Its become painfully obvious that the problems in my marriage have come from my depression - I have to get on ADs ASAP if I'm going to save anything - not to mention fix myself now. I am going to a doctor ASAP, I have to get this depression under control.

Is it true however that Ads are a fairly dangerous medicine?

I think they can be. My uncle became suicidal on ADs and killed himself. He was not suicidal before supposedly.

For me, they simply muted out all my feelings. So while I felt no depression, I also felt no joy. I just felt dead and don't remember that year at all. It is blacked out. I would rather be dead than not be present in my life and that is how it was with ADs.

When I quit the ADs, the depression was sitting there in all it's glory just waiting to be addressed. In my case, the depression turned out to be caused by a couple of things: low blood sugar caused by a crappy junk food diet [mainly sugar] and not living right. I learned that living a life of undisciplined chaos greatly contributed to my depression. When I am disciplined and live right, I have peace inside. The greatest lesson I have ever learned in my life was this: happiness is the result of living right. Those are the magic words for me.

Anyway, that was my experience with ADs. Others do have positive experiences with them, though, so I am certainly not dismissing their value.

p.s. the doctor who prescribed my ADs never examined my health at all. It was clear that I was hypoglycemic and it is connnected to depression. Sugar is also a known cause of depression but he never asked about my diet. He simply could tell by psychic ability or something that I had a "serotonin deficiency." I don't know, to this day, how he knew this.

Good idea. While everyone here loves to lament the fact that an affair is all about the neurotransmitters firing in the addictive state, etc...THE SCIENCE behind AD's is sound. They will help you cope with what is happening to you. AD in general are safe meds. They can have side effects, but there are more than enough of them to find the one "suitable" for you.

PLease remember that AD do not work right away and may take up to 2 weeks for you to be feeling any affect. That is the time it takes a drug to reach a steady state in the system.


I do not prescribe AD's as a matter of my general scope of practice, but I have edumacated myslef on them...

BOL,

LM

FoxOr,
I don't know what your definition of dangerous is. Obviously all medications have benefits and side effects. In general, ADs don't have any life threatening side effects. There can be dry mouth, constipation, nausea, diarrhea, etc. A few can affect one's ability to climax sexually. But there are other ones that don't seem to have any effect on your sexual functioning. ADs generally take about 4 to 6 weeks to really get into your blood stream and be effective. There have been reported cases where some individuals develop an extreme anxiety or aggressive response while taking ADs. While it can happen, it's not the norm for the majority.

An AD medication that works well for many people, may have too many side effects or may not be helpful for you at all. That's why I think it's essential to find a prescribing doctor who really knows what they're doing and WILL LISTEN TO YOU! Your feedback will be essential in trying to find a medication that will be most beneficial for you. Always ask about side effects, what to look for, etc. Also, some side effects are short-term. You may experience them when first starting the med, but they might go away over time.

When under great stress, or when there's a family history of depression, our brain chemistry can change. These changes happen as a result of a shift in the chemicals of the brain which regulate thought and/or mood. In order to restore balance to the system, medication is often needed at least on a short-term basis. Kind of like a diabetic who needs insulin to regulate their blood sugar levels. If our brain chemistry is altered, all the talk therapy in the world is going to have little effect on shifting the depression. Both, together, can be very effective.

ADs are not meant to give anyone a "high", or to see the world through rose-colored glasses. They're meant to elevate one's mood back up to a balanced level. Not to shift one's mood above a balanced level.

I have both personal and professional experience with AD medications. I am treated for Major Depression and am a psychiatric social worker. I've seen and experienced the benefits and deficits of AD medications. I think that the most important thing is to be an advocate for yourself with the medical system. If your doctor won't listen to you...find someone else who will!

I wish you the best in finding the help you're seeking.

I think that ML has raised some valid concerns. One should always have a thorough physical exam to rule out any possible physical causation for depression.

What happened with ML's uncle has been known to occur. But, there's been no researched direct "cause-effect" established. It has been hypothesized that one of the reason suicide may happen after starting an AD is that the individual is feeling enough better to act on their depression or anxiety. Prior to that they may have been totally shutdown with no motivation or energy to create and complete suicide...although they were feeling just as depressed or anxious inside.

There's so much we don't know about the brain! I'm just thankful that medications are available to try! Prior to the early 1950s no such medications existed. I have had to try many different ADs. There was no one easy "fix" for me. But I was determined to control this condition so that it couldn't control me...my hopes...my dreams. While not "perfect", they have been a life saver for me.

One thing to add....

A good doctor, while they may prescribe you meds, will also want to run some blood work (checking thyroid levels etc)
to see if there is anything that is physically causing the depression. Sadly, many doctors won't even suggest this.

I wouldn't go to anyone other than a psyciatric doctor for ADs. I never needed them until my WH affair and I waited much too long before getting them. I was suffering terribly from PTSD --- anixiety attacks, depression, sleeplessness, extreme weight loss, hypervigilence, etc. I had to try a couple different things and different dosages until we found what works for me.

I have no side effects. I am much more stable and have put necessary weight back on. I feel much better and function normally. This doesn't mean that I still don't feel sad or depressed sometimes, but it doesn't overwhelm my entire life and render me unable to go about my normal life.

I generally have a healthy lifestyle. I have always had good eating habits, don't smoke, and I exercise daily.

Fox...AD's helped me get through and continue to help me deal with the fallout of infidelity. The first one I was on, Lexapro caused me to have problems sleeping and I lost lots of hair. I am now on Remeron, I sleep like a baby.
for the first few weeks I felt a little on edge but the Dr's can give you something to help with that for a short time. Also with the Remeron my appetite came back and I unfortunately gained 6 of the 26 lbs I lost, back.
The remeron does not make me fuzzy or feel flat lined. It has been really good, especially the sleep thing.

Good luck!!

All 3 of the ADs I tried, (i dont remember their names) made it impossible for me to orgasm during intercourse...needless to say, the W and I wouldn't put up with that. Not to mention none of them made me happier.

A state of the art SSRI like Celexa or Lexapro will help you immensely.

ADs are not supposed to make you happy. They simply keep the terrible emotions from bringing you down too far.

I *highly* recommend them.

Well, I still got extremely sad and unmotivated while I was on the medicine - the only thing I got out of them was the inability to orgasm.

When I first started them I was really happy and hopeful, I noticed change in me; but it was psychological - I thought that they were going to help me, so I was happy; once I saw myself getting sad again - I got depressed knowing they weren't.

Celexa and Lexapro have some of the least side affects. They are SSRI's, which increase seratonin. They take a couple of weeks to really kick in good, but they will help with depression and any anxiety.

Cymbalta is another newer choice. It's an SNRI, similar to Effexor in the way it works. It works on seratonin and neoprepheprine. So with it you might get a little extra energy you don't get from the SSRIs. It can have some unpleasant discontinuance side affects, but they all can to some extent.