Mimi is right, she plans on meeting with him in an attempt to get him back. There are no answers he owes her and she knows that.

If she does plan on meeting with him, I would let her know that you and his W will be there also since you have every right to know what is said.

GREAT IDEA, MEL!!!

Try to stop the meeting or say you'll be there....

It's best for them to have NO CONTACT....

Typical. I know it is hard to get used to, but it is what she has to do while she is in the fog.

No...and yes. In reality, it doesnt make sense. Knowing that she is a WS...it absolutely makes sense. This is what they do. And actually, you should be happy she is reading the WS script. Why? Because is she was trying to leave and wasnt foggy...then your marriage would probably be over. The fact the fog still exists, that she bounces back and forth...all is very good for you.

All true, but dont tell her this anymore. For one, then she might change her ways of treating you. And you dont want that. You want to be able to know when she is in contact with him. Or, if she isnt, you want her being nice to you. So, just let it go. She is being who she has to be right now. This too will pass.

Get intel on the meeting. When it happens, advise OMW. Keep shining the light of day on this. Make it VERY painful for the OM everytime he even thinks about your wife.

Keep up the good fight.

In His arms.

Mimi... I think WW looks at this potential meeting as his "official" breakup with her. To get her questions answered. BUT, you are potentially right too. It just depends how mad she is at him, I guess...

Melody: That is an AWESOME idea! I can't image her going for it though. (WW probably won't admit to me that there is an impending meeting.)
Also, I think if the 4 of us got in a room together, there would be violence! Wife is mad at OM. OMW is mad at My WW. I'm mad at OM... If I DO find out when this get-together is supposed to take place, I'll clue in OMW though.

Gramm, don't ask her if she will go for it, TELL HER that you and the OMW plan on attending any meeting she has with the OM. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> And don't tell her how you would know the time or place.

Can you get the OMW to put spyware on her computer? Tell her that they are communicating again.

Gramn,

I'm sorry. This is BULL... When I caught FWH on D-Day at the motel in his boxers, he said, "I'm ending it right now... LAUGHABLE...

You do not have to MEET in order to BREAK-UP....

I totally agree with Mel's idea..

heheehe, that is funny, I missed it, Mimi! WS must be the only creatures in the world who have to continue to contact someone in order to end contact! lol

Gramm, please tell me you don't believe her purpose is to officially end it? If you believe that, we are going to hurt ya! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I believe that she THINKS that OM is going to end it. I don't think WW would end it, and if he's coming for a visit, he's probably looking for something else too...

A new source has told me that OM got a job out of town (about 2 hours drive from here). I'm not sure what his current living arrangment is. Last i knew, he was back with his wife and family. Now, maybe not.

If she thinks he is going to end it, it is her goal to convince him not to end it...

Let her know that it is NOT ACCEPTABLE to you for this so-called GOODBYE to occur...

Y-GUY does not PLAN on ending the A.. He is a cake-eater, wanting to hold on to both your WW and his own wife for as long as possible...

Does his wife know about this?

Zactly right!! This is her intent. She is trying to save the dying affair. This is why you will need to make sure OMW is clued in.

Actually, I have a slightly different call on this. I think you find out when and where the meeting is, you drive by and pick-up OMW...or if she wont come, get out the ole video camera...and then you go there. You walk in, stand right by them for a few seconds as they stare with that stupid "duuuuhhh" look on their face, then turn around and walk out. If you brought the video tape with you, just vodeo for about 20 seconds, turn it off and pack it up, then leave. Dont say a word. Dont get into an altercation. Dont get close enough where there will be an altercation. Make sure you are out in public.

Now, what will this do? First, it will ruin the evening for them. She will be trying to convince Former-Y-Guy to live up to his promises, and all he will see is the guy who lost him his job (when in reality, Former-Y-Guy lost his job himself!!). He will see all the problems at home again that has been caused by this. he will look at this needy, clingy woman asking him to continue this lifestyle forever with him. Where he has to deal with you.

And he is going to reach the point where he says "What are you...nuts? I aint doing this nomo. I have had enough of this craziness. How in the world did I get hooked up with this mess?"

Of course, your wife will be angry. So what? Exposure is always good. Driving a wedge into the affair is ALWAYS good. You could have a letter prepared that you put on her winshield that basically says "I still wait for the chance for us to have the marriage we deserve."

So, do whatever is comfortable to you. But keep in mind the intent of the infidels...and that is to do some more "infidelling." (I know, it isnt a word...it just sounded cool)

In His arms.

That video idea is a good one. That would really creep me out...

This "meeting" couldn't be until Thursday at the SOONEST, and probably not until after that.

I don't know when it will be though. I can alert OMW of course, and see if she knows anything, but up until now, she is not a very useful source for anything. She is good for telling me what her situation is though, which is a good way to pass along the true story to WW.

When WW returns to town late Wednesday, her grandma and great-aunt will be coming to stay with her for a few weeks. I think they know about some of this situation, and I believe, like the rest of her family, they are against this affair. I don't know what they would or wouldn't do to discourage her, but I'm sure they will put a crimp in her "lovelife".

Naahhh. Actually, even though they might be against it, they will probably help her lovelife. Know how? Well, they can watch your little girl while she heads out to meet up with OM. She could even meet him out of town for a day or two. No one would know.

So, dont count on them being a help.

Wait until you have concrete proof of when this meeting is and then let OMW know. If you tell her now, she will confront OM, and he will just deny. And without good proof, you will look crazy to OMW.

Remember, this is YOUR mission. She is only one person involved. She really will not help you much, except as a conduit of pressure on OM. Outside of that, dont count on anything.

So, find out when and where this will be and then show up. As a matter of fact, show up, film it...THEN contact OMW. Believe me, they wont head off to the motel after seeing you film them. OM will be heading home to put out fires!!

In His arms.

Gramm,

I must agree with Mimi..""Sorry, Gramn...it's looking like PLAN B to get this over and done with....""

You must stop pussyfooting around and shock her into reality!! You are participating in her "DRAMA". Get yourself out of it.

You will feel much better and freer without the anxiety.

k

Yes, Gramn.

If you want to catch them, play your cards close on this one.

I predict the plan is for this "GOODBYE" to occur at a motel..with the assistance of her babysitters....

I'll let you guys know when i find out more. I'll have to be careful...

Krusht may be right. But we are a few days away before Plan B guys. He has to get a few more days of Plan A in. After his wife gets back from her trip and settles in, then if she heads off to OM, he goes and gets the proof, contacts OMW...and then goes to Plan B. if he is in Plan B, then there is no longer exposure because he should be having NC with his WW. If this guy is supposedly workign on his marriage, then it will be good to catch them one more time to put pressure on that deal. The OM, after losing his job over this affair, will just be disgusted he ever got involved with Mrs. Gramn because of all the continuing headaches. He wont know when it will ever stop. or if it will stop.

So, Plan A a little longer (days). Get the intel on this meeting. Keep meeting her ENs. Then once you get the intel and expose the new meeting, then you can decide on if it is time for Plan B.

But I do agree...unless somethign radical happens in the next week, Plan B is coming!!

Remember Y GUY can cakeeat more now and can be more out of place with a new job 2 hours away....

I agree with waiting on PLAN B though...

Well see what happens in the next few weeks. I'm thinking about this plan B stuff, but will probably wait until her her grandma and great-aunt leave.

I got a letter from my lawyer last night that WW has asked for an "Oral Hearing" to contest the courts temporary custody orders. She doesn't like the part saying that I get custody of my daughter for 3 hours each week night. This really annoys me! She has been fine to let me see our daughter each night, but if I want something legally entitling me to see our daughter, she freaks out. I talked to her about this and said that we could come up with a compromise that worked for both of us. She freaked out and was unable to compromise.

But what kind of compromise would work for you? If you like it how it is, Gramm, why would you compromise at all? Don't you think its good for your D to see you every evening? I suspect she is against this because it interferes with any social activity she might be planning. Don't help her here, Gramm.

I would not give up time with our girl, but I would trade time around if it fit WW's schedule better.

FOr example, if WW wanted dinner with the girl on thursdays, then maybe I would have the girl spend the night with me on tuesdays... or whatever. You get the idea. I will NOT just give up any of the few hours I get to spend with her...