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Slammed,

You said it all. Thats exactlly how I feel every last word of it.

I know it will get better, it has to I can't imagine it getting any worse. I won't let it get worse.

We will just keep praying and moving on with life we don't have many more choices than that.

Take Care of yourself...

Hurting


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Well today was not to bad a day. I felt pretty good most of the day.

I went to work tonight and things were going well and about 2:30 am I turned and slipped on some soap on the floor. Next thing I know I am down face first on the floor and banged up my knee pretty good. Its all bruised and swollen.

So after getting myself together I came home. I hope its better by tomorrow so I will be able to go into work. The supervisor wanted to take me to the hospital but I said no, let me go home put ice on it and see what happens. But we did do a report just in case.

This is just what I did not need to get hurt on the job. gezz when are bad things gonna stop happening to me?

Anyhow other than that the day went well. Didn't think much about WH only had one bad time this evening. So I think its getting better.


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,197
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Ouch! ((Hurting))

I hope you feel better fast!


Me-41 BS (FWS)
DH-41 WS (FBS)
2DD's- 10 and 12
Married 15 years
Separated for 2 years after my A
Reconciled for 1 year before his A
D-day for his A 8/23/05
WH moved out 9/16/05
Divorce final 1/23/07
Affair ended or month or so later
My Story
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Hi Hurting!

Be sure to rest a lot today and not do too much with that knee. I got hurt once at work & didn't plan on going to the hospital - got talked into going & turned out I broke my foot!!!

If you aren't feeling any better today, you really might consider going just to make sure.

Kim


D-Day May 14th, 2005
Married 16 Years
DS age 8
6 months Plan A
Plan B 10-11-05, H moved back in June 2007, Very False Recovery.
2nd Day-Day 7/7/08 Kicked WH Out.
Plan B for my sanity
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
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OUCH!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Sorry to hear about your accident. I would get it checked out. Worker's comp thingy. Also knees have a funny way of showing up with more injury at a later date. I'm no doctor and don't wnat to scare you but want you to make sure you w/b ok.

take care,
L.

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Sorry to hear that you hurt yourself, hurtinginok. Do rest up that knee and seek advice/ medication if possible.

I twisted my knee many yrs back and coz I was stubborn, I didn't go to the doctor and over-stressed it while it was still hurt. It has never healed properly. So sometimes when there's too much stress on my leg, I limp alittle and that causes some bad alignment on my back too. I have to visit a chiro from time to time.

~A

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Hi Hurting,

Sorry to hear about your knee. :-( I hope it heals up quickly with no lasting injury.

Lady

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Thanks all. My knee is hurting pretty bad since I have been up. I am thinking I should maybe stay home tonight and stay off of it.

I don't think going to work and limping around would be a good thing. it's not a swollen but it really hurts to bend it. I will keep an eye on it and put some more ice.

Take Care everyone,

Hurting


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 981
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Hurting, I am so sorry about your fall.

My heart goes out to you, because it makes us b/s feel so vulnerable when we get hurt and don't have our spouse to fall back on for support.

Take care of yourself, and consider yourself hugged

((((Hurting))))


In the end, I have nothing to lose but everything to gain, by trying to save my marriage.

Me, betrayed wife 46
Former Wandering Husband, 51 E/A 2005
28 years of marriage
DD 26, DS 24
O/W aka, Rat 29, A-D Assisted Living
Discovery 8-20-05 Recovery ongoing.
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Hurting, Do you you think you should have your knee checked out? Maybe an x-ray?

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Lady,

I don't know I think its just bruised up pretty good. I hate to go to the dr for nothing. I think I will give it today and see what happens.

I hate not going to to work i really need the money as you know. So I'm not sure what to do yet.

KD your right I was crying on the way home last night thinking about WH not being here for me. He was always here for me when I had a problem or got hurt. DD is trying to be helpful. This whole thing just sucks.....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Jun 2003
Posts: 2,424
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Hurting, do you have a wrap to keep your knee straight?

Also...Keep off of it and keep it elevated....Okay.

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Lady,

I don't have a wrap but I have it proped up....

It will be ok.

Dang when will all of this bad luck stop. I am ready for the New Year and hopefully it will be better....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 782
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Hurting-
Sorry to hear about your injury. Do take it easy and get to
the Dr if you need to, okay ? Speaking from experience with
numerous ankle injuries, the suggested treatment is R.I.C.E.
(rest- ice- compress- elevate) !!

My weekend started out better than I expected, as a good friend called late yesterday afternoon to see if I wanted to
go to a movie with her and her husband. It was nice to have
somewhere to go and people to be with instead of hanging out at home ! Today I'm working (just four hours) then plan
to run some errands and possibly meet a friend for lunch.
Will do some housework and laundry, maybe watch a movie at
home tonight. Might also work on some crafts this weekend-

My WH called last night (hadn't heard from him since Tues)
and we had an okay conversation. Was surprised to find out
WH is putting us on the "family plan" with his new medical
insurance since things are so "up in the air" !
Still not a word about Thanksgiving- and I'm going to just
make my own plans not wait on WH.
Hope the rest of your weekend is good- take care !
Slammed

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Hurting,

This c/b a good time to get some stuff done. How? Well make a list of things you need the WS and children t/d.

Do let all your children know about this, ok?

1. Pay bills (list priority)
2. Buy groceries (list items and stores)
3. House cleaning chores. (divi them up fairly)
4. Meal preparation - Maybe a friend can help or give the
kids the option to be a chef. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
5. Make sure you get attended too!

In other words.....delegate. You may be pleasantly surprised. At the very least, you will have a list and to show others how much you do. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Yea, you got it right that I am recommending that you get the WS involved. U R injured. Don't be a martyer. There's stuff he can do w/o getting in your face.

Time to put the word out and organize a short term plan to keep your family going. I am sure your D can help out. Your son may also have a few suggestions. Make them part of your delegation review board and get them started. The WS is probably only able to take orders at this point. We know he isn't good at making decisions. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Hugz,
L .

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I like Orchid's idea,
Especially letting w/s help. Allowing w/s to do a couple of things might also push o/w's button, and encourage her to get green with jealousy and do some lbing.


In the end, I have nothing to lose but everything to gain, by trying to save my marriage.

Me, betrayed wife 46
Former Wandering Husband, 51 E/A 2005
28 years of marriage
DD 26, DS 24
O/W aka, Rat 29, A-D Assisted Living
Discovery 8-20-05 Recovery ongoing.
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Hiok,

Now be prepared that not everyone (esp the WS) will want to help. Some of that help (esp w/children and WS) may require monitoring and proding. U decide how much is too much or enough.

Don't set your expectations too high. But don't make your list too short. Delegate and expect some of it NOT t/b done.

Low expectations, high results. Less disappointment, yields some prodcutivity and some much needed rest for you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

L.

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Well I have some news some good some not so good.

WH was served this morning. He told SIL he got the papers this morning and he wants to know why it says supervised visits with DS. I told SIL this is standard stuff. He admitted to her he had been avoiding the papers on purpose. Well then he told her he went to his attorney to file and was told he had to get these papers to be able to file for the D. So he took them so he could file.

So seems he is going to counterfile for the Divorce. I am so upset right now. I never thought he would go through with this. So I guess I will probably be served d papers soon. I just can't believe he is going to do this....

I don't think I stand a chance now at my marriage. It's going to be over..... I don't expect any help from WH I do believe he is done and does not care at all...

Last edited by hurtinginokla; 11/19/05 03:11 PM.

BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 3,609
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What should I do ???? Should I talk to him or what? I am so scared now this is really going to happen....

I don't want a divorce..... I feel like I am dying here....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 2,959
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Remember, this is a foggy WS. Don't believe anything he says, believe what you SEE in action(s) from him. He will have all weekend to "bask in the glow" of where his bad choices have led. The reality of spousal support and child support, not to mention structured visitation with his kids, will cast a really dark cloud over him... perhaps giving him cause to pause.

((((((((((((((hurting))))))))))))))))

Don't cash in right now. This could be a new beginning, rather than the end!

Best wishes,
SD

You are in Plan B right now, so stay dark, dark, dark!

Last edited by shattered dreams; 11/19/05 03:20 PM.

BH - me 53, ONS 1979
FWW - 51, 2 EA's, 1 PA
Last D-Day, Sep. 30, 2003
Last Contact/recovery began 2-26-04

***You can do anything with time and money...but remember...money won't buy you time!***
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