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Hi Todd
I have been thinking about you much of the day and saying a quiet prayer for you. I do so admire your spirit. I so wish my H was half the man you are. I know the evening had to be very disappointing as it is human to hope. But, I am so glad for you that your decision has now been made. It is time to pick yourself up and shake yourself off and face the wonderful world that awaits you. Your footsteps will no longer be faltering but placed firmly in front of you. Thanks Beth. I also have to face my sons, especially DS3. Ugh. Oh well, it will get done. Regarding cell phones, my H will also take calls at restaurants etc. in fact I cannot think of anytime he will not answer his cell - it was even beside our bed. Have you ever been in the middle of making love and had your spouse take a call? Yes, that has happened to me. I will not tell you my reaction but I think you can guess. I have a cell phone that is strictly for emergencies with the family. I guess you can understand my probably misplaced dislike of cell phones. My H is a pompous [censored].
The other habit my H has is to imperiously hold up a finger to get you to wait while he takes a call. One day I will bite that damn finger off. No, never while making love but that was one time just after we finished and I thought basking in the afterglow and her phone rings and she jumps up like a jack-in-the-box and ran to get the phone. Very romantic.
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If I see a tall man with a smaller woman & he has on black socks with sandals I'll let you know I've seen your DD & her BF. Or, if I happen to overhear two people speaking funny I'll let you know. LMAO Nams. Thanks.
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I too remember looking at ex thinking, does he REALLY not get it or is he being stubborn. Turns out he didn't get it. Or maybe he did & he just didn't care, on to his new life.
I agree it's very important to share with your boys what you've done to save the M.
Upon the advice of my IC ex & I used we when telling the boys about our separation (road to D in his mind). For a couple of months I kept the we part up until the questions the boys asked could no longer truthfully be answered that way. So, from that point on I told things in the way I felt they happened. My youngest said to me "Why did you lie to us & say you both had decided?". Infuriated ex but I think the picture was much clearer. Hi and Thanks Nams. I have decided that either she is a really good liar or she has some degree of mental illness. And I am being serious. Last night, she again looked at the sores and scabs in my scalp and seemed surprised to see them. She asked what had caused them. I told her I didn't know. Sometimes you just want to be a wallflower and not dance. I will tell my sons the truth. I stayed awake last night thinking about what to tell them. Well, DS3 really. I decided on the truth and let the chips roost where they belong. I keep learning all the lying and posturing she did with the boys behind my back, and while I won't play tit-for-tat, I will ensure that I manage my own press wisely.
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((((((((((((Todd))))))))))))
I'm so sorry your WW is being ignorant about her mess.
How are you doing today? Hi stef, Thank you. I am feeling well today. Big week this week so I am preparing myself for all the stuff. How are you? How did date with WH go? BTW, is it just me or as MB slowed to a crawl?
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Has anyone explained to BigK that February/March is still pretty cold in the USA? Yes but a certain Texan is organising a get together with some friends then.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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MB seems to be running faster today for me Todd. Yesterday was horrible.
Morning all.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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MB still slow today for me.
BigK, is the entire family coming to the States?
Does Orlando mean Disney World?
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Actually Todd - it's slow here as well. Spoke too soon.
Disney World, Kennedy Space Centre, Universal Studios.
Just me and Mrs Kahuna. Kids staying home. 3 weeks alone.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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OP
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is it just me or as MB slowed to a crawl? We are writing slow because we know you read slow. [and yes I realize "slow" is not an adverb but I am trying not to use big words for you]
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is it just me or as MB slowed to a crawl? We are writing slow because we know you read slow. [and yes I realize "slow" is not an adverb but I am trying not to use big words for you] Yeah Pio, And don't think I don't f*cking appreciate it. For I am slow as molasses in Janurary. It's okay. I get my second stupid followup MRI on Thursday and maybe I won't have to not understand anymore. I don't really care. I am wasted anyway.
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Glad to see your optimism shining through Todd.
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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BIgK, give him a break. Even being affectionately funny as I know you're being.
I think Todd's allowed to be human.
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Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Now, now children, simmer down! Todd, I just realized that Thursday is a big day for both of us--it's my 4th wedding anniversary...yay! What a day that's going to be. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I'm glad you're feeling well today. Have you talked to your sons yet? MB has been running slow for me all day today. I thought it was just me. Glad it's not.
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
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Stef - you haven't given us details about your dinner on the weekend with WH. Stop holding out on us girl!!
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Posts: 8,297
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Ok, BigK, truce.
I think Todd has passed out somewhere.
Come on Steph, we're all ears.
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Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Posts: 853
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Oh, sorry, I forgot to mention it...
It went pretty well. It wasn't a glamourous date by any means...it shouldn't even be called a date. We went for fast food...good ole Taco Bell! Conversation was fine, he teased me and we flirted. We did have minor relationship talk. I know I broke my ban, but he started it, not me!
Something was mentioned about our conversation last week about him moving back in. He said he didn't want to because sleeping on the couch would get uncomfortable. I told him he wouldn't have to sleep on the couch. He said he would have to, because if he slept with me in our bed, he would want to cuddle all the time and that would send mixed signals. I told him that I think he already has mixed signals. He said, "what do you mean?". I told him that I didn't think he knew what he wanted. He said I was right, but when he told me he was cheating on me, he expected me to want a divorce and when I said I would take him back, he hadn't prepared himself for that. So I went on to tell him that it wasn't the A that concerned me so much as the reasons why he felt he needed to cheat on me. I told him I don't blame myself for him cheating, it was 100% his doing, but we were both to blame for the problems in our M and doing nothing about it. I told him that I didn't want us to back into the same M we had before, I wanted to start all over in a new M with him and make it better than it was before. He seemed open to it, but didn't say much. That was about all we said.
He did up spending the night again. I asked him as we were falling asleep if he's given any thought to Thursday (our anniversary) and he said "not yet". I said "OK" and left it at that. I don't know what he meant by that, but that's OK.
He's not officially back, but I don't think it'll take too much longer (how's that for positive, BK?).
Sorry to be so long-winded, but you asked for it!
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
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Now that's better! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
BS (me)-26
WH-27
Dday-August 2006
0 kids
Married 4 years
NC established 1-26-07
status-working on it
"Sometimes, I'm afraid and I don't feel that tough...but I'll stand back up."
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
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WOW Stef. Very Good Girl. Excellent. Did you have SF with him?
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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