MelodyLane,
Since you closed your original thread, I have posted this here.

I respectfully asked for a reply. The post in question was directed to me and I would honestly like a reply.

Did you not see my reply? Here is the link: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...e=0&fpart=3

OK. You certainly have a choice to not reply.

I believe I did reply: TWICE.

No, I mean to my original questions that I was seeking an answer to. Saying "no thanks" does not answer my questions that I asked you. It only tells me that you do not want to answer my questions. It's OK Mel...you don't need to answer my questions.

I'm glad you think it's "ok." <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

FFS 2BNormal, please just let it go. That was her reply.

2B ...

I only lurk in these parts anymore...but have been reading some of the back and forth ..

Something I learned LONG LONG ago..... and I think you'll "understand" ...where I'm going here...and it may help you "fare" better on this site....

All of the Mods here....are posters ... they post....under DIFFERENT names...than they MOD with.....

Got me?

Take care.

bij, surely you aren't trying to imply that *I* am a mod? That would be very misleading if you are.

I've been trying to figure out what about your comments and questions push my buttons. Everything always seems logical, seems to make some sense, but ends up in circular arguements, in power plays, with you getting that last stab in. I knew I'd had those feelings before. Then it struck me. It's "crazy making" talk. It's the kind of comments, arguments, attacks, that are typical of addicts and alcoholics. It brought back those memories of my exWS before he got into Recovery, and when he was having his affair. It's "Dry Drunk" behaviors!!

I do believe that my sanity is coming back! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

How rude and obnoxious of you to say so. But, I think perhaps it's the LOGIC and REASON that bothers you, because I have noticed that you use a high level of feeling and emotion in your posts, which is the antithesis to a reasoned argument. You value nice, empty words over straightforward truths and "think" with your emotions, rather than reason and logic. That is probably why I find your posts so vacuous. But, it really does take all kinds, doesn't it? What appeals to one person may not appeal to another, huh? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

heartmending, I find it astonishing that a self-professed "counselor" would take a cheap shot about someone's alcoholism just to get in a hateful dig. [21 years sober] That about beats anything I have ever seen on this forum on the vindictive and nasty scale and speaks volumes about the kind of person you are. I find it frightening that you really counsel people.

I do not post very often as you can tell by my number of posts.
But I do read here every day.

I tend to agree with what heartmending said.

Melody Lane, how can you possibly justify your behavior on this now locked thread?
(That YOU started for sfjaj)

You treated 2BNormal similarly but I can't find that
thread; maybe she can post it here since she has a question
for you.

Melody, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM and YOU NEED HELP.

CLICK HERE: Melody's thread to sfjaj

My thread:
Exposing a Past Affair

This was the post I was referring to on the thread:

sillygirl, the one who has a problem here is YOU. I am doing quite fine actually. Appreciate your concern for me, though. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

2BNormal, why not explain what your big issue is with that post? I thought it was a pretty clear overview of the sickening rationalizations I saw on that thread. It seems I have really hit a nerve with you by that comment. So what gives?

MelodyLane,
The BIG issue I have is that you went on an on yesterday how you do not bash but only disagree.

This post I quoted was a direct bash at me and you attacked my character. This kind of treatment will not be tolerated by me. YOU may disagree with what I had to say on my thread, but the treatment you gave me was uncalled for.

You not only attacked my character but also attacked sfjaj's character by your words.

I am only asking you to examine your words as the words you posted to me were not helpful in any way. I asked you to explain how your words were helpful to me, but you refuse to answer my question.

Wow Mel, you sure do inspire some strong feelings!

Melody used to push my buttons -- big time! And do you know why? Because I was a very foggy WS. And its almost impossible to fight her clear logic. Its like shining a spotlight through the fog. And its makes us WS very uncomfortable. No bull****, she just speaks the truth directly and clearly.

However, now that I have regained my sanity -- I always agree with the advice she gives. I have never seen her give advice that is not in line with the MB principles.
She is invaluable to this forum! And I hope some of the people she has helped will speak up about it.

I think what is going on here is a couple of still foggy WS's can't fight the logic, so they want to make it a personal battle instead.

I sure hope a few with 3 digits of posts won't run off someone with 5 DIGITS in their posts! I know Mel's a tough one, so she probably doesn't need me fighting her battles. But if a line is being drawn, I want to be on her side!

Well, the objection to Melody has indeed turned to cheap shots against her.

Melody is forthright and quite blunt, which is often needed by foggy posters. I think the issue that some of y'all are having is that you're afraid she might actually be (gasp!) RIGHT, and you don't want her to be.

It seems to me that some of you are of the opinion that if she agrees with your "advice", she should take it to another thread.

Well, the problem with that idea is this: If she does not step in to point out harmful and/or non-MB advice on the original thread, the poster who is being given the harmful advice may not see the alternative and MB-based advice on another thread.

We can all share opinions and what works for us, but newbies who are not yet recovered giving advice to another newbie is sort of like the blind leading the blind.

Oh, and BTW, withholding the truth about an affair to "protect your spouse" is extremely disrespectful to your spouse. I agree that the OMW or OWH should be told about the affair, so that she/he can protect herself/himself.

How would you feel if you learned that the OMW died of AIDS, due to her spouse continuing to cheat after he finished with you? Especially, when a word from you could have given her the information needed to protect herself.