Because I don't want anybody to accuse me of trying to hide behind a different screen name. Some people come on here and try to be different personalities with different screen names. One (or more) person has even done that on this thread. There are some posters who are famous (or infamous). One woman that comes to mind has been man, woman, WS, BS, and multiple permutations of all.

You even have something like "used to be nam" on your sig line. Why did you do that? Probably for the same reason I put that I used to be piojitos in my sig line. But I will change my sig line for you.

H_O,

What is really going on here?

No, no H_O, I'm asking why you consider yourself an [censored].

Maybe this should be in my sig. line, though it does seem unwieldy. I used to be nam until the board went through a re-structuring. After that I was unable to sign on as nam so I simply added an s to join again. I added the s for simplicity & transparency. I don't have a problem with others changing their screen name to suit their current desires but we should be kept up on who they were formerly so we can follow along.

Well nams I'm certainly glad you say that you used to be "nam". I never would have made the connection. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Hi,

My name is pio and today was a good day.

Glad you had a good day Pio

I'm wondering if I should change MY name. Any suggestions?

Yeah, I wanted to be clear for the dimmer bulbs. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

First nams calls me an [censored] and now a dim bulb. Is she having "issues" right now or what? My only problem is I can't argue with her - she's right. I just hate that.

BigK,

To be totally honest, I've never understood BigKahuna. Just sounds like an Hawaiian surfer. [are you a Hawaiian surfer?].

I still have a lot of trigger dreams. Don't know why. I used to wake up really pissed off. Sometimes I would even get into a fight with gemela knowing that the dream was the cause. Night before last I had one of the worst in a while. In the dream, in fact, gemela left with OM. Essentially it was the scenario that I described in my "question". In the dream, gemela left. In my dream, I was totally okay with that. When gemela and I woke up, we were fine.

what's up?....is there a 'name change' bug going around? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

DS11 does not have school tomorrow...have taken the day off work <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />.....and intend to 'hang around' with my beautiful boy...and have NO PLANS...up to DS11 and what HE wants to do! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />....DS11 is just glowing from the attention!

This hit me some how… Even dreamed of being somewhere in the jungle fighting alone… I don’t know what.

Anyway, yes I live near HK.

And still living this inner peace feeling.
I believe we can make it. Either we make it or not I am a stronger person and really learned a lot. I am starting to feel myself again, just stronger and wiser.

H been really great since turning point, specialy with the girls, he’s back to the proud father he was before all this mess.

Of course he still deals with the guilt, three years is a long time. And everytime something goes wrong with the girls he feels really bad… but instead of walking away he’s facing the situations.

I asked H yesterday what he would do if any of the OW would appear to him… he said he would just tell them to go away they had nothing to talk about.

Glad you had a good day.
I am starting, hopefully, a good day.

Bigkahuna - dont change it, love it, fits you just right.

"wax on, wax off" <~~~ Shoichi_Yokoi

I'm not at all sure how to take that - Thanks - I think. LOL

Originally, Kahuna was the Hawaiian title for a priest, expert, teacher, and/or adviser, and the term is still used in that context by native Hawaiians. (See ancient Hawai'i) A kahuna nui was a high priest.

LOL - I am not a Priest though.

Pepperband:
I am not a native english, sorry about my ignorance but I dont know what you mean...

is it good or bad?

line from a movie

The Karate Kid

love dat movie

I must be slow... I still dont get it sorry <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

And yes I saw the movie long ago.

In regard to that movie reference, I'm kind of like Todd and SF - I don't get it either.

Okay YS, back to that post.

The point of my question is to judge your state of mind. Obviously we have no clue what WS would really do. That isn't the issue. What is at issue is that, based on your convoluted answer(s) to the question, you have decided in YOUR mind that the A is really and truly over. You are uncertain about the future and, to an extent, you don't care. I'm totally with you on this.

What I realized way too late is that the A for WW had died long ago. It just died so quietly that I couldn't hear it. Because WW refused to communicate with me about these issues and just assumed I would read her mind, I wasted a lot of effort and likely delayed a chance of recovery for many months.

You made a conscious effort to try to save the M. You have held out this long. You believe the A is(are) finally over. There is no point fighting an A that is dead. So stop. Walk out of that jungle and lay down your weapons.

You are uncertain about the future. Welcome to the club. Whereas you had no input on your WH's affair(s), you do have some say on your future. The battle you should be fighting is the one for recovery. Your enemy is no longer OW. Your enemy is now you. You can walk away from this M at any time. You have that right. You haven't done so yet. Unless you are prepared to fight now to recover your M, you have no chance.

If you have to, sit down with WH and discuss what the problems really are and how to address them. I posted a long time ago about the proper way to eat an elephant. It always works. You may find that WH's guilt interferes with communication. Don't quit. Help him get past this barrier. You are both wounded and hurting. You need to help each other now. You have to trust or, better said, open yourself up to potential hurt. I don't trust gemela any further than I can throw her which is now up to about 2 meters excluding roll (if any). But I have to open up my feelings to her. She can't read my mind either.

WOW Pio.

I thought it fitting that my 3000'th post was on TKO.