Yes she used to have a sugar daddy..... At least that what WH told me... I wondered the sam thing about who piad for it. She does not make much money working at Home Depot, WH is the one making good money so I don't get why she would buy it and not him.

The only thing I can figure is them saying she bought it and maybe putting it in her name so it can't be used as marital asscets. I have no clue. I do want to find out though if its in his name or hers. If its in his seems to me he would be considered marital asccest. Maybe they are trying to pull one over me by claiming she bought it so it won't count against him with the asscet thing....

Well I went out and raked up the leaves and picked up the neighbors trash from my yard. It is a nice sunny fall day.

As I was outside our old neighbor came by to borrow a ladder. Its the first time I have seen him since WH left. He told me him and his wife saw him and WH told him about us being seperated and that it was my fault how I ignored him and all.

I tld my friend about WH living with OW and he was shocked because WH din't tell that part. He said well keep standing up for yourself because he will regret this and come back. I told him after all this time I don't know. He said OW will give him what he deserves just be patient. He said if I need anything to give him a call and he will help me with things here if I need it....

So some small exposure is still happening in a way.

good! of course the ws will NOT mention his involvement in the affair. he wants world to feel sorry for him so they will ACCEPT his stupid affair and the ow...and NOT take your side! it is about that. My xh said same stuff. said we'd grown apart, not in love, etc...but FAILED TO MENTION THAT OW WAS SHACKING UP WITH HIM IN MY DREAM HOUSE...:>

Yeah it really sucks when they do this stuff.... Lying comes so easy to them .....

I just hope that this new car of his is in his name and not hers..... If so he just made a big mistake, because it now become part of the marital assets....

I have been thinking though about what all of you said if she did buy it, she is doing it to keep him around.... How sad is that ?

Orchid: Yea, the WS truly believes they have the right to rewrite history. Of course that c/b because the WS was NEVER there for those events. LOL!!!

Forgetting the 'minor' detail of having an A but blaming the BS for being separated? He thinks everyone is as dense as the OW? Ha! Stupid WS'.


Orchid: Yea, I think the OW is now spending $$ to keep the WS under her control. Also be aware that if she is like that, she maybe after your assets as well. In my case, the OW wanted to control more than the WS. Her conquest was to take over the entire family and be the royal dictator. Hm..... kinda like Camilla. Well in my case, the OW is nutz and that combined with reverse babbling/MB/support techniques, we blew that alien out of the water. LOL!!!

Be safe. Keep on exposing. The WS will get more funny stares...... BTW, the next time asks if you have been talking about him.... you can tell him, 'no dear, those nice people came to those conclusions by what you said, so why are you babbling such stupidity?' <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

L.

Hurting - This is normal WS stuff. You should have heard the excuses my WH gave to people. He told a neighbor that we split because I was just not into motorcycles anymore.

That one really made me see red. WH had always wanted to buy the anniversary year (2003) Harley. I worked OT like a dog to get the downpayment, turned in all of the credit applications, and went from dealer to dealer with him to get the one he wanted.

It barely had 500 mile on it, when he rode off into the sunset with OW. GRRRRRRRRR..........

Orchid,

You amy be right but we have no assets to worry over. The house is back in his moms name and we have no money or anything to generate any money.

The house is going to be sold to my SIL when I move out after all of this is over. Unless WH comes home and we work things out then we will be able to buy it. It's a long complicated story. But WH knows he has lost the house if we divorce. After living here for almost 18 yrs. I feel like I will have lost everything when I have to move. MIL says I can stay here until I am ready to move. She is not pressuring me at all but I feel that if this happens I need to get on my own to move on... Away from the memories and make something new for myself and DS..... I still pray WH will come home but I can't live on hope forever.....

Beleiver,

I know most of what he says is babble. Some people do buy into it though.

I just feel like with this car thing that they are pretty set into coupledom...... I know this may not be true but it just feels like it......

My mom says she don' think OW paid fr the car, she thinks they are just saying that to throw me off. Which I guess could be true. She says OW probably got tired of WH taking her car every weekend and putting miles on it. She was probably B****ing about it and he decided to get a car. Seeing how his truck eats gas.... Like mom said him making another bill for himself while all of this is going on was stupid. Maybe this is why he never had any money , saving for a car and a divorce left him broke ....... What an idiotic thing to do ...... But something tells me this car will be in her name just to throw me.... But like my mom said if he paid for it and its in her name he better hope OW will sign it over to him, she may just screw him over it if he tries to ever leave.....

Well I am about to go to work. Just wanted to say goodnight and send prayers to all of you...

I have an appointment tomorrow with the attorney to go over things for friday. The closer it gets the more nervous and scared I get. I wish I had a way to know I can make it through without falling part. Never in a million uears did I think I would ever face my own H in a court room talking about our marriage. I am so scared I can't eat , sleep or anything......

I wll let everyone know how things go tomorrow and what my lawyer says about this car thing....

Good night all

you'll be fine...remember this is business when you're dealing with a ws.

i will say a prayer for peace for you tomorrow...

you are a wonderful person :P

one day you will either be healed, happy and moving on...or else the ws will realize in the nick of time what he's lost and seize the day...

if not, it's his loss.

how do I handle this.... We recieved a tax rebate check from the state. We both have ot sign it and since we no longer have a joint account since he pulled his name off it, we will have to be together to cash it.

I don't want to have to be at the bank with him but it looks like i have no choice in this... Bad enough I have to see him friday in court. What do I do ?????

take the check to court and co-sign it with witnesses present (both your attorneys)

would this work?

Thats and idea Pep. I will ask my attorney today since I have an appointment a 11:00 to go over the stuff for friday....

Reminds me so far my attorney had not heard anything about his divorce papers he supposedly turned in 2 weeks ago.... Nothing has been filed yet. Maybe the holiday slowed things down who knows....

Hurting,
I have followed your thread with sadness. You have had to endure a lot over the past several months and I hurt for you.

I almost divorced, but luckily my H came out of the fog when he found out I had cancer. Funny, I had to have a disease to make him see the error of his ways.

But my real point is make sure you tell your lawyer if you are thinking of moving out of state. Some states will not let you move your children out of the county or school district without the non-custodial parent's permission.

My best,
BBE

I just had my meeting with my attorney. first of all I may not have to face WH at all. He says we will be in seperate rooms and will try to come to an agreement on things. The only way we will have to see each other is if we can't agree on spousal/CS money issues or property. Then we would have to go in fromt of the judge and each tell our side.

I told him about the car deal he said it would be stupid of WH to have the car is his name but for now lets not worry about it since this is only a temporary hearing to set up CS and custody etc.

As far as the tax check goes he said bring it with me to court and we will take care of it. I told him that WH told SIL he had no problem paying the requested amount of support, so with that my attorney said really thats good so he upped the amount requested and will work from there. Also we will set visitation up for DS and request no over night visits as long as WH is co-habitating with a member of the opposite sex. My attoreny feels this will be granted by the judge with no problem seeing how this is an affair.

He is requesting half of WH'S 401 K be distributed to me as well. I did tell him my desire to move out of state if/when this divorce goes through. He did say he spoke to WH'S attorney and see's no custody battle. WH has not even requested custody. Guess he does not want to be a full time dad anymore.... He said it should be no problm if I want to move with DS.

So sounds like my life now is all about $$$$$.... I started crying and my attorney said I know the emotional side of this is something we attorneys always forget. We tend to talk money and property. I told him I still had hope my WH would come to his senses but I know I am doing what i have to right now. So anyway I meet my attorney at his office 9:45 friday and hopefully won't have to come face to face with WH. But I won't settle for mere scraps just to keep from seeing him. If we have to go in front of the judge so be it..... I feel so down right now because this is all so final feeling.... I just hate what has happened.....

I know this won't change things right now but I hope some of this reality at least makes a dent in the fog...

Hello hurting ~
Glad to hear you got more information, and hope you won't need to see WH at all ! It sounds like your attorney is
good and is trying to be supportive as well-

I've been feeling like there have been some small, subtle
changes, hopefully for the good, with my WH, but then had
a really bad day yesterday and am feeling really confused
and down about things today- (will update my thread).

I think you are continuing to do a great job and hope and
pray for your WH to get his head out of the fog !! SOON !
Hugs
Slammed

Slammed,

Thank you for the support. I really wish he would get his head out as well but I just don't see it happening anytime soon. Something tells me it will be after our lives have been totally seperated before he sees te light. It will cost us much money and great pain for him to get it, if he ever does.

Again ty for your support....

I am just so down today...... All of this talk of money and dividing things and custody is just so over whelming..... I just want it to be over......

Hurting -

I'm so sorry .....wish there was something I could say to help you feel better. Just know we are all thinking about you.

I am sure that all of this legal crap is totally awful. God is with you though, just remember that. He is picking you up in his arms and carrying you through this.

HUGS.

Kim

Hey (((Hurting))),

I'm sorry that you are feeling down and going through this. I will be going through this pretty soon myself. Hang in there.

My WH stood my kids up for the first yesterday. What are these WS's thinking. Sometimes I wish there was a pill or something to help them get out of the fog.

I keep you in my prayers.

LaShell