|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Yep, BigK is right.
Sorry, Steph, you're still banned.
Todd is too, for different reasons. One, he's still a married man and is banned from SF with anyone but his WW and two, he certainly doesn't want to go down THAT track with his WW.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
The stand out comedy I have seen is a BBC one called "My Family" It is absolutely hilarious. I have imported all the DVD's - the first few series are the best but our whole family adores it.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853 |
Tell you what Stef - you keep going like you are and you will have SF in spades much sooner than you think. Yeah, I'm irresistable, you all know it. So does WH even if he doesn't want to admit it. Stupid boys. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853 |
Yep, BigK is right.
Sorry, Steph, you're still banned. Damn. You guys are a tough sell. I totally thought I had you convinced.
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Steph, in all seriousness now, you are doing this EXACTLY right, thanks to BigK and the others here.
I just can't stress enough that you just MUSN'T make it easy for him. It he gets just ONE indication that you are willing to let him cake eat he will take that chance.
I don't see him as a lost cause at all and I know that if you keep going the way you are he will see the girl he chose to marry (because he did choose to marry you - he wasn't forced) and she will be a very attractive proposition.
Please don't mess this up now Steph. Your whole future depends on doing this right.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,431
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,431 |
Hi Larousee, Link is to a Yahoo story that describes how to keep love alive in a long-distance reationship. Yahoo Article
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853 |
Steph, in all seriousness now, you are doing this EXACTLY right, thanks to BigK and the others here.
I just can't stress enough that you just MUSN'T make it easy for him. It he gets just ONE indication that you are willing to let him cake eat he will take that chance.
I don't see him as a lost cause at all and I know that if you keep going the way you are he will see the girl he chose to marry (because he did choose to marry you - he wasn't forced) and she will be a very attractive proposition.
Please don't mess this up now Steph. Your whole future depends on doing this right. Thanks Kiwi. I've been joking all night, I know you all know that. I don't intend to undo the work that I've done. I'm going to try not to anyway. I'm just going to be the best me I can be! The good news is, I can tell he's still in love with me (and he doesn't have to say a word, so I'm not listening to him!). Now I need to work on convincing him that the changes I've made are permanent. I know from us talking the other night that he's scared to death of things going back to the way they were before his A and that's why he wants a D. We both have trust issues, just of different kinds.
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Changing the subject completely, DS is playing a gig out of town tonight and I have bought the ingredients to make a Thai curry from scratch. It involves real chillies, lemon grass, lime leaves, a huge number of spices, Thai fish sauce, chicken and a number of other things that I'm looking forward to putting together.
Maybe it's not changing the subject. It's going to be so aromatic and delicious that I have a feeling it's going to be followed by........
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853 |
Maybe it's not changing the subject. It's going to be so aromatic and delicious that I have a feeling it's going to be followed by........ Alright, do you have to rub it in?
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Steph, you can convince him the changes you've made are permanent by making sure they are permanent. Your actions will speak volumes.
What will you do about the stock car racing? I know I would find it hard to show an interest in that and it's obviously a major need of his.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2006
Posts: 853 |
I'm not sure yet about the racing. I know that Dr. Harley said if both spouses don't enjoy the hobby don't do it, but I absolutely do not want him to give it up and I refuse to even broach the subject of it (I'll be served papers the next day!). So, I am going to compromise with him, and go with him more often and learn more about the drivers he likes and whatever he's willing to teach me. And who knows? Maybe I'll find that I do enjoy it....way down the road....
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Good. That's really good.
I can't see me enjoying it in this lifetime but there are things my H loves (guitars) that I don't understand and there are things I love (scrapbooking) that my H doesn't understand.
I think what we've come to do is appreciate that the other person is passionate about it and not to put it down. My H made fun of my scrapbooking to start with but has learned to admire what I'm doing and say I'm good at it. I've learned to appreciate all the different types of guitars and encourage him when he talks about them.
Gardening is something we both do together.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
Baby Steps Stef - the stock-car racing may be on the table in recovery. I really like what I am hearing from you Stef - if you are indeed telling us everything, it sounds overwhelmingly positive to me.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128 |
Alright, do you have to rub it in? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> Oops! I just scrolled back up and now realize we were talking about food instead of SF. Sorry <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
Member
|
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128 |
stph20,
Check into a stock car racing course. You pay money to go take lessons and drive around the course really fast in stock cars. Might make a great couples vacation.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
Er, Pio, we're talking about both.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297 |
BTW, steph, Pio had a great idea there.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
I agree - who would have thought that could happen. Pio and Great thought in the same sentence. Is that an oxymoron?
I bet he would do that with you Stef.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,431
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 2,431 |
I agree - who would have thought that could happen. Pio and Great thought in the same sentence. Is that an oxymoron? Pio and thought is an oxymoron. The word "Great" is superflurous.
|
|
|
|
|
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
Member
|
|
Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
my bad. It's nice to have you back Todd.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
|
|
|
Moderated by Ariel, BerlinMB, Denali, Fordude, IrishGreen, MBeliever, MBSync, McLovin, Mizar, PhoenixMB, Toujours
|
1 members (anchorwatch),
509
guests, and
46
robots. |
|
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|
