It has been quite some time since I've been on this board and I just wanted to send a word of encouragement to those who find themselves on this board for the first time or anyone who is still struggling with trying to save their marriage. My story is very long so I will not go into it except to say it was the most difficult thing in my life to deal with but God helped me through it and so did many on this site. Maybe my old posts are still here somewhere so you can find them to read my story but I just wanted to say hold on to hope, believe and trust in God and he'll get you through this. My huband and I have been in recovery since 8/2003 after he left me for OW and was living at his mothers for about 9 months and then at the second OWs house for another 6 months. I held onto what the word says, did a Plan A, went into a Plan B (while slipping into Plan A) and my husband finally came to his senses. So it will be two years this coming August. It has not been easy but it definietly has been worth it. We don't take each other for granted anymore and we regret greatly what happened to us. I'm happy, we just got back from a vacation alone and God is truly doing an amazing thing in our marriage. I still have those "triggers" sometimes where I think back but I keep remembering Lot's wife in the bible who looked back and became a pillar of salt - lifeless and useless and that's not what I want. I've heard God say to me, look ahead because what I have for you is ahead so that's where I look. If you put your trust in God and you follow the suggestions given in Harley's book, you can restore your marriage. My husband 3 months ago gave me the most beautiful letter he had written for me that he cried as he read to me and it was then that it truly hit me that he's for real about this marriage. So folks, hold on and claim what you want for your marriage and work towards that and trust in God. It'll be quite a rollercoaster but you can make it.

What a great testimony! Thank you for the positive, inspiring feedback. I am in recovery as well. Only 6 months since d-day and we are doing well. You quote at the bottom Jer. 29:11 is my favorite too. I have found that God has got me through this and is showing me his awesome power by changing my H mostly and me too to make this work. God can do all things.

Good luck to you!
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I am so happy for you.

I pray every day for an outcome like this - my husband left me and our two children nearly two months ago and wants to divorce me.

I wish you all the best. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Alphin.

Alphin, I don't know your situation but I will tell you that within the first month of my husband leaving he told me we were over. I still have the e-mail he sent me where he basically told me we could be friends but that he didn't love me as a wife anymore and asked that we both go our separate ways and that we could talk about how we would move forward with our separation and divorce. His words were like a knife in my heart but I told him that I would not receive those words because that was not God's will and I just held on to what I knew God's will was for our marriage according to God's word. When they are in this fog because of the OW they say all kinds of things that make you wonder who the heck they've become. Someone once said on this board it's like they've been abducted by some kind of alien being and that's so true. So keep doing Plan A, no outbursts and just dive into God's word and trust in God, not in yourself or your hubby but in God and watch what God can do when we let him do his thing.

I'll keep you in prayer.

I like your log in name. May God's grace and blessing be upon your recovery.