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I finally got an appointment with a counsler for this week. It would be the first one. YEAH!!! ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif) He said he would like to see us both for the first session. (I guess for bias purposes)<P>Anyway the question is: I have no way of contacting her to let her know. i have the number of the OM where she is staying, but I have told her that I'll never call her there. Principal I guess. I've tried to get anyone I know that can contact her to tell her to call me with no luck.<P>Should I call or wait to closer to the actual day (Friday) in case she calls me?
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Perhaps if you know where the OM lives you could tape a note to the door? Or maybe to her car??????
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Did she say she would go to counseling with you? Did she say to call her if you got an appt? If so, I would call her. If not, then wait for her to call. If she doesn't, Oh, well. Go alone.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html</A> <BR>
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I'm afraid you got to suck it up this time big guy! I went thru the same thing. I actually started liking to call, so if om answered I could ask to speak to MY wife. <BR>I don't know if it did any good,it didn't seem to effect him, but it made me feel better.
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Sorry if I was vague, I do know where they live, she does not have a car. She did say she would go. She did not say to call. <P>If you've read my posts or even if you haven't, we are still close, we do not hate each other. So she wouldn't mind if I called, I would just feel weird. <P>I would also be her ride to the appt.
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Paul I just had the same problem. Wife asked me to call her at the hotel she was staying at. No-one of that name? I wouldn't ask for Mrs. I still won't call her when I know she's at his office.<P>Ask a friend to call. What about your pastor? You do have the number, but not the intestinal fortitude, me neither. Just leave a message that you need to speak with her for one minute. Personally unless she calls you I doubt she is ready to go to counseling yet. You should still go alone if necessary.
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Paul, I think it's really, really important for you to somehow get a message to her about the appointment, even if it means you have to call her yourself. If OM will try to talk her out of going, I'd wait until closer to Friday to call her. Good Luck, I'm praying she goes. Lisa G.
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Thanks guys, I think she'll go. And I'm not "afraid" to call, it just feels weird calling the OM and saying "May I speak to my wife please" Feels icky just thinking of it. This is where everyone yells...Suck It Up!!!
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Paul, think of anyway you can not to have any contact with the OM. Also, if you are her ride to the Appt that means that you are her ride from the appt. Are you going to drop her off a the OM's?! <BR>Right now you are numbed by this whole experience and and can take just about anything but in the recovery phase, these memories of asking the OM if you could speak to your wife and dropping her off at his place will be there. <BR>For the future recovery phase, get a go between to call her and drive her so that you do not have to suffer more than possible.
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Paul,<P>My advice would be to "Suck it up".
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Paul, go for you. If she is with the OM, that might be a lovebuster. (Illigitimate lovebuster.)<P>
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Paul,<P>I called my H once at the OW's and her son answered. It definitely felt wierd asking her 16 year old son if I could speak to my H - but he didn't seem fazed by it. I can not imagine setting the example for my kids that she is setting for hers.
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Paul--<P>Hmm. She has agreed to go. Time to "suck it up."
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