Are you just trying to piss me off now? I've got an "ignore" filter for you too, ya know! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I'm sure it gives WH some level of comfort to still talk to you in a twisted sort of way. If you can't NC, then MC (minimal contact). Definitely set boundaries for your discussions and if he strays, just remind him he is going off limits.

I think in a few months when the house sells, you get transferred, etc that your life will open a new chapter. You are right about us not controlling others. Your WH is WH because of who he is. Gemela is a bit different. All waywards are different even though they say the same dialogue. I think MB is just a great method to get them to turn away from the dark side but it is their choice.

I was thinking about larousse and her charro negro. Wasn't the plumber a cowboy? Or was that a wrestler? Or was Todd the cowboy?

Larousse,

It has been cold and rainy all day today. DD2 woke up this AM scared because there was a noise on her window. She doesn't have much experience with rain so it was a difficult explanation. Era muy tequilero el día. You'll know what I mean.

Earworm of the Day

"Cold as Ice"

Foreigner

You're as cold as ice
You're willing to sacrifice our love

You never take advice
Someday you'll pay the price
I know

I've seen it before
It happens all the time
You're closing the door
You leave the world behind
You're digging for gold
Yet throwing away
A fortune in feelings
But someday you'll pay

You're as cold as ice
You're willing to sacrifice our love
You want Paradise
But someday you'll pay the price
I know

I've seen it before
It happens all the time
You're closing the door
You leave the world behind
You're digging for gold
Yet throwing away
A fortune in feelings
But someday you'll pay

Cold as ice, you know that you are
Cold, cold, as, as, ice, as cold as ice to me
Cold, cold, as, as, ice

I'm going to be singing that song all day now Todd!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Thanks a lot! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Hi stef,

I have been carrying that song in my head for two days. Just wanted to share my "joy", lol.

Hey, wanna get that song out of your head? I have the cure. Just start singing:

This is Major Tom to Ground Control...

That will do it.

Yeah, thanks Todd.

Stph, how are things with you?

When I go back to work, I have decided for certain not to go back to what I was doing. The money is great but the job is very demanding and after my experience last August, I learned a thing or two about happiness. I need a job to keep my mind busy but something with a slower pace. My BIL is a retired senior military officer. He and I had discussed my going back to work and he suggested federal employment. Seems alien for a Libertarian but maybe it's an effective way to earn back all the taxes I have paid them. Anyway, he belongs to a rather large network of current and retired military officers, several of whom hold senior positions in the federal government. He told me to let him know if any job interested me and he will put his contacts to work. He obviously cannot get the job for me, but as he put it, he can get me to the front of the line.

He also knows that I have the ambition of moving to Florida in several years. I hate cold weather. The area of Florida I am interested in is the panhandle Gulf coast. He told me of two jobs that are open and he thought I would be perfect for either one. Both are located on a military base and are involved in advanced weaponry development. Get this: one if a physicist and the other is a mathematician. My first reaction was wow! My second, and more realistic reaction was ugh. So far gone from physics that I would be useless. He said that even if I was not "current" each job has a provision to get certified within 24 months of employment. The physics job is not theoretical physics like strings,quarks, mu-mesons and the like but rather applied to aircraft weapon delivery systems. It would include such goodies as matter, energy, physical space, time, nature of physical measurement and structural particles. He knew that I was in the Air Force and that the job would appeal to me. The mathematician job is mostly calculus and decision science it seems. I took a million decision science courses in college. Okay, half a million. Both jobs are high levels jobs which are management in nature so intense technical "hands-on" knowledge is not required.

To say it is tempting undershoots. Despite what he said, I have concerns about my memory and ability to concentrate especially on something so technical. I have always had the ability to process fairly complex chain calculations in my head. I gave myself a test a few minutes ago. The simplest stuff is okay but more complicated and the processes breaks down. Despite my concerns, I have always felt that I can do any job I put my mind to. My real concern is the geography. I would love to live on the beach and the glorious sunsets over the water, yada yada yada. I don't think now is the right time to relocate. For reference, the location is a 6 hour drive from Atlanta. For DS2 and 3, it is 4.5 hours; for DS1, it is about 3.5 hours, lol. It's a short flight and cheap fares are available.

I am conflicted between staying here for my sons and getting and receiving support during this difficult time or doing what I think is best for myself. I am caught up in my own thinking. Can anyone please help me sort this out?

I say go for it - you're not talking about tomorrow. If you are talking about the near future though, I think you need to be near your sons for now.

Where I live it's very unusual to have your kids nearby. Given our geographical distance from everything, many, many young New Zealanders spend their young adulthood in Australia, England or America.

I wish my son lived a bit further away, not in the next bedroom to ours. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Personally Todd, I think you need to do what is best for yourself. You'll still get support from DS's, just in a different way. And you won't be that far from them. To me, it sounds like a great opportunity.

BUT, when and if WW pulls her head out of her a**, do you think she would be willing to follow you? Or are you going to file for D? I'm just not sure of the timeline we're following.

Just my opinion, I could be wrong.

Hi Jen. Thanks for asking.

I'm not sure how things are with me. Basically waiting for OW to get her other job already so I can fix my M. It should be in January. I can't wait. Until then I'm being pushed into Plan B, but I don't feel it's necessary. WH has established MC (minimal contact). He only talks to her when he absolutely has to, and it's strictly professional. It's not enough, but it'll have to do for now. I believe nothing more is going on between them. Am I naive?

WH is still confused, and that's OK for now, I'm just trying to be the best I can be for him and show him I am what he wants.

Just like everyone else, some days are better than others.

Steph, that all sounds as positive as it can be under the circumstances. You've come a long way in a short time. By that I mean your own personal growth.

(((((((Steph))))))))

Jen,

I don't know the closing dates for these jobs but they will be filled fairly soon, within 60 days. My BIL added that he expects more of these jobs to open in the next few months but either way, the decision is going to be on top of me soon.

Wow, that is soon.

Well then you should go for it. You've put your own life and your own needs on hold for too long.

Todd, again, I agree with Kiwi. You need to do what's right for you.

Hi Kiwi, stph & Todd. Hope all is well.

Todd, interesting!

Just the other day Sandi, my artist friend who had the brain tumor, told me about an opportunity where I could concentrate on pottery. It's a good opportunity but at the wrong point in my life. If my kids were grown I believe I'd jump on it. If I only had to worry about myself I'd take the risk.

You sound so excited about this & you're in a position where you need to find a place to live & want to return to work. Sounds like a great opportunity at the right time.

Hey 2much, sweet picture!

There's a Portuguese club near me that has fish dinners once or twice a year. I've lived here for 11 years & have wanted to go but always miss it. Tonight they're having one & I'M GOING! Two of my buys will like it the oldest won't so he'll stay home.

They get the fish from nearby docks so the fish is fresh. I know I'll feel sick after all the fried food, cuz of course it comes with fries, but I'll live. I might even get some sweet bread to toast & have with butter. How bad is that? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Todd,

Go for it. The weapons industry is no really so hard to grasp. All you have to do is refigure the algorithm:
IF Communist THEN BOOM
to:
IF Al-Qaida THEN BOOM

Small world Todd...I happened to have spent 4 years prior to my current assignment in the very place you are referring. If you need any info let me know. I am quite familiar with the areas between Pensacola and Panama City...Destin is fabulous. If I could retire there I certainly would!

MMMMMmmmmmm, I am jealous...it sounds yummy! I'm sure the grease will be killer but it is a rare occassion I'm guessing that you indulge so what the heck...don't forget the hot sauce!

stef, I agree. Keep up the good work. I believe even the BigK will be proud.