{{{Hurting}}},

I'll be praying for you tommorrow that God will give you strength, peace and that everything will work out to your good. Just know that God is there with you. For He promises to never leave or forsake us.

God Bless,
LaShell

Good luck today, Hurting.

Alph.

Thank you all for the support. I have faith everything will be just fine.

I have to tell you all what happened this evening at work. I was cleaning the lobby of BK when all of a sudden a Big Truck came into th parking lot. I looked at it and knew right away who it was. Yes it was WH..... He came in and my heart skipped a beat or two. He said can i talk to you. There were a lot of people around so not to make a scene I listened.

He told me he was suppose to sign the papers for divorce tomorrow. I just said are you sure this is what you want? He then told me he has decided not to sign them or file for now. He said he talked to a firend of his that had divorced his wife of many years. This man told him WH please be sure this is what you truley want because I live everyday regreting divorcing my wife. He told him to go get a movie called the Temptation of Christ or something along those line and there is a certain scene in it he told WH to pay close attention to. He told me he was going to get this movie and watch it.

He also said things at OW'S are not what I think they are. He told me he is moving out, I asked him what was the problem he didn't want ot talk about it right then, I said thats ok when your ready to talk you will. He told me he has not given up on us. That made my heart just jump. I told him I had not wither but that I can't make his descions for him or make him love me.

We did not really discuss tomorrow except for the fact I told him that this is something I never wanted but he left me no choice. He said I know.

Now I know this is all talk and no action, so I am not getting my hopes up to high. Now if tomorrow he does not sign those papers it will be a step in the right direction. I know have to just sit back and watch his actions and see what he does.

I finally told him I had to get back to work, he said I will see you tomorrow.

I just don't know what to think, I did tell him I want to reach an agreement tomorrow but I was not backing down. So he knows tomorrow is going to happen and I will not back down. If this was a ploy to get me to back off he knows that is not going to happen. I told him this up front before he told me everything else. I am a little leary of all this but I am praying its a step towards something good.....

There was much more i wanted to ask him about N/C with OW but this was not the time or place with people watching and listening. I am just going to have to watch his actions and see what he does. I only teared up a few times but held my ground. I know I may get blasted for talking to him but with the situation and were I was causeing a big scene would not have been good for my job. So after court tomorrow its back dark.

Oh and to tell you he looked pretty good. I did notice one thing his beard and mustache was almost totally gray. I was so shocked, it had gotten that gray just since last time I saw him. He has aged. He did tell me i looked great and he commented on my weight loss and how I had not been this small since high school. I got a lot of smiles from him and the look in his eyes was like a man longing for something he has been missing........

Ok I am rambling now ...I must try and get some sleep for tomorrow or actually this morning......


Hurting

Oh my gosh, Hurting.

I don't know what to say. My eyes are filling up, too.

Just try to stay focused today!

I'll be thinking of you.

{{{Hurting}}}

Alph.

Dear Hurting,

I was gonna close up for the night but got a chance to read your post. No lamblasting here. I understand your need to hear from your H vs the WS.

Now when you have your meeting, you stand your ground. You will see his truer motives at that meeting. It will help you decide if M recovery is within reach or farther away.

Those are words out of his mouth. Some true, some mixed up. You can't rely on anything but solid proof. Continue with your plan. Even if the separation and CS is put into play, if he is truly repentant, he will understand it is necessary. He should not be angry if he has remorse in his soul. Again, watch the eyes. They tell all.

Be firm and resolved. This is your family you are fighting for.

Try this out.....put your left arm on your right shoulder and your right arm on your left shoulder.......now squeeze your hands on each shoulder....... there, you just received an MB hug from me 2 u. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Btw, don't do that in court tomorrow..... it does look kinda funny in public. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

take care,
L.

Hurting,

Your post made me well up, too! Good for you for standing up for what yourself! I do hope that it's a step in the right direction.

Now, a word of caution. Do you remember Danielle? Her H would tell her whatever she needed to hear in order for her to give him what he wanted in court. That situation was a little special anyway, but it's important to remember that this **could** be another way of him getting what he wants.

OR, it could be where Peachy's WH was a few days ago - almost at the bottom... I heard Peachy's WH hit the bottom, maybe yours is ready to, too. When he told you that he might be moving out of OW's, well, if it's true, it's a BIG step in the right direction.

Good luck today, I'll be watching for an update.

Cat

Hurting ~

When i read your post about the mysterious phone call, I did not think for a second your husband was lying about it. I did not think your husband was desperate at all.

I thought immediately, AH HA, there is trouble in paradise and the OW is desperate. I bet she is worried that WH is headed back to his wife!

Methinks that OW is trying to keep your husband from returning and trying to cause trouble between you two.

And sure enough, here comes hubby to tell you in person that OW isn't all that, and he's having second thoughts.

This isn't recovery though, he's still a WH. Hang tight to your plan B until he is willing to prove nocontact.

Hurting-
Immediately thought of you when I woke this morning, so came by to check in.

My absolute gut feeling is you are being played. Not that you are falling for it, THANK GOD, but WH showed up at that time to throw you into a tizzy. He thinks he knows how to keep you 'in your place' and that's by giving you hope that if you wait it out he will come back. This way he can play out his drama with OWSkankWh*re and know you are waiting.

We've seen this many,many times here. Each time its happened, the BS comes to us so happy about what their WS has said, we warn them, they dont listen and they get BURNED. Then they have to schlep themselves back to MB completely humiliated that they didnt listen to the warnings.

And gee, how very ARROGANT of him to decide everything that is happening in your life.

Please continue with your plans today with a FIRM RESOLVE to protect yourself and your family.

Thanks All,

Do not worry I am not backing down and I told him as mych last night. He knows this CS and SS is going through today.

He said he knew it as. I did tell him that if he had continued to do the right thing this never would have went this far. I told him I am going through with this because he left me no choice. So he knows I am not backing down.

He seemed sincier in his words but I have learnd enough to know ACTION speaks louder than words... I am waiting for actions now not words ... So he did not suck me in .....


I pray what he said is truthful but only time will tell. In the meantime my actions will stay the same..... All will be ok...... I stayed very strong and it felt good

edited to add: He did ask me about the boyfriend thing. I told him no I have not been out with anyone because I am a married woman and I don't cheat, I will stay faithful to my vows until I am not married. But that I had been asked out and turned them down. Which is true. Orchid, Do not worry I will be watching the eyes and his actions today. If he gets anfry I will know it was a ruse.... But I am ready for it, yes it will hurt but I am strong enough now I can take it....... He will not pull the wool over my eyes......I promise you that .

(((Hurting)))

I am praying for you today. I like what the previous poste said, if he is starting to feel repenant, he will not have anger in his heart today.

Legally, you are in good shape, and you sound like you are in good shape emotionally. Let us know how it goes today.

Jean,

I will post as soon as I get back home to let everyone know how it went....

All prayers are welcome and needed. I am praying as hard as all of you this goes well and he meant what he has said.

But in case not I will be ok. I will have my legal stuff done and thats what matters right now..... again ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS !!!!!!!! That is my new motto......



Hurting

"He told me he is moving out"

You should read this as "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah"

If he starts babbling at the attorneys, calmly let him know that you will discuss your marriage when he HAS moved out and wants to be married.

You'll both be in my prayers today.

don't have anything else to add to what has already been said, but wanted to wish you the best for today.

Prayers and HUGS to you Hurting and your family. ANd yes for H that he is fighting his way out of the alien WH. You are strong and standing your ground for your family.

Thanks all


Believer my friend I know what you mean.... I won't believe it until I see it .... Like I said Action is all I want to see right now..... Words mean nothing ....... Been hurt to many times by his words, I am not falling for that again... I feel very strong this morning and here I thought I would be a bowl full of jelly and nerves. Maybe seeing him last night let me know I can stand up to him and not fall apart. maybe it was a good thing.....

I feel confident and am sure of what I am doing, its the right thing.......

l I am off to court ...... Will give you update when I return .....

Waiting for the update...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Hurting,

Hoping God intervenes, and all happens in your favor.

Lady

Well I am back and things went very well. We came to an agreement in like 10 mins. He agreed to all I asked for with no problem. In fact he gave more than we anticipated.

No anger was shown in fact when I got to my attorneys office this morning he informed me that WH'S attorney had called him and told him WH was not going to sign the D papers. He decided he was not ready for that. I told my attorney that WH had told me that last night.

WH and I talked while waiting for this to all start. WH told me that he was definatley moving from OW'S. Not sure when but he says things are not that good. He says she is pushing him away and very critical of him. He said she gets very angry anytime my name is mentioned and he has told her I would always be part of his life. So she is LB"ing all over the place by what he says. She told him he was not to see me or speak to me and he told her that would never happen.

So all in all today was a good day. Now all I can do it sit back and watch the action. When I see the action of him moving from OW'S then I will know he is being truthful until then , back to planb and taking care of me.

Thanks again for al lthe support and well wishes.

Hurting

P.S. I was strong and only teared up a couple of times and held my ground. WH said please don't cry I hate when you cry..... WhoooHHHHooooo I feel so good that things went my way today .........


PS.S. Orchid I w atched the eyes and they were clear and very telling. He actually could look at me in my eyes when he talked. Never once did his gaze wander away. This is the first time in months he could actually look at me and speak without looking away. He never had his eyes dart all over the place.... I was impressed with that .... He did not have that lost look about him at all.....

I have a feeling he realized he was going to have to show you some RESPECT and that he wasn't going to get to do what he pleases.

GOOD FOR YOU!