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#1544543 12/22/05 07:10 PM
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Let me explain the situation:
I'm a 40 year old male, living with my girlfriend who is 53. (Yes I like older women). We have been living together for about 2 years. Next July we are getting married.

I'm thinking alot about getting a vasectomy lately. Even though my girlfriend is going through menopause (not sure on spelling). We talked about this when I first started seeing each other, we dropped the subject and went on with our life together. Now days I'm thinking about it more and more about getting the vasectomy. I know for a fact that she and I do not want kids. I do know that we can talk to each other about anything. I want to tell her this, but I'm not sure how she would react.

My question is what should I do? Should I go ahead and tell her my feelings about this? (She and I know that I have a fear of going to the doctor's office.)

carp652004 #1544544 12/22/05 07:18 PM
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What's the chances of pregnancy here? 1:1,000,000 or greater isn't it?


Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
bigkahuna #1544545 12/22/05 07:22 PM
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Do you mean she might think you want it for unsavory reasons?

Explain. What's the bad reaction you imagine?

GC

graycloud #1544546 12/22/05 07:25 PM
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Since your fiance is 53 the likelyhood of pregnancy is very, very small which if I were her would lead me to believe you are cheating on me. Is that an issue here?


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
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Guys. You are reading too much into this.

He is either trying to get a rise out of you (look at the post count) or he has a legitimate question.

If he has a legitimate question (and if you do, carp, I apologize about the earlier comment) I would say this...

If you tell her about it before hand, it is something intimate that you share with her.

If you tell her about it afterward, it is something intimate you COULD have shared.

If you don't tell her at all, what kind of relationship is that?

The choice is not hers, it is your body.

AND, no matter the choice, you will learn something about your partner and touchy subjects.

Tell her.

NCWalker #1544548 12/22/05 07:40 PM
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Thank you for your reply. I will tell her.

I have read articles about this subject and what the pros/cons are. I also read about the lovemaking afterwards it is more tense (you might say) than without having the surgery.

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Faithful,

I have never cheated on her and never will. I have never cheated on any woman that I have been with before I met her.

I have read articles on vasectomy's and there are pros/cons in any situation. But the article that caught my eye. Was the love makeing was more intense than normal. Thus is why I would like to have the surgery.


Robert

carp652004 #1544550 12/22/05 09:15 PM
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Well, smoking pot makes love making more intense than normal, but I wouldn't recommend it.

A vasectomy is surgery. If there is no worry about birth control, I wouldn't get it. As with any surgery, there is a chance of complications.

believer #1544551 12/23/05 06:50 AM
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Well, smoking pot makes love making more intense than normal, but I wouldn't recommend it.

THIS is why I adore believer.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

ARK

ark^^ #1544552 12/23/05 08:28 AM
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I wouldn't do it. There is no need for it and you risk complications after surgery..infection. Isn't there a higher rate of prostate cancer after vas.?

carp652004 #1544553 12/23/05 04:30 PM
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I talked to over with my honey last night, we had a nice conversation that lasted about 2-3 minutes. She basically said to me "If you still want to get married in July, DO NOT HAVE THE OPERATION!!!!!".

So basically she talked me out of having a Vasectomy. I love my wife to be....

Yes I love my honey, and yes I will Marry her in July.


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