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ToddAC #1603428 05/12/06 06:09 PM
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verb, noun, adjective - let's not forget I flunkled freshman English so don't try to confuse me please.

Yes you are right that sooner or later I will need those feelings but I don't know if they will come back. That, above all else, is my single greatest fear and I am not afraid of very many things.

I am up because DD1 just had a nightmare so we were talking about it. I am going back to bed now.

piojitos #1603429 05/12/06 08:46 PM
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Glad you had a good weekend.

Now how about all that homework I gave you?


cc

"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
cc46 #1603430 05/12/06 08:59 PM
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They will come back. It will be up to you to seize them and trade in your hurt for them at that time. That is a decision you will need to make, and you will.

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Last edited by gemela; 05/12/06 09:25 PM.
gemela #1603432 05/12/06 10:15 PM
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Well, earlier in your MB career, you impressed us with your uncanny ability to lead the group out of the cave in total darkness. Now you are afraid of the dark?

Of course, it is faith. What else could it be at this point? Or put differently, would you want to be with no faith at all? How would that feel? It would be over that's for sure. You can end the faith at any time. That's not the goal you are aiming for so why dwell on it?

ToddAC #1603433 05/12/06 10:29 PM
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It was simply an observation - not a complaint.

cc46 #1603434 05/12/06 10:32 PM
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Quote
... you know the lice that are NOT on your head, but now I realize that it ends in an "a" so we can{t use it. What about pendejo?


Name's already taken. That's what gemela calls me thank you very much.

You people have way too much free time.

Last edited by piojitos; 05/12/06 10:32 PM.
piojitos #1603435 05/12/06 10:32 PM
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That's better.

ToddAC #1603436 05/12/06 10:39 PM
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The thing is marriage - whether a continued one with gemela or a new one with Mrs. gemela the 2nd - will never ever be the same for me. My concept of marriage has been destroyed forever. I guess this is gemela's way of telling me there is no Santa Claus. It was certainly nice of her to set me straight and correct my misguided views on the subject. Now that I know marriage is not about two people dedicating their lives to each other and to making a family. Now that I know that marriage is only about staying together as long as you are not bored or until something better comes along, I just need some time to get adjusted to that. I am just trying to adjust to my new found knowledge.

The glue here is my commitment to my vows and the happiness of my DDs. I owe gemela nothing.

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piojitos #1603439 05/13/06 02:20 AM
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am I nuts or does pendejo mean 'pinhead' in Spanish? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

Please enlighten me.

You shouldn't be calling yourself names if this is the case. Or anyone else. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

No name calling! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Love in Christ,
Miss M


me: FBS
H: FWS
Fully recovered
Miss M #1603440 05/13/06 02:23 AM
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Doesn't mean pinhead.

The name was recommended by two MB posters - not me. I had chosen a different one but those two felt this was more appropriate.

piojitos #1603441 05/13/06 02:34 AM
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<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Thank you, bread and garlic. LOL, okay I am done. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

God Bless and keep you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Love in Christ,
Miss M


me: FBS
H: FWS
Fully recovered
Miss M #1603442 05/13/06 07:18 AM
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Garlic bread didn't work for me either. I'll try this but I have to admit I am seriously tempted to go back to head lice.

piojitos #1603443 05/13/06 12:33 PM
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Is this the artist formerly known as traicionado's thread?

Man, am I confused. Fifty different screenames in three days. Whew!

So, you are back to being head lice for good? If not, I need a roadmap to find your thread the next time.

ToddAC #1603444 05/13/06 06:57 PM
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Well I did try your suggestion but it offended Miss M so I tried a euphamism but it just didn't quite fit si here I am. I think it is head lice for awhile. Let's see who takes issue with head lice.

piojitos #1603445 05/14/06 07:02 AM
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T,

I have not posted much because I feel I cannot help you.

You seem to be stuck.

You don't answer any questions. You haven't followed any suggestions, you don't seem to be making any progress, you yourself have said so.

I don't understand what you get out of posting here on MB.

I really believe you have to re-think your situation (personal situation). I have been suggesting this for a while now, but you don't answer.

Anyway, I have nothing to say to help you. There doesn't seem to be anything you need help with.


cc

"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
cc46 #1603446 05/14/06 08:34 PM
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I don't understand what you get out of posting here on MB.


You are absolutely right. I have been thinking about this the past few days. I have read and reread my latest posts. I was shocked by what I had written.

My conclusion is this. I don't believe in MB principles. The purpose of Plan A is NOT to give the WW time to commit to the M. The sole purpose of MB and Plan A is to give the BH time to get used to the whole idea of the A and learn to live with it.

MB goes to such great pains to compare the WW to an addict or an alcoholic. Have you ever heard the expression "former alcoholic"? No. They don't exist. They are called "recovering alcoholics". Once an alcoholic always an alcoholic. Well if you apply that analogy to WW, there is no such thing as a FWW. KiwiJ has crystalized that for me. Whatever circumstances got my WW into her A have broken down a wall. She can step across that line again at any moment. Get the RA too near a drink and the temptation becomes too great.

I truly wish I had never heard of KiwiJ. On the other hand, maybe she has done me a favor in that I can stop hoping that some day gemela will be a FWW because I now know that such an animal does not exist.

I have no idea what I am going to do but I have just been convinced that MB is a pipe dream. Maybe they should eliminate the use of FWW and maybe call them RWW's. At least then MB would be consistent in its analogy.

But you are right. I no longer have any purpose for being here.

piojitos #1603447 05/14/06 08:50 PM
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I think I understand where you are coming from, Piojitos. I feel frustrated as well. I've kind of given up on the MB principles, because it has only gotten me to second or third base of my recovery (actually, since I really have no idea how many bases there are, it's kind of silly to calculate my "percent-complete.").

I can't get past the realization that I don't think I want to meet the EN's of someone who could have the A just because I wasn't beautiful enough to "boink" anymore. Sure, I'll be beautiful again, but why share it with someone who uses the "what have you done for me lately?" principle to guide their actions. Someday, I'll be old and grey, and if the unmet EN was physical beauty, that's an EN I can't meet when I'm 70 and the next 21 year old walks by.

Even if my WH fully embraces the MB principles, I can't get past the nagging thought that he will become "human" and slip up again. WH can be ashamed for having the affair in the first place, but you know the old saying, "Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice...."

Yet, I continue to lurk and post here. I don't know what I'm hoping to get, but I still hope to find it here. Even if you decide not to come here anymore, I hope you are able to find what you need somewhere.


Me:BW, FWH 1DD 1DS
Status: Chronicled in Dr. Suess's "The Zax"
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