On 11-11-2004 DH has a perscription for Viagra filled. This was much to my amazement because I was not aware of any problems in that area! We have a great sex life and I had never noticed anything. He said it he wanted to try it because the Effexor he is taking is making it harder for him to maintain his erection. But again, there were no obvious problems when we had sex.

Well now there are only 3 tablets in the bottle and I KNOW without a doubt that he did not take them for when we had sex. So of course I automatically think, well who is he taking them for?

On 11-17 DH goes to night class but does not come home until almost 12:30, class lets out at 9:30. He said he had to go to the library to do some research for a paper that was due that week. (Paper really was due, I looked at class schedule).

I noticed the first Viagra was gone somewhere between 11/18 thru 11/22, can't be sure of the exact date. At that time I thought maybe he took one, masturbated to see if there was any difference.

But then this past Monday evening I discovered that 2 more Viagra pills were missing! I looked at the bottle after he called saying that he had to go to the library after work. He was home by 8:30 pm.

Of course I don't want to think that he is doing anything. He is always home, comes home everyday for lunch and I know where he is 99% of the time. He walks to work and I work from home.
But this week I started keeping a log of his activities. He went to class last night but came straight home afterwards. If he was seeing someone, you would have thought he would have used one of the rare oppurtunities that he is out of the house to meet her???

But why would the Viagra be missing? I've checked everywhere thinking he might have put them in a pant or shirt pocket. Could he be masturbating? He says he does not masterbate. Yeah right, I know. I've tried to see if there were any tell tale signs that he is pleasuring himself but there are not any lotion bottles in the bathroom.

I'm staying very quiet and just watching and taking notes.

Should I be concerned?

What did he say when you asked him about it?

Forgot to say that there were originally 6 pills in the bottle. For anyone who has used Viagra do you only take 1 pill at a time?

I have not asked him about it. I did not want to let on that I was suspecting anything...

Why don't you ask him lovingly about having the viagra to begin with, expressing your desire to ensure his sex life (with you) is fulfilling? "Hon, please tell me when things aren't good for you! I want you to be satisfied!" Throw in, "It's always good for me!" if you want and feel this way.

Don't suggest - for now - that you are concerned he's using them with someone else.

WAT

<small>[ December 02, 2004, 02:41 PM: Message edited by: worthatry ]</small>

He knows that I know he has the medicine, I was with him when he picked it up.

Funny thing is the last time we had sex, he lost the erection (first time ever) because he went past the point, got there, held back, got there, held back. We did this for too long. In the past if he did this for too long then it would take a long time for him to finally O. I had to finish him off that night with a hand job. Again, this was the first indication ever to me that he was having any problems. He did not take the medicine that night as I looked at the bottle the next morning.

Well, what was his explanation for getting it?

Are there ANY other things he does that suggest he's having an affair?

WAT

My FWH used Viagra during the early stages of his A, prior to D-Day. He used it in order to have sex daily not because he needed it for an erection.

He had received samples from his physician. No explanation to me. I found them pills missing but denied to myself why he was using it and why the pills were missing.

Just to let you know, I should have taken this as a sign. I think by you being here that you may know more but don't want to admit this to yourself.

Been there-done that.

Keep your eye on him. Don't tell him that you are suspicious yet. I think you need further information.

<small>[ December 02, 2004, 09:30 PM: Message edited by: mimi1254 ]</small>

My H had to start using viagra way back in 1993. . he had become totally impotent. I also noticed that one was missing and when I asked him about it he denied that he took it. . .I know that he didn't take it for me because I always gave him the tablet before we had sex so I knew how many were in the bottle. He swore up hill and down dale that he hadn't taken one. The next day I visited our pharmacy and found that he had collected another prescription for viagra, when I confronted him he swore on a stack a bibles that he had bought it for a friend because he had told the friend how well they worked and the friend was having problems and wanted to try them. I believed him.n Stupid me!!!

That was the start of his four year affair which only ended last year in December. I wish I had been less believing and more vigilant, maybe I could have nipped the affair in the bud right at the beginning. But I trusted my H and never thought he would have an A.

So if I were you I would be extra vigilant and find out exactly who he is using the viagra with. It may save you years of anguish. . .the fact the my H had a four year A with a girl young enough to be his daughter has devastated me and I am only now (a year later) starting to feel slightly normal again. I don't think I will ever be totally normal. . .but a bit slightly normal is better than I was. I was a nut case.