Jimmy Mac, what is this, rewriting history as we've seen so many others do to justify doing what they want to do?
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Jimmy Mac said in the latest post: For the record, what I said was:
"If you [foreverhers] are suggesting that I condone or approve of what he [SOSM] did, then you are an idiot."</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Not what you said, but what you perhaps inadvertantly implied when you posted your first message quoted next;
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Jimmy Mac said in his first post: The response to this guy has been appalling. Nothing has been said here that helps him, the WS or the BS. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Totally dismissing every admonition no matter how "strong or soft" to STOP the adultery immediately. In essence, we are all idiots and Jimmy Mac is the only "sane" one here.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Jimmy Mac said in a subsequent post: Foreverhers:
Get off your friggin' high horse (and turn off your bold key). If you are suggesting that I condone or approve of what he did, then you are an idiot. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Now Jimmy Mac did get around to including me, or singling me out, as being an "idiot." I can just imagine how you "witness" in the real world if that is how you characterize people when you feel "attacked."
So let's be clear Jimmy Mac, you lumped everything that everyone had to say into one basket and declared it "appalling and nothing that would help anyone." Sort of like a bunch of "idiotic statements of no value."
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I take a offense at anyone intimating that I am not 100% against As. My A could have destroyed my marriage, my life, my wife's life and my kid's life. I am fully aware of how close we were to the brink. We were truly blessed.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Of this I am quite sure and in complete agreement.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Since I was a WS/OP, I feel like I understand the OP and WS. I wish I could reach out and talk to each one and convince them to change.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">A very commendable desire, as well as frustrating, because it usually requires a confrontation before someone will begin to face the facts and listen to someone who is trying to tell them to stop.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">When a WS/OP comes here asking for help, they surely have already figured out that "something is wrong." So, there is a great opportunity to do some real ministering.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This is true in some cases, but not in all cases. It was quite evident that SSOM, from his now deleted post, was not interested in ending his affair, just how he could get her away from her husband without having to worry about a violent response. It was totally self-serving and quite "fog laden." Part of the now deleted post was this next quotation:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">SSOM said: I know that she's the woman I've been searching for my whole life. The problem is that she's married, Of course. She is trying to tell her husband that she wants a divorce but when she does, he freaks out and she just puts it off. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He wants her to divorce her husband, take up with him, and the two of them "live happily ever after" with no consequences of the adultery or the harm they are inflicting on the husband.
All we can surmise from what SSOM posted is that the husband might get drunk in order ease his pain and then come looking for SSOM to beat a new tune on his head. Yep. It COULD happen. But as with most OP's and Wayward Spouses, they try to paint the Faithful Spouse as some sort of "monster" in order to "justify" their adulterous behavior. As long as they get what they want, everything is fine.
Jimmy Mac, we have an obvious disgreement about application of biblical passages in this matter. You advocate the "soft and patient" approach in this case. That's fine. But perhaps you might also want to think about the passages in the framework of what Jesus actually did and said. The gentle approach IS needed and the best approach on many occasions. But so, too, is the direct and strong approach when it is obvious someone sees no wrong in their sinful behavior, or is willfully out to hurt someone else just to get "what they want."
Jesus did not "reason" with the folks in the temple. He chased after them and drove them out immediately while telling them that they were sinning against God.
Jesus did not reason with the Woman caught in adultery. He "reasoned" with the crowd, and Mortarman did an excellent job of explaining what was going on in that scene. The simple point that I was making is that Jesus did NOT tell the woman to "taper off, to think about what she was doing, etc." No, Jesus told her in no uncertain terms to "Go and leave her life of sin" immediately. He called her behavior sinful and told her to end it NOW.
Jesus was equally blunt with others when the occasion warranted it, such as with the woman at the Well, a Samaritan. Jesus was about one thing more than anything else anytime he spoke to anyone....it was "obey God," right now, not later.
He cemented this position many times; such as during his temptation by Satan and in his praying in the Garden of Gethsemane. In every case it was always about DOING the Father's will and NOT doing anything that was in opposition to God's will.
So if I seem somewhat strong in my verbage at times, it's partly because this typed medium loses all inflection and tone of speech and partly because it seems appropriate to the moment.
Nevertheless, a "penitant" OP, WS, or anyone you care to classify any way, is welcomed here and help is offered generally in a gentle and patient manner.
But that's not how SSOM appeared. It's not how any of his postings have suggested. He is here, until HE says differently, to figure out how to end this woman's marriage and take her for himself.
To allow that to go "uncommented upon" would be akin to allowing sinful behavior to go unchallenged or admonished in a local body of believers. It would be a potential cancer in their midst. The people who SHOULD be here on MB are the man and his wife, learning about what went wrong and how to recover their marriage, or even how to separate and/or potentially end their marriage if the husband was a violent wife abuser and alcoholic. But certainly not to find out how to let "feelings" control one's behavior or how to steal another man's wife without concern or consequence.
Not always doing it the "right way," but standing for the Lord as best I can.
God bless.
