Me and my wife have been together for 4 yrs and married for 1. 2 yrs ago we were having really bad money problems and we just had a baby so I panic and join the navy. She supported my decision and was exited about leavening NJ for fl. She told me that this would b a new start for us after the recruiter lied to us both. So when we get to fl and saw that the recruiter was lying she blames me for basically ruining her life. I had to leave for six month she made sure she depressed me while I was out to sea with emails about her being all alone and not knowing anybody. I sent her every dime cuz she had my baby. When I got back she wanted to go to school so I supported that and she went for a couple of months and then we could not afford it anymore so she blames me again while I have to go to a ship everyday to do a job I hate all cuz I thought the navy would help me take care of my family. She wanted to work now she has a job making more than me and things were fine for a while until she said she wanted to start going out with her friends so I said sure cuz I was happy that she was happy. So female friends slowly turn into male and female friends. Then she comes home to tell me she never wants to come home she want to go far away and start all over without me and the kids she needs a break. I took the kids to see family for a week I come home and she tells me that she told a guy she has been talking too that she would go out with him but she never went. Was her asking me to give her a break just so she could go out with another man? I think so. She says she does not no if she wants a divorce or not but she wants to feel free. I no this is the end but I don’t want it to be. Somebody please help me.

Welcome. Please go to the section Plan A and Plan B. You are going to be working very hard, even harder than you have been, because you want to save your marriage.

It's not fair what she's done to you, but you can save your marriage. You have to find out what her emotional needs are. She was lonely while you were gone, isolated, and not mature enough to cope on her own. She needed you. Yes, I know, you were working hard to pay the rent, the bills, buy the baby food, etc. She done you wrong.

Now she's interested in dating other men. She can't do that while she is married to you. FInd a good attorney, and go for custody of the baby. Get that in the works. Don't file for divorce yet; just work on keeping the baby safe from her silliness.

The recruiter screwed you. Your wife turned on you. And now you have to go the extra mile, just when you thought you couldn't keep going. Not fair. Life handed you a rotten hand.

Don't talk about divorce with your wife. Tell her you are standing for your marriage and that you are going to be a better husband and meet all her emotional needs. Take care of yourself, don't let yourself go to seed. No drinking, no sleeping when you have a day off because you are depressed, no cussing or swearing or raising your voice.

Can the base chaplain help you? Does your insurance cover marriage counseling? If so, try to see about having a session with the Harleys.

Wiser heads will be along soon to help you. Stay strong! And thank you for working in the service to protect our country. You are a good man for doing this.