When does it end? I’ve been, these last few months, trying to adjust to this new situation of being single (feels like “deserted”) I’ve had to fight against depression, for my job, and about my place in my children’s lives. Now the kicker: My supervisor is pressuring me to leave by transferring me to remote site doing a job I’ve never done before, effective immediately. My colleagues and staff knew it was happening for weeks, I just found out. They know the sitch. They know I need this job. They know I’m recovering from depression. And. They. Do. It. Anyway.

Funny thing is my WxW found out and immediately gave me numbers of attorneys to call. Her brother, who funded her divorce from me, wants to help (he’s a lawyer with connections). “You’re brilliant. You’re better than them all.” “You have the mark of greatness on you”, WxW tells me this and hugs me for the first time in 9 months. Why the sympathy? Is it fear? Is it concern that the money will run out? Some say it because she really loves me (A and betrayal, and divorce aside). Please, somebody, let me know what’s up with that.

I’m so tired. My life's continued to tank. I’m always fighting, always on the defense. This year has been so full of loss for me. I hate my life right now. Those who have jammed me (WxW, supervisor, etc.) keep sticking me and tell me it’s for my own good. Well guess what? It’s not good for me! I have no ides how to approach this. This new position is impossible for me to perform (even the logistics of getting there are difficult). I’m meeting with my VP. I hope and pray, I get a break.

<small>[ November 29, 2004, 10:04 AM: Message edited by: dleightonc ]</small>

Hi, d.

I have followed your story here. I am afraid that I don't have any great words of wisdom for you.

If the job they are transferring you to has less responsibility, but pays the same, then you might want to look at it as a chance to slow down and recover a bit. You have certainly walked a hard mile.

As for the seeming kindness from your ex-wife and relatives, it is likely from guilt. I would watch out for anything they offered like it was a sack of rattle snakes. If you accept, you potentially allay their guilt.

If your boss is indeed putting you in a position to fail (common practice in the business world), then make sure that you do the damn level best job that anyone forced into your position has ever done. Be proud of yourself even if they fire you.

I honestly doubt that your lawyer will do much good. I had a company refuse to pay me 5 million that they agreed to pay me for a system that I developed. Maybe you can beat them, but it will likely take years. I am just telling you the truth as I understand it.

Regardless of how any of this turns out, the sun is still going to shine tomorrow. There are other jobs, probably better than the one you have.

Only God knows what is best for you. Most, if not all the others are simply out to make themselves look or feel better. That does not mean that you can't be a better and stronger person regardless.

In fact, if you really want your ex-wife and minions to see what you are really made of, then thrive in the face of adversity. Eyes forward, face of steel - make your way in this world in spite of what has been thrown at you.

There is a better job, and a much better woman waiting for you to get through this bit of refinement by fire.

You have been already been through worse. You will get through this as well.

God Bless,
Gimble