As many of you know, I'm up in Seattle, trying to help my dad and mom. Dad is 91 and is dying of heart failure/prostate cancer that has spread/kidney failure.

He has been blessed to have many specialists that have given him good care and all of the modern medical advances. Unfortunately, he is still dying.

Dad, mom, and I have spoken to the specialists. They have done lots of tests. In fact, every time dad goes in, they do more tests. The doctors, bless them, have come to realize that nothing more can be done. They seem at a loss.

So I checked around, and called up a home care bunch from one of the local hospitals. WOW - what a change of outlook!!! The first nurse came and spent all day. She took a history, and asked dad hundreds of questions. And she has a PLAN (I know you MBers can relate to that).

She is a young thing, and at first I was was skeptical. But she quickly dispelled my doubts. It turns out that LOTS can be done. We can make simple changes in the home to make it possible for dad to stay instead of going to a nursing home.

There are things that can be done for the ulcers on his legs, for his unsteadiness on his feet, for his itching skin, his lack of appetitite, his inability to sleep. My mom was THRILLED. We are not expecting miracles, or surgery to cure this.

We know that he will die - but he is still living. And that is where my gratitude for nurses come in. They are not going to be the hero surgeon who snatches him back from the grim reaper. They are not going to be the doc who prescribes a miracle medicine. But they ARE going to be beside our family to get us through this and give my dad the best quality of life possible.

I think nurses are underpaid and under appreciated. I just want to let any of you know that you are much more important to families than you will ever realize.

Amen Believer! I love me some nurses!

Thank you!

Susan - I love me some nurses too. Another one came by today with more suggestions. I've heard more stuff from the nurses than from the docs - not bashing the docs, they did what they could.

My Dad died on the Thursday night before Good Friday, so I've been thinking of him this week.

I had been to see him the weekend before. My last words to him were "I love you and I will see you again soon".

I'm glad I had that time with him and I'm sure you are glad to be able to be there with your Dad right now.

Blessings and peace to you and your Dad.

My Dad died two days ago, on Monday afternoon. He was 98, died of congestive heart failure, also had prostate cancer. I took the "red eye" there Friday night and stayed with him until he died. He's lived in Assisted Living since January, in his own apartment. Although he was well medicated, he was fairly lucid until close to the end.

All the staff was wonderful, especially the ones who worked with him directly - the nurses' aides, housekeeping, maintenance staff, and the Hospice nurses who kept him comfortable until the end. I am so grateful to all of them. I'm a nurse myself and was very impressed with their kindness, caring, and support.

I flew home late last night... I've been visiting every 3-4 weeks since January because I knew this was coming. Although I'd already begun grieving, his death, the finality, is overwhelming. My B, SIL, and I already pretty much cleaned out his apartment. My Mom died 10 years ago of breast cancer so now there's no "home" to return to anymore... after one last visit for the memorial service.

Letstry - sorry for your sad loss. It sounds like your dad had a wonderful long life. It must be hard when there is no longer a 'home' to return to. Blessings to you. TT

Thanks, TT.

believer,

I agree.

Not just the nurses, but also the caregivers that do all the housework and cooking and help, as the nurses do.

The people that took care of my Mom, who died this last October, and the people that took care of my Dad, 10 years ago, were so awesome. I am especially thankful to one wonderful Christian gal who took care of my mom, and was there for me, her and my family until the end. She still calls me.

Glad you have some help, and people who care.

Life is good, and your Dad is going to be more comfortable now.

God Bless and keep the nurses and caregivers. There will be a VERY special place for them in heaven. Hospice takes some very special people.

So glad you are there for your dad and mom at this special time, believer.

God Bless,

Love in Christ,
Miss M

Believer

Palliative care is far more important at life's end than curative care IMO.

Good palliative care makes the last drops of life well worth drinking.

A blessing upon you, your folks and the nurses who are helping.