd let it rest until you have the health thing, the school thing, and whatever other details crop up settled. You want to make a momentous decision with complete presence of mind in other words, and while I can understand you wanting to be proactive, maybe now is not the time.Hang in there, girl. KB

I know, I'm just sick of feeling like this. I'm tired of putting my life on hold because of this. I'm starting to think that it was a mistake to marry him in the first place.

Why even bother with marriage anyway. It only complicates things. If anything, this whole thing has ruined my views of marriage. After all, you don't need marriage to be committed to someone and getting married doesn't protect you from infidelity or a break in the relationship. I just don't see the point anymore.

Anyway, that's besides the point... I mainly just wanted to wish everyone else a happy weekend and week to come. Everyone has been great here. I know sometimes I'm full of mood swings. Thank you for putting up with my craziness. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Ivory, I've been following your posts. YOU ARE NOT CRAZY! Just young, and hurt and confused. If I were there in reality, I would give you one big hug and make you one of my famous meals. But I can't.
I know that through reading your posts you are a beautiful, strong, and loving young woman. You have a truly peacefull and loving spirit and you are a good soul! You can and will make it through this dark time... with or without your husband. Take care and God Bless and keep You My dear.
P.S. They can only hit you in the chin so much............Then their hand is hurt also!

Even four weeks ago my FWW was spitting out divorce words at me. Trying desperately to scrape money together to leave me. Even considering the kids college fund in her name....being deliberately hateful... I just plan a'ed, detached myself from it and right now, I could be wrong but I think we might just be OK.

God ( using MBs help!) can rescue any relationship.
FWW behaviour developed JUST LIKE MB told me she would. That is, as long as I behaved just as MB said I SHOULD. You should have hope that your WS will conform to the template like most of the others do.

Have hope. Have faith. You can do this.

<small>[ September 27, 2004, 02:29 AM: Message edited by: Bob Pure ]</small>