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#1765658 11/04/06 10:49 AM
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GOOD LORD woman !!!

YOU are certainly writing an exciting new chapter in your life

YOU are certainly experiencing a catharsis of the soul

YOU are certainly using your past error to better yourself

YOU are in this crucible with your senses alive

Nothing could make me happier for you

Keep it up !

Pep

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As you may have read my first few posts, I was SO lost in the midst of my fog only He has been able to help me come out of it. I prayed so hard for so long, and kept feeling as if my prayers were not being answered. However, what I realize now is that my prayers were being answered as my baby was growing inside my tummy! Yeap... I couldn't understand why something like this could happen to me, or what it all meant... during the foggiest times I really had convinced myself that this baby (OC) was coming into our lives as a "sign" that OM and I were meant to be together!! HA! what a bunch of C R A P that was in my head.....

Now I see it so clearly, OC came into our lives to bring BH and I closer and for us to truly recover our M or better yet create a NEW M. Only God is able to work such dispair into so much joy! Our DD (almost 5 months old now) is the not OM's answered prayer, is BH's answered prayer... he is the person God chose to raise her regardless of what OM may want. God's perfect plan was never to allow OM and I to destroy my family but for BH to have family the Wife he deserves and the family he worked so hard to keep together.

I kept questioning God in all of this and I do not need to do that anymore. OC was meant to be here and was meant to be raised by BH and I in a loving, secure, good home that only we can provide.

This was all a very hard lesson for me to learn but I am glad I am learning, I am glad I was given a second and third chance! When I read the posts on these boards about the WW who cannot see the light yet, I just say a prayer because I know they cannot do this on their own.... this "affair adiction" is just so strong, if it wasn't for God, perhaps I would still be in my own addiction! How sad...

I hope my story can help others. If there was a couple that did not think they could even begin to work through this, is us!!

B


WW (me) 36 BH 37 Married 16 yrs 3 children, 12DD, 4DD, 7 mths DD (OC) D-day 8/05 2nd D-day 10/05 *OC* 3rd D-day 6/08/06 DD *OC* born ~~ If I had known then what I know now ~~
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Quote:

I couldn't understand why something like this could happen to me




Keep in mind McBecca that none of this just "happened" to you...All of "this" occured due to your CHOICES...God is there to help you through this because he is merciful and loving and you have chosen to bend your knee to Him...I wish nothing but blessings to you and your family...So glad you are here...

Mrs. W


FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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McBecca you are doing great. BUT pay heed to Mrs. Wondering's comments. Nothing happened to you..You chose the wrong path, used bad judgment on many ocassions and by your own admission were selfish, immoral, and entitled.

That said, you are becoming an inspiration to other FWW's on this board and your input is valuable.

God bless you and your family.

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HI Becca.

"you are becoming an inspiration to other FWW's on this board and your input is valuable"


verrrrrry true.

Tony


BH 44
WW 40
2KIDS DD 6, DS 7
MARRIED 13 YRS.
STORY THREAD http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...fpart=1&vc=
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Just last night my husband (who I hurt so deeply in this horrible mess) put his wedding ring back on as a sign of his committment to our marriage.




woooo-hoooooo!!!!!!

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We had agreed that once he would be ready he would let me know. Then over the last few days he agreed to take vacation time over Thanksgiving so we can fly to see my Mom and family in FL (we are in TX)!! I know this is not cheap as we need 5 tickets pretty much last minute but he said he has not taken much time off since DD#3 was born so it was time. So THAT alone was HUGE great news for me as that means he wants to see my family and it felt like the "old days", then out of the blue right before bed last night he handed me his wedding ring (which I had not seen it in the house for months!) and he told me to put it on his finger again as he is certain I am sincere and he is ready for us to put the past in the past (without forgetting the lessons we've learned of course!).

So here we are today.........

B


WW (me) 36 BH 37 Married 16 yrs 3 children, 12DD, 4DD, 7 mths DD (OC) D-day 8/05 2nd D-day 10/05 *OC* 3rd D-day 6/08/06 DD *OC* born ~~ If I had known then what I know now ~~
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I'm so happy for you, Becca.

~ Marsh

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Quote:

OC was meant to be here and was meant to be raised by BH and I in a loving, secure, good home that only we can provide.





McBecca... I am happy for you that things are working out... but this statement rubs me the wrong way. OC was not meant to be there. You were meant to be faithful to your H and not to get pregnant by some other man. Your H may love her with all his heart... but she was conceived during an affair and that is not what was meant to happen.

Quote:

Now I see it so clearly, OC came into our lives to bring BH and I closer and for us to truly recover our M or better yet create a NEW M.




God does not bring sin into your life to bring you closer. You may wind up closer... but remember, this child did not come into your lives to benefit your H in any way. Your New M may indeed be wonderful...but your having an A is in no way a positive... no matter what came from it.

Quote:

Our DD (almost 5 months old now) is the not OM's answered prayer, is BH's answered prayer...




Again, a rub me the wrong way statement... the answer to your H's prayers was for you to get pregnant by another man. I just don't buy it.

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Quote:

but remember, this child did not come into your lives to benefit your H in any way.




Respectfully, I disagree.

From my viewpoint, my OCs are THE ONLY good that came from my husband's adultry. They are here for a reason...and the reason is not only basic biology. They are MY blessings for doing what is right...but they are not my blessings alone. Because, like all blessings, they are better when shared.

Perhaps McBecca and Mr. McB look on their blessings in a way similar to my way of thinking?

You are correct...God does not bring sin into our lives to bring us closer...He does not bring sin into our lives at all...we choose it. But what He does do, He DOES make the best with the choices we make. Whether or not we see what He does or not is up to us.

Much love to the McBs!

- Kimmy


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

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I totally agree with your POV, Deal....

CHILDREN ARE A GIFT FROM GOD...



I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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Quote:

Then over the last few days he agreed to take vacation time over Thanksgiving so we can fly to see my Mom and family in FL




woooo-freaking-hoooo

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Children are a gift.... in this case it was a gift born out of a horrible sin. My entire point here is that no H wishes for his W to become pregnant with another mans baby.... and no man should be happy that is what happened. That is a curse... you along with God can turn it into something positive... Your H may not say so... but in reality, I guarantee you even though he loves that child, he wishes that she was not the result of an adulterous tryst... and that is not what is meant to happen.. it is a result of what happened.
The end does not and never will justify the means.

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Quote:

horrible sin




MEDC...You are REDUNDANT...AGAIN!!! Your sins are just as horrible as any here, as are mine...I'm certain that McBecca is well aware that her situation is NOT the ideal, but that God is helping she and her husband see blessings where others may not...God is very clear in stating that children are GIFTS from Him...

Mrs. W


FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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Mrs. W... I thought we were not speaking.

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All things work together for good to those who love Him.

Even our sins can be used for good, if we repent and trust Him.

If a baby is the result of a rape, can't the victim look at the baby as a blessing? Something GOOD that came from something terrible?

~ Marsh

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Quote:

Mrs. W... I thought we were not speaking.




That's the first I've heard of that MEDC...I've NEVER been on "not speaking" terms with anyone in my life! No joke! I don't have the ability to not speak to people...a curse maybe?

Wish you well...

Mrs. W

Edited to Add...EXCEPT FOR FOM...Obviously

Last edited by MrsWondering; 11/07/06 02:02 PM.

FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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LOL @ you, Mrs. W!

~ Marsh

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well, considering this is the first time I have heard one peep from you after you were rude to me during the previous McBecca discussion, forgive me for the assumption.

And I don't agree that all sin is equal.... I think someone that steals a loaf of bread because he is hungry is a far cry from a murderer...IMHO, all sins are not equal... just as all offenses against another are not equal.

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Quote:

well, considering this is the first time I have heard one peep from you after you were rude to me during the previous McBecca discussion, forgive me for the assumption.

And I don't agree that all sin is equal.... I think someone that steals a loaf of bread because he is hungry is a far cry from a murderer...IMHO, all sins are not equal... just as all offenses against another are not equal.




Well sorry about that dude, just didn't have anything to say before now that's all...Personally I didn't think that I was any more rude to you than you were to me-actually I didn't consider myself rude at all-like yourself, I do NOT tiptoe around what I wish to say...hmmm...Chalk it up to perspective I guess!

As far as all sin not being equal...I don't wish to debate that...All repented sin IS forgiven I think you'll agree...I will say that I'm glad that you nor I are God...

Btw, IME, we're cool...

Mrs. W

P.S. Marsh!


FWW ~ 47 ~ Me
FBH ~ 50 ~ MrWondering
DD ~ 17
Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered

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