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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 35
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 35
Breif history,me-bs/42..ww/42. M 24 yrs,14 yo b,21yo M d.
Playing "recovery" for 2 yrs. Repeat "friendships" w/hs sweetheart(her 1rst love)

Just needed to talk,so please bear w/me,ok?
Yesterday morning,I asked her a simple question about refi our business debt.three yrs ago(approx)we took a 2nd on the house (sba loan) at which time I found out that I didnt own our house,she did?and that several other assetts had been transfered to her.Long story a very ugly...

Anyway,after tracking sales and doing forecast I figured out real fast that the corp.(a franchise)projections on our market was wayyyy off,and that we needed to refi the debt to maxiumize cashflow.She refused to aven talk about it(yes,being w/him was all consuming at that time)I was told that she needed the note paid off of "HER" house as soon as possible.I explained that if we didnt manage this that we would lose "HER HOUSE".Her response?She knew that I would lose it anyway,thats why she had to protect herself from me.

Fast foward to yesterday...

I've sold 2 of the locations,have a qualified buyer for the third and strong bites on the fourth.I've sold everything to stay afloat...weekend house on the river,boat,tractor,airplane,trailers,equipment(i'm in the construction business)investment property,rental property.Had my truck repoed(but she had $30,000 in the bank
she still has her car,her house,her land 30 acres,has quit her job and is a full time student again,but i've lost everything,all because she wouldnt let "us" restructure the debt.
Yeah,theres more stuff,but thats it in a nutshell.

Shes promised me and promised me that if I just give her some space,that she will do what needs doing.Always promises,never seems to get to it though.She told me what I needed to do w/the proceeds from this next sale,which will be very detrimental financially to us.When I asked her yesterday what she was going to do,and when,all I got was more "crap" and told how terrible I am.
I tried again to show her the numbers,but then all I got was the same passive aggressive stuff that I always get.

That was when it finally hit me...ya know,she dont give a d*@m about me.Like a slap upside my head,I finally get it.I dont even exist here.

Sorry so long,but I did leave out A LOT of stuff.Really,I did.

Guess my name truley says it all

Bill

Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 2,160
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Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 2,160
Sorry to hear you've come to this point in your life. You just can't love someone who doesn't want to be loved and there's a point past which trying makes no sense. Sometimes, you have to let go simply to save your sanity. It's sad, but it's a fact. Hang in there. My thoughts are with you.


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