Pio,

I'm concerned that she "may" be there for her own selfish reasons. How do you think it would look in a custody case that she had affair with poolboy and then left her 2 daughters half way across the world so she could collect her thoughts? We all know you never leave the house first if you entertain any thoughts of custody. You are also in Saudi, not a very woman or custody friendly country. I don't know if any of their rules would apply to you, but it really does not make her look like a very fit mother. To top things off, you took excellant care of the kiddos while she was off to Mexico.

I would hope for some grovelling or I'd be very suspicous.

S.

Well, BigK is out eating feesh and cheeps (Kiwi joke). Isn't this usually about the time that Todd shows up with his lyrics.

Shattered05,

I think a better way to put that is "if I don't see any remorse, I will be very suspicious". I don't have any hope for anything. I have zero expectations at the moment so I won't get any disappointments. Six weeks of "vacation" was not a Plan B and she knew she would be able to come back. I am a little surprised that she expects to come back and just pretend nothing ever happened. For whatever reason, her presence here hurts me rather than helps me. It is painful to have her in my bed. I am still very disconnected. I am ashamed to say this but she could leave tomorrow and I would never miss her. We have had SF once and I did not enjoy it at all. She has a muscle spasm in her back for the past few days so can barely move. We took her to the doctor yesterday so she is on medication that helps.

It was interesting to hear her describe life at her sister's. They are on an extreme austerity plan. No AC, almost no lights in the house, conserving gasoline, etc. I can't imagine subjecting my DDs to that. I do think gemela is back here because it is the best deal on the table from her POV. Even she knows pool boy is no guarantee.

BTW, I am suspicious. I don't trust her one bit. She has given me no reason to believe that anything is any different. The only thing that has changed is that I don't care any more. She can cheat all she wants and it can't hurt me. It will get her a one-way ticket out (alone) but I will feel relief rather than pain. She has done her worst.

At this point, I just think she does not want to be the one who breaks up the family. She wants me to do it. That's the way I read things.

Do I sound negative? Maybe. I don't really feel much anger though. Yesterday she was working in the kitchen on Halloween decorations and the DDs were drawing bats and I was fixing some broken decorations. DD1 got a call from a friend who wanted them to go play so I took them. When I got back, I went upstairs and took a nap. I didn't want to talk to WW and preferred to be alone. All the way over to friend's house and back, I just felt sad. It doesn't help that I have to drive by their "love shack" on the way.

LSS (long story short), I think I am really screwed up. I'm going to try for IC. There is one American (male) doctor who is supposed to be good. Getting to see him is difficult but I will try.

In the meantime, I am on my best husbandly behavior. You know? I really wish I had studied husbandry in school when I had the chance to take elective courses.

On a positive note, I did get the spare tire mounted on the golf cart yesterday and (pardon me larousse) it really is chingón. I need to upload a photo. I also got me a mosquito fogger (propane driven) and I just can't wait to use it. I got the garage all arranged, I mitered a few things. Except for the fact that WW is here, I had a pretty good weekend.

Pio-

Why do you say you wish you had studied husbandry? That bothers me.

Pio, I knew this would happen. I was dreading it.

You have been so upbeat and happy while she's been away. You were a completely different person. This really annoys me. Or should I say she really p's me off.

I'm with Steph, I don't think you needed to study husbandry, I think she needed to study wifery.

husbandry

Lighten up people - it was a joke. Husbandry is the science of "breeding". You people are waaay too serious for your own good. Husbandry doesn't deal too much with "relationship" issues.

I know what husbandry is.

She still p's me off.

Am I allowed to be upbeat?

I've just been outside watering my early summer garden.

Do you know how beautiful early summer roses are?

OMG, they make me happy.

Everyone should be upbeat. I'm just beat up. But I am trying to reverse my fortune. You guys go ahead without me.

You weren't like this a few days ago.

No we won't go ahead without you. You're coming with us.

My bil teaches agriculture. He says that the term 'scr3w' comes from the rotational action of the (what do you call a male pig - a boar?) 'projection' of the male pig/boar.....whatever......

Just a little rumored trivia from a city girl.

Good grief Cinders.

TMI.

And I always thought it had something to do with "spinners". Canceling my trip to Thailand...

Hello Piojitos,

My H is a lawyer and is well versed in the art of silence and argument, it does not an easy life make.

While I was busy trying to fulfill his emotional needs under a false NC, he was under the impression that I was appeased and sweeping problems under the carpet. He thoroughly enjoyed the false harmony. Because I did not act upset he assumed I was not upset.

For some reason I am reminded of my young son. He had been misbehaving and had been sent to his room until dinner time. Ten minutes later he came out, threw his arms around me, told me he loved me and gave me his endearing smile that can melt hearts. He was fully expecting for all to be forgiven and the grounding to be over and for playtime to begin again. When I said "thank you, I love you too, now back to your room." he was totally shocked and dumbfounded and the smile soon disappeared.

You W and my H remind me of my ten year old son.

My best wishes to you,

Beth

I agree with Kiwi, I want the old Pio back. I wish you weren't so sad. Todd was sad earlier too. What's the deal? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

The deal, Steph, seems to be that Gemela is back and is back in exactly the same way she went away.

Grrrrrrrrr. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Pio,

I thought you meant animal husbandry. Finally, I thought: Pio is on to something positive.

Now I'm getting mad!

WH called me about an hour ago and spent the next 40 minutes on the phone with me for NOTHING!! He called me for no apparent reason!

He started flirting with me and then told me about a problem he was having and I helped him decide how to fix it and we flirted some more and got off the phone.

This makes me mad because it's CONFUSING...I know what's going on but I can't stand it!!! Have I mentioned I'm impatient?? I want him to realize that he still wants me and get over the A already.

I know, I know, it's not going to happen yet, I'm just frustrated because I know what we both want, but he's too...whatever...to admit to it.

But then, I'm kind of glad he called me. It means he didn't call OW and he would have rather talked to me than her and he was thinking about me.

UGH!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Me too. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> I don't like her making you sad/mad/indifferent. It's not the same around here. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

Steph, once he gets his head out of his a** he will be back.

I mean, really, a 35 year old woman with an 8 year old child when he has you.

Just keep being patient, seriously.