....will be the 10th anniversary of x moving out.

It took us about 3 1/2 years to get divorced.

But this is starting to weigh sort of heavy on me. He's married. Moved in a few months ago to a new townhouse. Has plenty of money.

I am in the same house I've been in since Heck was a pup - and he died of old age last year. But I have the children. I feel like I'm just scraping by. I'm still working on my issues. I'm still as single as ever, though I really care for the Diplomat, and sometimes we talk of long term maybes. But any reality for that is 5+ years away.

And I'm just now realizing how much I have missed. For so many years.

And I KNOW I have to do something special for this. And it's only 3 days after my birthday. At the time, I asked him to get out before my birthday but he refused.

X could be so much worse. I know that.

But I'm starting to feel this weight in my chest.....And this anniversary is still over a month away.

I hope I survive it.

You will survive it and yes the x would be much worse. It's what it was suppose to be that you are missing!!!

Are you realitively happy, have good health and great relationship with your kids? That is something to be proud of!!!!

It's hard when you see how far the x has moved on and you are still trying to get out of the starting gate, I know I am feeling this big time after this weekend. My priorities aren't centered on me like his are, and that is what is holding me back.

So decide are you going to mourn the date that is upcoming or celebrate it? Perhaps just let it go by as another day on the calander. I did this year on my anniversary, now the one coming up would have been 25 the plan had been to take a road trip in a Mustang. My daughter asks what color are we getting and will it be a new one or a vintage model!!! I am thinking a new rented one for the week so that I can go drop her off at her dads house!!!!

Cin it's all in how we look at it and whether we choose to let it get us down!!!!

My 2 cents worth for tonight!!

Dawn

Dawn, Cin - There is a week long trip to Peru that leaves on the anniversary of my D-Day. I'd like to be on that plane!

I'm sure I can't afford that trip (this year) but I can certainly plan some kind of trip over D-Day to symbolize that I am moving on and leaving him behind.

Cinderella,

Here's something you left at the ball 10 years ago...

<putting on glass slipper>

Now you have everything back worth having from that time...kids, house, sanity, and glass slippers.

Let it pass Cindy, the reality is you got the toast and he got the crumbs from the bottom of the toaster, who cares if he has the butter....ever tried to butter crumbs?

Chin up and good luck

RebornMan

It's easier to fall into the thinking of what was lost, rather what was gained, especially when a significant date rolls around.
Cinderella,

Maybe it's as simple as people & their tendencies to be more or less pessimistic, more or less optimistic. When my anniversary rolled around this year I didn't even think of it until later in the day & it was more a passing recognition.

My focus is on the good that has come to me from this almost finished divorce. Your list is sure to be different than mine but there is positive. For me I'm more free to be me, more free to do things with my boys stbx didn't like to do. I can speak more openly with my boys about how important it is to understand your emotions & be able to express them. That last one is very important as stbx can't do that so now that they are with me more I can show them this by example without stbx popping in as apoor example.

The best thing is that I am free to find a man to love me, for me, one that will be able to show his love for me & let me show him my love for him. Stbx didn't like me to touch his face, hair, hands, & he didn't touch me in that way either. I want that.

There are more positive things that may be kind of minor but still they count & they add up.

I'll keep working on me. I'm really trying to work on my issues. I think they have isolated me a lot. You know we all have secrets.....<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Anyway, life is sweet right now. Hmmm....rent a red mustang, hmmmm. Too bad I don't have anyone other than my children to road trip with......

Cinderella,

You close to Cleveland?

Red Mustang, Road Trip?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Well, I have a red car but it is a Malibu...

Cleveland is not that far away.....

But, in all honesty,.....you do sound like a man.....and I do have a bf.....so, if you were hinting....

But, I was born to road trip!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE a ROADTRIP. As almost anyone who know me personally will tell you, I LOVE a roadtrip.....

So Cinderella,

Whats stopping you from getting your kids and taking a road trip??

Why can't it just be you and them? Memories in the making..

You don't only have to be the hardnose with them, you really can pack a lunch and go for the day.

After my divorce I did that, jumped in the car on the weekend and just went where ever we wanted to go, no time schedule except to be home by monday.

Don't dwell on the date as a negative thing, what is he like? is he still someone you would want to be married too??
and maybe learn to celebrate the day as a day of Freedom, as opposed to something negative.

Just having fun Cinderella..

A road trip sounds awesome!!!

RebornMan

Thinking about road trip for next weekend....maybe....gotta get my act together if that's what we're going to do....

And then we could do another one that weekend.