Hi, Gimble.

Aaagh!!! I'm just as immature as he is!! It's like a compulsion, I just have to get a peek, not that it ever does anything for me but make me sad. Why do I keep doing it? I just feel so forgotten - out of sight, out of mind. How can I be so strong about some things, but so wimpy about this?

Thanks for hating seeing me in pain. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I do want to be strong and do this right, otherwise I'm just wasting my time - and maybe making things worse. I'm pretty stubborn, too, you might have noticed. It's not a quality limited to Bam-Bam, it seems.

This reminds me of one of the kids' favorite quotes from Disney's 'Madagascar': "What is a simple bite on the buttocks among friends?" I'm chuckling, but I'm also listening and getting the point through my dazed skull.

Oh, that cake went in the big trash can outside, where the really smelly and/or rotten trash goes. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Thanks, confused. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I'm sorry things aren't going so great for you right now. I've been following your thread. Stupid aliens.

Disney are using the word 'buttocks' in their movies now? Shocking. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I'm glad you had fun, Pebbles. It's always nice to get some male attention, too (unless the attention comes from the creepy biker dude who lives in the flat downstairs <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> ).

BTW - don't you ever sleep? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Alph.

Hi, Sleepless.

Eeeeewww! That hard to be hard to take.

Yes, I think so, too. There are a lot of lessons to be learned from all of this, even though they are difficult and painful to learn.

What an awful anniversary you had. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> I almost think it was easier having WH gone than dealing with a wayward spouse in the house being cruel and thoughtless.

You're right. He's MOW's stupid boyfriend. I didn't think about starting anniversaries from "1" again. I guess it would be, either with him or someone else.

My kids are amazed when a 'new' song ('80s remake) comes out and I know all the words. Amazed, and slightly embarrassed when I sing along. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I don't think I'm much for the bar scene. It was fun being with my sister and some of her friends, and I really like to dance, but I don't think I'd want to do it every weekend. I'm looking forward to tomorrow when I'll be grilling steak for the kids for dinner, taking the dogs for a walk, then finishing the evening by watching 'Kim Possible' on T.V. I hope it's the mutant weiner dog episode (my favorite!).

"It's too late! My men have unleashed....the dachshunds!"

Hi, Alph.

I know! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> What is this world coming to? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> I used to do a lot of medical transcription. My kids use the proper medical terms for all the parts of the body, LOL. They can locate them on the anatomy chart, too.

Thanks. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I usually get cat-calls from the slimy, hormonal college boys across the street, and the toothless old guys waiting for the bus. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Not much. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

What a choice for you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I have lots of students living around by me. Large, beefy rugby players, mainly. Never cat-call me, tho. *sigh*

Alph.

Sounds like it was a fun nite, Pebbles! I'm glad you at least got got and have some moments of a good time. Doesn't matter if if you still felt the need to cry later on, it was still baby steps forward. That's what I always tell myself when I'm down... Remember to take steps FORWARD!


~A

Sorry for the TJ in advance

Gimble,
I have a plan B question for you that Pebbles may benefit from too. In the context of WS having contact with OP any contact even accidental contact acts as a fix for the alien addict, keeping him addicted. So why is total withdrawl of BS a good thing? I know removing BS from contact hopefully forces a reality check for WS...WS can't blame BS for daily events because they aren't involved in daily life. But the "glimpses" that have been happening with Pebbles...don't they do the same thing keeping him hooked on Pebbles? He's not cake eating because he not enjoying all the wonderful benefits Pebbles has to offer. Or is it that these "glimpses" keep Pebbles hooked as well?

I'd appreciate any clarity you could offer.

Confused...glimpses feed the fix enough that it removes the motivation of the WS to change.

The pain of staying the same has to be greater than the pain of change.

Thanks BR... I see your point I hate limbo. Thanks for the input.

I avoided mutual peeking as much as I could when WH dropped off the kids this evening. He was supposed to bring them home at 6. At 6:15 I called son's cell phone to see when they'd be home. I like how son asked his dad, repeating what I had said to him, "Dad, what time are you going to take us home? Mom needs to know so she can plan her evening." I guess WH assumed I be waiting around with nothing to do until he felt like bringing them home. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Anyway, when the dogs started barking I went to the front door to let the kids in. I looked through the peekhole. WH was following behind the kids with a big plastic bag. I opened the door just a little to let the kids in, then closed and locked it right behind them, standing behind the door the whole time. After I heard his car drive away, I went out and got the bag off the front step.

Daughter got a birthday card from court-buddy brother and MOW-buddy SIL (the now-married affair partners) at WH's lair. I guess the inlaws will be sending things to the kids there now. WH took daughter shopping again, hence the big plastic bag of toys.

Son told me he mentioned to WH that the kids stayed at my parents' house Friday so I could go out. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Very good advice, Ashley. I did have fun going out Friday night. It was hard to see couples together, though. I had to avert my eyes a few times. I guess it will get easier, eventually.

Hi Pebbles, can I join your thread? I'm negligent and lazy and want a synopsis.

I think we have the same anniversary. 7/29?

GC

I was thinking about how WH might feel when he picks up or drops off the kids.

He sees the outside of the house and knows he won't be allowed inside. He sees the front yard, which is being very well maintained without his help. He hears the dogs barking, but doesn't get to pat them or see them wagging their tails with joy to see him. He can't get into the garage to commune with his tools and assorted manly items. He sees life going on without him in the neighborhood. He sees the pile of stuff by the curb for anything-goes trash pickup - heavy items that got to the curb without his assistance, and he had no say in what was thrown away. He gets to carry daughter's things to the door and set them down outside, having the door closed and locked as he stands there.

I wonder how that feels? Maybe he's just too fogged to even care. Maybe he is glad he no longer has the responsibilities associated with his old life. Maybe he can't wait to get back to his lair and call MOW. Maybe it hurts, just a little?

Just musing and rambling.

Hi, graycloud.

The more the merrier! I lurk on your campfire thread from time to time. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> As far as a synopsis, hmmm... It's such a long, long, sordid tale. I'll think.

Yes! We were married 07/29/89. Not such a happy day any more. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

*does a little dance in pebs thread*....sorry I had a little bug ticklin my feet.

Here's a story about bugs, maybe more suited to idiotville.

I'm plastering the walls in one of my bedrooms. I'm almost done. The walls are beautiful: smooth and puuuuure white. I'm using a worklight so I can see my work. The room was getting terribly hot, so I opened all the windows. No screens.

I took a break. It got dark. Hundreds of bugs filled the room. They covered the walls!

Here's where it gets even sillier.

I couldn't kill all these bugs. They'd be splattered all over my perfect walls. I put the light against a spot on the wall, waved a stick around, and sloooowly collected them in a jar and took them outside.

This project took about an hour. A few remain - the ones that refuse to get off the ceiling.

Is this not a marriage building post? Doh.

I was married in '94.

GC

Luckily they didn't get stuck to the walls...although it would be cool...kind of like a jurassic park preserved bug theme.... ok I'll stop talking now.

Hi, Surviving.

I was thinking the same thing (not the stop talking part, the bug part, LOL)!

I'm getting an amusing mental picture of graycloud madly waving a large stick, then sneaking up behind the bugs on tiptoe, little jar in hand. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I can hear them taunting you, "Nah, nah, nah, naaaah, nah!" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Oh, graycloud, I updated my bio. It's kind of a sickly, skeleton synopsis.