My husband and I just recently married and were apart for most of the year of our marriage because of his job.Now we can finally be together and now we are starting to see that we aren't meant for each other, we do not share the same interests, we hardly ever talk to one another. We don't do anyting romantic.We didn't even celebrate our first anniversary. He doesn't do anything to make me feel like a special part of his life because of his past relationships, and didn't bother to tell me that I'd be suffering for his past before he married me.I almost decided to leave, my bags are packed but yet I'm still here.Before he came home I considered myself to be a christian woman but now my faith and esteem has been crushed.I am just hopeless, bitter, disgusted with my marriage, and pregnant. Any advice?

yes... unpack your bags and find yourself a MC ASAP!!

As a Christian you must know that God calls on you to minister to your H if he is a non-believer. You do not get to just walk away when it gets tough... trust me, you will repeat this pattern forever if you did! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

You have many things in your court right now that are probably contributing to this... pregnancy is a HUGE one, the hormones, the need to set things in order to build a "nest"... big contributor. I suffered depression during and after all of my pregnancies!

Your H being away alot and only a yr or so into M? That is tough. You must feel so alone and I bet you think you can just do it without him with less frustration! BTDT, I was a military W in the earlier years of my M...and it was TOUGH!

Sounds like his past is another thing throwing in trouble... it all plays a part!

Regardless, you owe it to yourself and your baby to slow down, take a step back and look at what you might be able to do to help heal this M. If you don't you will always wonder "what if"....

Are you certain there are no other parties involved? Your H's attitude coupled with him being away for long periods of time alarms me, makes me wonder what he might be up to. Have you been 100% faithful in your heart & mind to your H?

What is it that you know you can do, right now, to improve things? What is stopping you from doing it?

I hope you get more response but the weekends are a bit slow, hang in there!

Deewife,

You have to be honest: inside and outside. #1) do you love and value your Husband? #2) do you love and value your future family. Losing #1 will mostly likely kill your marriage. If you really love and value your husband completely, and he is a psychotic criminal in return, then you did all that you can. But, if you give him cold shoulders, then you asking for a divorce. I hope you take the leadership here in saving your marriage, if he is just a follower. Divorce is not a good thing. It is very sad and disturbing that people toss the word “Divorce” like a “grade school break-up.”

Halo

deewife,

I'm sorry your going through this.

What type of things is he interested in doing that you aren't?

What things are you interested in that he isn't?

May I ask what his job is that he spends so much time away?
And did he have this job before you married that you knew he would be required to be gone so much? and you just thought you could handle it? Or is it a new job that he took after you married that you didn't sign on for all the travel?

Is there a way you could travel with him? Or would he be willing to find another job that required no travel?

How are you suffering from his past relationships? Is he comparing you to them? Is he taking things out on you for things they did? Is he still in love with someone from his past?

I'm just needing more information so that we might be able to give more specific advice