Hi Lunamare and welcome home.

How did the trip go? How is your dad ? I'm sorry I do not recall what you said was wrong with him but I sure hope he is doing well. Are you exhausted?

Yes, I discovered venting while you were gone. I read my post now and can't believe I said what I did but it sure felt good at the time.

I'm brewing a really good vent at the moment.
I just have to find the right emotional state to post it.

How did your children handle the trip?

Beth

Hello Luna,

Welcome back.

How is your Father?

one of my lowest points came when WS thought I should be glad that at least he was not 'walking out' on me by going to the cornerstore to pick up a pack of cigarettes and never came back....

...and I thought to myself...this is the standard WS is measuring himself against? ...and just for a minute.... I thought the guy who walked out and never came back may actually have been a better option.... rather than have a WS who was trying to JUSTIFY and EXCUSE his choices....and realized that I deserved better than that!
____________________________________________________________

Hi Luna! Nice to have you back! I hope all went well & your father is feeling not in too much pain.

Here's what happened with ex & him just not getting it. Oldest son went to school with a boy whose father shot his mother & her BF while they were in bed seriously injuring the mother & killing the BF. They were divorced. In a discussion with ex about the possible ramifications of D on the boys, he brings up this tragic situation saying son's friend & his siblings are doing fine, ours should be fine too. HUH? I just looked at him & wondered just how far that idjiot head of his was up his [censored].

Hi Todd, I hope Thurs. goes well for you. I know Sandi didn't see any shrinkage in her tumor for a long while yet she did see improvement in her symptoms.

Talking to your DS3 will be horrible. Emotionally the lowest part of the whole D process for me was telling the boys. It brings tears to my eys still when I think of it.

Bigk is visiting "A certain Texan"? OMG! BigK is visiting George W!!! Poor BigK & Mrs. BigK.

Hi stph, if you think the worst, prepare for the worst, you may be pleasantly surprised. If you think the lowest of the low actions your H might be capable of maybe only half will be true.

Hi Nams,

Thank you. I am glad that you said that because I just read a case study wherein the patient's tumor shrunk 80% by the first MRI. I have tried to adopt the attitude that it will take time but I always hold high expectations for myself, even when I don't control the outcome. Overachiever I think they call it...

Hi Pio,

I spent a few hours glazing last night & I'll be glazing more tonight. For the most part I'll be using glazes I know but I'll also be trying out some new ones. The ones I know are not guaranteed to come out but the new ones are a complete crap shoot. If I have a beautifully made piece then end up with a nasty glaze the piece either gets broken or sold for a fraction of what it could have sold for if the glaze worked out. I keep telling myself to find 6 or so reliable glazes that I like & stick to those...but that would be boring so I don't.

Some people are compulsive & will work on perfecting a glaze recipe for months. Not me, I'll give it a try or two then move on to something else if it doesn't work out.

Here's a glaze question for you. Sometimes I'll put glaze on a piece & it cracks into fines little pieces & will flake off. Another potter told me to add Karo syrup to fix that problem. She means well but I don't know...why would this work & would you expect this to have an impact on the outcome?

I fire to about 2500/2600 degrees F for a glaze firing. If you put a 100 watt bulb in your easy bake I'll bet you'll get there just keep the DDs away.

Stef - Don't get hung up on the exit affair thing. Sheesh you worry far too much. He's confused as he11 right now - he thought you would disolve your marriage and didn't. He's re-evaluating, likes spending time with you, rings you for no reason and constantly tries to get his leg over. This is all good Stef.

Hi Todd & Nams,

Nams, I wish I knew your marriage history. You are always so postitive and pleasant you make me feel guilty for not being so. I keep on telling myself that if the ladies on this thread can get through this so well - then so can I.

Todd, I am sure you know that you cannot compare yourself to case studies but I understand you doing so. I think I read way too much and listened to way too many people about my own problem and ended up totally confused. Add in second opinions I was advised to get and it turned into a seething mess in my brain. In the end I stuck with one doctor in each specialty and just listened to them and followed their advise.

Todd, I asked you a few days ago why you would not consider chemotherapy. I guess it is an option for you and you voted against it. Maybe you missed my question on this busy board ? If you just don't wish to reply then feel free to ignore me again. lol

I agree. I have a great team of doctors at this point. The neurologist is a little weird but most of them seem to be, lol. Comes with the territory I suppose.



Beth, I missed it. I have never seen anyone who benefited from chemo. It makes people very ill and then they die. They may be exceptions. Also, the delivery to a brain tumor is reasonably complicated because of a phenomenom called the "brain blood barrier". There are ways around this obviously but my understanding is that chemo is not as effective on brain tumors as other tumor types.

Todd,

I haven't been keeping up with this thread, so forgive me if you've already said something about this doctor or this program. But, have you consulted with Dr. Henry Friedman at Duke? I saw a "60 Minutes" story about him a few years ago and he seemed very open to all sorts of options that mainstream oncologists don't know about or aren't willing to try.

Hi Todd,

Well you have made me laugh, first time today too, so thank you. I had chemo but I refuse to die. Don't feel badly, I am thick skinned and have heard far worse and I did ask you! I am going to be one of your exceptions.

I do want to tell you that I know nothing about brain tumors and their treatment. But mainly I wanted to let you know that chemo. has improved greatly since the old horror stories. I never want to do it again but I am grateful for it. I hated the loss of all my hair and yes I mean all of it including eye brows, female vanity I know. But - it grows back !! Actually I didn't look so bad bald.

Mainly Todd I just wanted to let you know that it is not so bad - honest !

Thanks again for the laugh I seriously still have a smile on my face.

Todd,
Just catching up. Took a loooong time since MB is really slow today. Good Luck on Thursday. Please let us know how you are feeling. I also think your WW is still in denial. It might take a long time but eventually I think everybody can have an awakening (even if only at the end). I see with my WH. He acknowledges only as much as I know (and can prove/ find out) and then denies the rest. He even comments about other people's relationships as if nothing had happened to us. I look at him and wonder...

Pio, I hope G stops hurting you and see the risk she is taking of losing you and her family. You know that eventually you will be OK, find someone you love and really deserves you. But if she misses this opportunitty that you're giving her, giving her background, it will make her life a real mess.

Stef, I read your date story. Congrats. It's tough but you are getting to WH. I went through something similar in the beginning. He was always looking at me surprised that I was still willing to work in the M.

Now, I guess I'm getting tired, less patient (I know Pio). But anything he does/ not do sets me off. Maybe I should take some AD.

Hi you all. It's great to read all your posts.

Hi everyone,

This was sent to me today, I found it a chuckle so I will post it here to compensate for my serious post.

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
creatures?

Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care
of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President.

You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You
can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world
is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom
because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all
the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own
jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If
someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more
than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to
see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original
color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a
pocket knife. You have the freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25
minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Hi Grownup,

I have not consulted with Dr. Friedman. Coincidentally, I did consult with an endocrinologist at Duke a few years ago. I had just been diagnosed with diabetes. Turns out, the hormonal imbalances caused by the tumor caused the diabetes but of course, I did not know it at that time. Since my hormone therapy, my diabetes has gone away. My sugar readings have been in the normal range since the beginning of the year.

Anyway, I had heard about a endocrinologist at Duke and made an appointment to visit her. She graduated first in her Harvard class and was absolutely incredible. I paid for two hours to do nothing but sit down in a conference room and ask her a million question. It cost me a small fortune but was well worth it. Duke Medical Center is incredible.

I did see a couple of neruologists and a radiation oncologist at Emory. I also had some therapy there but the insurance company did not want to pay because Emory is not on their list. I guess their deal was not good enough.

Okay now that's just plain funny. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Do you know anything about Dr. Friedman? He's supposed to be amazing. People come to him after being given up on by their own oncologists and he gives them hope. I'd rather see someone that good BEFORE that point... Anyway, might be worth doing some googling to see if he looks like an option. NC isn't that far away from Atlanta.

Do you actually have a point or are you just stating the obvious? BTW, I take exception to the "garage" comment. In my DREAMS maybe. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Hi Beth,

Well, you know some men have their vanity about them as well. In truth, I would consider chemo but it will take me getting over the hump. I think they like to start it right after radiation but I am not sure. Anyway, depends on Thursday's MRI also.

Thanks and glad I could make you laugh.

Todd,

One thing having cancer taught me was to laugh at any chance you get. At the start of summer my hair was about a half inch long, I wore a wig sometimes but it was also very hot so went without as soon as I could. My middle son came home and told me that some of his school friends thought I was a lesbian because of my short hair. We all had to look for humor lurking in many unusaul places, sometimes it was hard to find though specially for my children.

I will be thinking of you on Thursday and wishing you well but remember not every body works at the same pace.

Love to you Todd and best wishes, Beth

Hi Piojitos,

My H would be in total agreement with you about the garage!
We have a three car garage and can only fit one in there at a pinch.

My personal favorites were the world being your urinal, I've always envied men that ability. Plus the mustache and knowing stuff about tanks. I bet the men on here know stuff about tanks!

How is it going with you wife? How are your girls?

Time to cook dinner. Back later if the boys don't hog the computer all night. Beth