IWRA-

You and I had talked in the past about confessing to your H. I'm hoping that your time here on MB has helped you to understand why it's so critical that you do this, NOW.

You've put it off long enough friend...and I'm guessing that it's most likely due to fear. You're afraid of how he's going to react...what's going to happen when he knows the truth of the matter.

You need to understand that holding off will ONLY MAKE IT WORSE.

Read some of the posts here about BS's who have learned of the affair years, even decades later. They're STILL just as betrayed...just as agonized. Often even moreso in one respect...because now they realize that they've been living with a lie for YEARS.

Don't take off from MB without correcting this in your own situation. As I said on the other thread...you're NOT in any form of recovery until you've taken this first step. You're in NC...but your marriage is NOT moving towards recovery until your H is aware of what happened, and you both agree to move forward with recovery. Right now, your H is living in shadows...he can't see the REAL state of your marriage.

You know this...you've learned it here on MB. So now, before you and I leave this site...tell me what your plan is to correct this?

IWRA, I have never posted to you but this post by OWL has compelled me to. My H did not know of my A for about 9 years. It ate me alive. It killed any chance of true intimacy in our M. How could I ever be open with him when I had to protect this HUGE secret? Shortly after I came here about my H's A, I was exposed. Though it temporiarly pushed my H closer to the OW it was like breaking free of my own shackles. There is freedom in truth. I never could have embraced the principles here, never could have really worked hard on my personal growth and on my M if that secret had continued to fester like an open wound.

Try it. It will hurt momentarily but it will also bring you self respect.

Thanks, Owl and Faithful Follower for your encouragement and caring.

I had said on <mkeverydaycnt's thread> that I wouldn't be posting until after I confess to my husband about my email affair.
(But here I am posting but it is because of respect for both of you.)
(I said on this above thread, that I posted 4 times using the ID summersky.)

I promise to think and pray about how to tell my husband. After he knows, I will post, on this thread below of Cardsonly's, since that is where I first started posting.

This thread: <HELP! WITHDRAWING FROM PAINFUL ONLINE AFFAIR>

We had a safe place to post on that thread and Owl helped me IMMENSELY from a BH's perspective. 2BNormal, through personal emailing, gently guided and helped me (my gratitude is more than words can say) to do the right thing and to go NO CONTACT with OM.
THANK YOU 2B (Cards also) for your friendship and encouragement.

It was many months ago that OM & I agreed to no longer be a part of one another's lives and to stop ALL communication.

So until I tell my husband, this really WILL BE my last post. I will not be replying to any posts that may follow this one. (Owl, it was thoughtful of you to start this thread. Don't give up on me doing the the next step to recovery, ok?)

Thanks again to everyone, especially those that posted on the Cardsonly thread.

EVERYONE is valuable and important in their own special way.
(Including those just reading that haven't yet registered.)

IRWA...When you tell your husband, you will get nothing but support here...I am just amazed that you have been here since 3/2005 and have yet to tell him...PLEASE DO THE RIGHT THING AND TELL YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT YOUR AFFAIR...And don't try to minimize it, by saying it was only an email affair-BETRAYAL IS BETRAYAL...You focused much of your energy on OM while in contact...Energy that you stole from your husband...Much of my own affair was by email, because it was long distance...It is just as damaging...

When are you going to tell your husband?

Mrs. W

Well, she has a little more to come clean about and I doubt the story she told us as her IWRA alias is even close to the truth. I hope she comes clean with this board about other aliases that she has used over the years to attack me and/or defend other fogged out WS'. She has been trolling the board for several years under IWRA, SummerSky, SillyGirl04 and BlessedTime. There may even be more.

^^ same quote via both Sarie & IWRA^^


Greetings Sarie/Blessed time ... I guess you just cannot make up your mind whether or not you are willing to commit to telling your HUSBAND about your LONG_TERM affair (what is it now? 12 or 13 years?)

And the OM is now a happily married man? Or does he still sneak around with you behind his new wife's back?

radical honesty is not on your "to do" list I take it?

WAKE UP SARIE .... YOU CANNOT MARRIAGEBUILD WHILE YOU ARE STILL COMMITTED TO YOUR AFAIR AND DISHONEST TO YOUR HUSBAND

I wish you well, I wish you therapy!

Pep <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

OWL

you've been used and abused by this person

just so you know

Pep

You are KIDDING me!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pep, could you please e-mail me at jenny_l789atYahoo.com. (on an unrelated to this thread subject)

Thanks very muchly.

it bounced back to me Jen

It's an L not an I. Try again with Jenny_L789@yahoo.com

2nd try sent

and received

Sarie, why did you change the screen name of SillyGirl04 to SillySillyGirl today?

http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...ge=5&topic=

We all must be vigilant about watching for more reincarnations of this sociopathic individual...She has professed to leave MB MANY times since 2003, and clearly has NOT...I suspect we will be treated to more manufactoring of her brand of high drama and the exploitation of the pain and suffering of others if we aren't very careful...This is truly SICK! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

Mrs. W

I feel very SAD right now.

2B...

I certainly hope that IWRA et al has played no part in your recent decision not to inform OMW...I suspect she may have had an impact there, and that is deeply troubling to me...I said as much to Mr. W when IWRA blew up the JJ situation herein...Yes, 2B, I thought of you then, and I was concerned about how you might be negatively impacted...Please search your soul about that, k? I think that she may have created an "us vs. them" environment for you...Misery loves company, remember? Please don't let someone like that prevent you from doing what your conscience has long been telling you is the right thing...Sounds corny, but "the truth will set you free"...

Best,

Mrs. W

MrsW - IWRA has no part in any decision I make....

She has given me permission to post her TRUTH as she cannot post it write now. She is babysitting her grandchildren and does not have her MB password with her...

The TRUTH TO FOLLOW>>>

She has been a busy girl today. She has changed some of her screen names: SillyGirl04 to SillySillyGirl, SummerSky to Summerskies. She went back and edited her Summersky posts to add "IWRA" to make it appear she wasn't trying to deceive anyone. She edited her post, too, but didn't notice that I had quoted her afterwards.

2BNormal, I am sorry you were deceived. She has been trolling this board for several years. Some of her first posts under Sarie are truly chilling. Under Blessedtime she was downright CRUEL to BobPure in his darkest moments because he criticised his WS for plotting to run off with the OM.

The "truth" according to Sarie/BlessedTime/SillyGirl04/SummerSky/IWRA. This should be very interesting. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

2B, this woman doesn't know the meaning of the word truth.

I think she's a very sad, very lonely, bordering on pyscopathic individual. As Mel says, her posts as Sarie were chilling.

If you feel you want to post what she's written then you should, but please don't get caught up with her any more. I'm so sorry you've been so hurt.