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(((( Caren ))))
I am so very sorry honey.
Dear God, Please send your angels to surround OUR angel, Caren - with love.
Most respectfully, carnation
Me - BS 55
WH/FWH 50
OW 30
Much evidence says that my H was/is
deeply involved in a very long term PA
Prolly will never know much more than that
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Caren,
My prayers will be for especially for you tonight. I am thinking of you Caren. I am so sorry for the tremendous amount of pain that you must be feeling.
Take care of yourself.
Kim
D-Day May 14th, 2005
Married 16 Years
DS age 8
6 months Plan A
Plan B 10-11-05, H moved back in June 2007, Very False Recovery.
2nd Day-Day 7/7/08 Kicked WH Out.
Plan B for my sanity
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
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Caren, I am sorry to hear the news.
I am sure you did all you could to help her. However, no matter how much you love someone, you can't make their choices for them.
Last year, I lost all communication with my sister. I know she is healthy in body and she is successful in the work world. But, she is lost to me because of something neither of us could control.
Both your loss and my loss were the result of choices. There are always consequences.
I will pray for you and for your nieces and your children.
Hopefully, they will grow to understand that she was a sick woman and that drugs can and do kill. Hopefully, they will learn that lesson.
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Caren, I am so very sorry! My prayers are with you and your family.
"Your actions are so loud that I can't hear a word you're saying!"
BW M 44 yrs to still-foggy but now-faithful WH. What/how I post=my biz. Report any perceived violations to the Mods.
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My dear Caren,
My condolences and sympathies to you and your family for the loss of your sister. How sad that one's life has to end due to such bad choices.
As hard as it is for you, please be there for your neices and BIL. Your mother also needs your support and at the very least, may this hard lesson strengthen the good in all of you to help your through this ordeal.
Sending prayers of support from the middle of the big blue.
Hugz,
L.
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Caren,
The Lord is there. "Sometimes He calms the storm...sometimes He calms His child in the storm."
Kimmy is right. This is not yours. But the pain is real. Just know He is in control.
Standing in His PresenceFBS (me) (48) FWW (41) Married April 1993... 4 kids (19(B), 17(G), 14(B), 4(B)) Blessed by God more than I deserve "If Jesus is your co-pilot...you need to change seats!"Link: The Roles of Husbands and Wives
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Caren, I am so sorry for your loss.
It is so hard to lose a sibling.
My step-brother lost his first wife the same way, she was a recovering addict, who fell of the wagon, shot up in the bathroom and died, blocking the door. Her 8 year old son found her.
Very, very sad. And like your sister, she was not a bad person, just a frail human, with an addiction she could not beat.
((Take care Caren))
k.d.'s heartbreak
In the end, I have nothing to lose but everything to gain, by trying to save my marriage.
Me, betrayed wife 46
Former Wandering Husband, 51 E/A 2005
28 years of marriage
DD 26, DS 24
O/W aka, Rat 29, A-D Assisted Living
Discovery 8-20-05 Recovery ongoing.
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Still rooting for you...no matter what.
-TM
BH (Me) 32,
WW 38
no kids
been together 14.5 yrs.
married 9
D-day 12/5/04
D final 11/23/05, she got it all...I just wanted out.
Done with her...selfishness is not a virtue
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(((((Caren)))))
May God grant you His comfort and support during this time of great sorrow. I pray He will also make His presence known to your brother-in-law and your sister's children.
God bless.
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thank you all.......it's just so incredibly hard, as I said before compounded by the fact that I missed so much work, and got a notice from my landlord wanting me out, because I've been unable to pay my rent yet. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> God Bless, -Caren
Always Look For Grace Given, Even in the midst of Grace Denied.
BS-Me 39
WH-37
Together 15 years
Married 12 years
7 kids total, His: SD20, SS18, Twin SS's 16.
Mine: DD22, DD15
Ours: DD12
Affair began Fall 04, Separated Fall 04,2 Failed Plan B attempts, False recovery of sorts Spring 05.......Still pluggin' away.
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Caren,
I've only just noticed this thread.
I am so terribly sorry for your loss.
Hugs to you, your little ones and their cousins.
{{{Caren}}}
Alph.
Me, BS 37
Him, WXH (Noddy) 40
DD13, DD6
Married 14th August 1993
D/Day 2nd April 05
Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28
Divorce final 6th July '06.
Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx
...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
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Caren, I too am only seeing this now. I am so very sorry for your pain. I realize words cannot do much for you but please know there is another one, me, praying for you and your entire extended family.
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Caren,
I am so very sorry for your great loss. Your sister was so lucky to have a sister like you that always loved her - no matter what. Unfortunately, there is nothing you could have done that would have changed the course of her life. May your grieving heart rest assured that you loved your sister and she knew this at the time of her death.
You are in my thoughts and prayers Caren.
S.
Me/BS 48
Married 16 yrs/together 23; 1 child
Dday 4/05; WH "needed space" and left 5/05
WH Filed D papers 6/05 - Divorce final 12/05
WH moved in with OW 11/05; moved out OW 1/06
12/06 His 3rd and strongest attempt at reconcilliation (I believe OW still in picture)
2/07 Affair over, begging me to take him back - it's too late.
WH has tried numerous times to reconcile.
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Thank you all for your responses and prayers, they are appreciated.
I'm just profoundly sad.
I miss her.
I know that she's with God now.....and tat she is in no more in pain.
That gives me some solace.
Life isn't fair......God is fair.
God Bless,
Caren
Always Look For Grace Given, Even in the midst of Grace Denied.
BS-Me 39
WH-37
Together 15 years
Married 12 years
7 kids total, His: SD20, SS18, Twin SS's 16.
Mine: DD22, DD15
Ours: DD12
Affair began Fall 04, Separated Fall 04,2 Failed Plan B attempts, False recovery of sorts Spring 05.......Still pluggin' away.
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{{{Caren}}}
I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine the shock your nieces are going through, and thinking about that makes me very sad. But I am glad they have YOU nearby. Your sister was very fortunate to have a big sister like you who has been supportive and loving throughout.
Milk
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Still having a horrible time dealing with the death of my sister. I think we had more of a parent-child relationship......where I was always trying to steer her in the right direction, or save her.
I can't help but think that I could've done something differently (irrational thoughts), but rationally I know that I can only control myself....I know this ALL TOO WELL!!
But I'm sad, and I have no idea how long this is going to go on.
They have me pretty medicated. I'm on valium, zoloft, trazadone (for my insomnia) and vicodin (which is only used as needed, for my unexplained joint pain -- they did a test, no arthritis).
I'm hoping the zoloft will kick in and I won't be so nervous and edgy all of the time. They started me on 50 mg and they're increasing the daily dose by 50 mg each week until in week 3 I'll be up to 150 mg.
God Bless you all,I hope no one will ever have to live through this kind of pain.
If I didn't have the Lord to turn to I'd be completely off my rocker. I've begun to read the bible.....from the beginning (Genisis) and praying a whole lot......and I know that I'd never be able to get through this without his, he is my strength.
God Gless,
-Caren
Always Look For Grace Given, Even in the midst of Grace Denied.
BS-Me 39
WH-37
Together 15 years
Married 12 years
7 kids total, His: SD20, SS18, Twin SS's 16.
Mine: DD22, DD15
Ours: DD12
Affair began Fall 04, Separated Fall 04,2 Failed Plan B attempts, False recovery of sorts Spring 05.......Still pluggin' away.
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Caren, glad you updated us. Hope the drug prescription lessens with time and acceptance. It was a terrible loss for you and your family. Thinking of you. TT
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They have me pretty medicated. I'm on valium, zoloft, trazadone (for my insomnia) and vicodin (which is only used as needed, for my unexplained joint pain -- they did a test, no arthritis). Caren - are your physcians aware of *all* the medication you are taking? I do medical transcription for a pain management clinic, and the docs there are constantly warning people about the very real danger of combining benzodiazepines (like Valium) with narcotics (like Vicodin) and/or with anti-depressants (like Zoloft). To put it bluntly, this combination can very well cause, as they put it, "oversedation and even death." In fact, they will not write prescriptions for benzodiazepines for ANYONE because the risk factor is so high. They often find out through routine drug testing that their patients are, unknown to the docs, taking things like Valium that they got from a psychiatrist or psychologist or a family practice doctor. The patients never mentioned this to the pain docs who are prescribing the narcotic meds like Vicodin and I can tell you that many of those patients are, frankly, lucky to be alive, since they either did not know of the danger or DID know and just did not want to be taken off the Valium. I hope you can see why your post jumped out at me. Please be very, very careful about this and make sure that ALL your doctors know EVERYTHING you are taking. Mulan
Me, BW
WH cheated in corporate workplace for many years. He moved out and filed in summer 2008.
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