I'm not Mimi I am staying dark and believe me yesterday that was hard.. I wanted to nail his butt to a wall.....

You have no idea how hard I fought myself not to call him ....

It always surprised me how quickly my H settled down after his rages....

My FWH also stopped the direct deposit once...

He started back...

It's a good thing that I can't remember the circumstances..

I've been trying to remember today...

YouR WH is temporarily insane, Hurting. That's what it all boils down to..

WSes can't be figured out..they have NO PLAN..they are lost..

You are the one with the PLAN...

It is sooo important not to REACT to him..

He's trying to bring you down into the pig sty with them...

I am not reacting Mimi I am staying dark and making him think what he has done is not effcting me ......

Don't worry Lady I am not telling DD anything about any plans I have this week... Your right she would tell him...

Even though I collect pigs Mimi, I have no desire to roll around in the sty with him and OW......

hurting,
I'm sorry your WH has hit a new low...just another poor choice he will have to live with. It looks like to me he is still trying to get your attention....remember when he threatened to runaway to Iraq to find a job? Just like a child seeking attention it doesn't matter if its positive or negative just as long as he gets his fix. He knows you'd be upset about not paying the bills. He's just waiting for you to respond....let him wait...stay dark!

Get what ever assistance you can (welfare) we know it will be temporary because we know you will find a way to make this work and come out stronger for it.

Stupid aliens!!

Alrighty then...<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Just saw this on one of your posts


Credit card debit really bites!...but if you're smart with them it can come in handy. Now that you have a job you might want to consider opening credit card account in your name only. Being a SAHM and WH name on all the bills, you probably do not have a credit rating. Get an account with a low available balance like $500, use it for small monthly purchase and pay it in full every month. In case of Emergency it would be handy. And if you ever want to purchase a car or get a loan for school or house you will need your own credit rating. Its something to think about.

Oh believe me my credit is already not in the best shape due to medical bills and such.... So no danger in me getting a credit card. Plus I have a loan that like 3 months past due because of all of this I can't afford to pay it..... choice between utility bills , food and loan ... guess which one lost?

Yeah he has hit a new low..... And believe me it scares the crap out of me.... I am really beginning to wonder if he will ever come out of this mess.

if he is trying to get my attention he sure is going about it the wrong way .... Guess the alien is to stupid to figure that out though .....

You said he left tools there. Is there something worth $$ that you could sell? What about guns. Some attorney's may take an item that's worth something for payment.

I really don't think he has any intention of filing for D. However, you do need to protect yourself further financially and if the only way you can do that is to see an attorney, then so be it. I would try going through Human Resources first though.

What a bonehead, not paying the bills. It's his credit too.

I don't suppose he's too broke to take the kooze OW out bowling on the weekend.

Oh yeah he left all his tools here.... and believe me its $1000.00"s of dollars worth of tools.... He took his guns with him, they are at his sisters house right now. I would not sell those anyway because they are from his deceased father. My MIL would kill me for sure....

I told my MIL yesterday if he can't come through I will start selling the stuff off... If he gets mad to bad, he left me in this bind.

yeah thats what he does not get , everything comes in both our names.... And if ya don't pay utlity bills its goes against your credit as well... And for now the phone bill has been unpaid since it got cut off due to his cutting the money.

Oh I am sure him and OW have a good time.... IN fact I saw on his bank account were they went out to eat at LOnestar steak house for 50.00 bucks.... He never wanted to go there because he didn't like it..... Believe me on his bank statement I have seen lots of lunches and dinners..... And to think when he was home he rarely asked me to lunch and I was home all day.... Well that is the last few months before all this crap happened anyway...

Hurting -

I am so sorry to hear about all of this CRAP!!! I am thinking about you and am livid that he is doing this. Incredible.

Did you check out the links posted elsewhere for legal help? I was searching for my state earlier and I believe that most states have low cost/no cost assistance. Please keep looking & checking into that.

My prayers are with you.

Kimberly
D-Day May 14th
DS, age 6
Married 13 years
WH moved out Friday. Going into Plan B.

I have been doing some research Kim , I w ill find a way to fix this somehow....

I have got to have some kinda reality hit him square in the face. I really believe he thinks he can get away with all of this. Maybe for now but not for long.....

I also blieve he does not think I will do anything. He knows I love him and want him home so he is playing that card right now. He thinks since I want these thing I will take whatever crap he hands out.

A few weeks ago maybe so because of the fear of making him mad, well that not the case anymore. He can get mad all he wants, I really don't care anymore I am not a doormat. Took a w hile to figure that out, but I am his wife of 24 yrs, the mother of his children and I will not be treated this way anymore.....

Thank you for your prayers, I appreciate them.... I hope you are doing ok tonight. I have thought of you to and how you are holding up.... I know its tough but you will make it....

I barely slept at all last night with all this stuff running through my head.....

I can't wait until tomorrow so I can start doing something to try and resolve some of this.

I never thought he would go so low. Guess I should have known better, seeing how he could even have an A should have let me know how little he cares at this point...

Have you changed the locks so he can't get in and take his tools back since you've now alerted him to that game plan?

Good Morning Hurting,

Sorry to hear you haven't slept well. I didn't either.
I have been so upset. I have been up finding every prayer chain I can find on line to pray. Hope you feel better today.

Love, Lady

he can't get in the house and he has not been alerted to anything .... He has no idea what my plans are.... In fact he is out on the road driving doing his job. He has not been able to get in the house since he left.

Lady, I am sorry you have been upset as well... Its rough time you are going through. I do hope things will turn around for you soon.... Your in my prayers...

Ok I was doing pretty good when I woke up, but all of a sudden the sadness has hit me again.

why do I keep trying to figure this out?

Why do I keep replaying the past in my head so I can see were things went wrong?

why do I even care anymore after all he has done to our family?

I keep feeling like I should hate him for this but I can't bring those feelings to the surface. I feel like if I could it would be so much easier. Why do I want this man back?
If he ever comes back will I always walk on eggshells for the fear if I do one thing wrong he will walk again? This is all so confusing to me.....

Well I got off work early today.... I was so upset and feeling like crap. My boss knows we are seperated but I have not told her the whole story. Anyhow we were slow so she let me leave and come home....

I have so many things to do in the next 2 days while I am off work. I feel for DD she thought her father was the greatest thing, now that he has done this and thrown us to the wolves so to speak and not worrying about us she is devestated by it.....

She just says mom why is he doing this to us? Whydoes he not care anymore..... I have tried explaining it to her but she is only 18 and a daddy's girl and has a hard time believeing he could do this. She is now to the point of not wanting anything to do with him....

This is just so sad how now all of his children don't want him anymore.... They feel so deserted and unloved by him. What is it going to take for him to see the damage he is doing?

I have recieved two phone calls from Huntsville Ala. on my cell phone.... I have not answered them. There is no voice message left... I could be wrong but I have a feeling its WH calling...... No way am I amswering any numbers I don't know and with him being all over the place I never know where he is.... I figure if its important who ever it is can leave a VM.....

Hi there,

I hope you are feeling better. I know its so difficult for you. I wonder too if it was WH calling. Would he leave a VM if it was him?

H and I had a big conflict yesterday, set back to square 1. I was up most of the night, exhausted. I slept til 1 pm today. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />
Thankfully he took care of DS so I could sleep.
But we are working on it and coming to resolutions today. It's hard work!

Thankyou for you prayers, God answered.

Love, Lady

Lady,

I am so sorry you are having a rough time. I am glad you are working on things. I know it will be a long road but , you will make it i am sure.... It's just going to take time... I am so happy God answered your prayers.

Prayer really does help. I just hope someday mine are answered as well.

I found out who the calls were from. they were from this prepaid legal service I contacted.... I think I may have found a way to get something done through them. Its a 35.00 a month plan and they get you a local attorney. I told them my problem and they can help me. I will have to wait until next week to get the 35.00 to start it and then they will start everything for me..... I hope it pans out... I am still going to go to family court tomrrow though and see what I can do from there....

Oh yeah if and wh calls he usually does leave VM. thats why I was not sure. I had DD call the number back just to see who it was, thats how I found out.