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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 3 |
Two-and-a-half weeks ago my husband told me that he was having to go out of town on business around the 3rd of March. He told me he was going one place for his work but I have discovered that he was in a nearby city with a former girlfriend of his. Another friend of ours saw the two of them being lovey-dovey at a restaurant and called to tell me he saw them together. Once he came home I confronted him - yes, angrily - and he admitted that he was with 'K' during the weekend. I - again angrily - told him that I wasn't going to give him a divorce so they could be together. Was I wrong to tell him I wouldn't divorce him? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />
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Joined: May 2001
Posts: 5,449
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Member
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 5,449 |
Emotions are running on high upon discovery. We all said things that perhaps we shouldn`t have.
Did you mean it? Would you really stay in an M where you KNEW your spouse was cheating on you?
I doubt it.
You probally said that because it was the first thing that popped into your mind. No one is going to fault you for that.
Have you called an MC yet? That`s your next step.
BS 42
WS 39
WH ONS 04/97 and EA ???-08/00
D-day for both 08/00
-Life is 10% what you make it...90% how you take it-
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Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,975
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Member
Joined: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,975 |
ais,
Have you read the section on this website regarding the dymanics of an affair. That should help you determine the type of affair your WH is having and give you information that you need to help you determine your next step.
Sorry that you have to be here, but you will get some excellent advice and support here.
In the mean time, please provide more information such as length of marriage, any kids, etc. Is the OW married? Does your WH feel guilty at his actions.
Who
I am the BW,
He is the FWH
D-Day: 12/02/03
Recovered
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 3
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 3 |
We have been married for 12 yrs (this Aug) and have 3 kids (2 girls ages 10 & 7 and 1 boy age 4). 'K' has never been married (as far as I know - maybe divorced) and instead of feeling guilty 'C' (my husband) has not mentioned anything to me. When I looked at our phone bill I was shocked to see the amount of calls on it to K but C simply paid the bill and left it at that.
It's so hard when the betrayal is so fresh. I'm trying to make sure that the kids don't hear us arguing but I know they can sense the tension.
C and I moved away from my hometown shortly after our oldest daughter was born so I have no family - close by - to fall back on. The hardest thing is - I still love him but there are times that I can't stand being in the same state with him much less the same household.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
So, did he give you an explanation of why he lied, and was with this woman?
Read all about Plan A here, and also check out the emotional needs section on the home page.
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