LS:

Next time he calls:

LET HIM TALK.

It was his turn when the radio call came in.

LET HIM TALK.

He's surrounded by all these little people singing in high pitched voices...
Theres this glowing angel telling him the way home......
But the house nicked the wicked witch, and she is really pi$$ed because he isn't paying any attention to her....

LET HIM TALK.

Thats the first step on the yellow brick road.

Only ask him... "What time is lunch?" "The boys and I are having _______ and your invited"

You have stated your truth to him twice in less than 24 hours.

And he knows it is the truth.

So it is his turn. Let him talk....

I agree with LG..as usual...

You've said enough for now..

HE HEARD YOU...

You are doing GREAT..AS USUAL...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Thanks for telling me I did great. I'm so needy...I know.

So back off...again. I've accepted his apology, I've stated my truth, now moving on....Plan A resumes.

Cookies today? (even though he told me "no more food!") Invite for my homemade pizza tonight? Suggestions? I'm feeling a little dizzy at the moment from all the drama...so some guidance would be useful. "Do this, LS." (the boys and I will be gone for lunch)

Like I said. Needy, I know.

he asked for no more food? missed that.
fine, don't pack or send him anything.... but i see no reason not to invite him over to eat......he did take you up on the hot chocolate the other night.
but, wait to ask him over tonight....see how the convo goes.

i agree...it's his turn to talk.
his turn to validate you.

it's ok to be a little needy.
everything in moderation, ya know.

Instead of cookies, and this is just an idea, maybe one of those "inspirational cards"? Not one about being lovers, but one geared to having integrity, facing life with dignity kind of thing, or "sending an angel your way" kind of card? Even a "thinking of you"..

I remember a very long time ago sending my husband to be, a card that said, "I know you're doing well enough without me, but I could never leave well enough alone". That's probably not ideal in this sitch, but you can usually find just the thing in the inspirational section.

That would show you were listening when he said "no more food". It may be important to show you do hear him, on the things that are negotiable, not the things that you "have to do".

How weird is this! I just opened my work email to catch up. In it was one of those chain things from my best friend. She always sends me these things and I never pass them along. She's rather superstisious, so I'm happy to help her relieve her anxiety at being hit by a bus if she fails to forward these things along.

Anyway, she sent it YESTERDAY and here's what it said:

Forward this message the same day you received it
It may sound ridiculous, but it is right on time
We believe that something is about to happen. Angels exist, only sometimes they haven't got wings and we call them friends; you are one of them
Something wonderful is about to happen to you and your friends.
Tomorrow at 9:12 AM somebody will address you and tell you something you have been waiting to hear.
Please do not break this chain. Send it to at least 7 of your friends.

I thought, that's weird...that's about the time WH called. So I pick up my phone. WH'S CALL CAME AT EXACTLY 9:12.

do-do-do-do (que twilight zone theme)

Anyway that you can leave him a special FOOD TREAT somewhere today...WITHOUT A NOTE...

I'm a little concerned about the food.

Instead of a note or a card, maybe some kind of small gift peace offering?


My husband loves carved, wooden, intricate or unusual boxes for example.

It's a L$B deposit when I gift him with one.

During his A, I go him a small pewter box, when you opened it, it had a little candle inside that could be burnt in the box with the lid open or removed completely.

He loves candles, too.

This was a "just because" type gift, and he acted like he didn't care about it, but in fact it made a big deposit.

Maybe just some kind of thoughtful little thing that sends the message I saw this and know you so well..

i like cards too...
i once sent 1 to my H that read....
you take my breath away......
and oftentimes my panties.

you can wait on that 1 LS......but, i like the idea of a little card if it says the right thing. i know i have really apptreciated them when my H gave them to me.
you did mention you got him a valentines card.....what does it say?

VERY weird about that 9:12 thing!
i opened that same email this morning....and i quickly deleted it.
maybe i should retieve it. weird.

personally, i have concerns about leaving him food....i wonder if RT has been on his case about you trying to win him back w/ your home made cooking! teasing him that Lilsis thinks the way to a mans heart is thru his stomach.... ...laughing about that......planting seeds in his head.

but,
if he eats it while he is THERE, that's a whole other story. that's part of whole package that YOU offer.
she can't give him that.
always offer to give him some leftovers when he is there.

Well something I thought a sneaky rat turd might try was to mention he looks like he's gaining weight.

LS:

About lunch?

Because in the evening, he has other plans. And only disappointment can come of that.

He can have lunch with you and the boys on shift because he can lie his way out of it with RT. "I grabbed something next to the crime scene"

I know, "puke"

But such is the brain of the WH.

Send him the TM. For tommorrow's lunch.

Send him another TM today, since you have other lunch plans, and see if you could drop off some goodies for "him and the guys" on the way to or back from whatever the plans are. Be ready for this.

He needs to see you right now. And if the "guys" see you with him, it reinforces indirectly his obligations to you. And raises his esteem in the eyes of his fellow officers. If LS can forgive, then I can tell WH that he should go home.

However, you can invite him for dinner. Possiblity of being turned down for that is alot higher. For the reasons above.

LET HIM TALK

Because he needs to now.

And you are the only one who can listen.

LG

ah, we think alike.
i guess we come here w/ our own unique biases....LS knows her H best...she should be able to figure out if her "food suprises" right now would score her points or annoy WH.

if lack of SF was his main complaint before the affair,
i worry that WH thinks of LS as too domestic and motherlike..........i worry that he associates her giving him food w/ her domestic side.......i would likehim to see her as sexy and confident.
sure, she can cook and bake and keeps a nice house, but she's so much more than that.
i want him to see that he can have it ALL w/ LS.

FUNNY! This morning when he called I told him I was making buckwheat pancakes...did he want to stop by? I mentioned that the buckwheat is so healthy.

He told me that his typical breakfast is now a protein drink and a granola bar "because he is trying to lose weight."

protein drinks....hmmm.
is RT a gym rat (haha) by any chance?

if so, the whole food thing needs to be dealt w/ carefully....has potential to work in your favor.

Yeah, but you didn't forward it yesterday like you were supposed to ... so I guess ya just have to chalk it up to "coincidence" ... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

signed,
the skeptic

LiSis:


Your H said this:



Not because he is trying to lose weight.

Because he can't have breakfast with DW and DS's.

He used to.

And now he can't.

And he certainly can not go to RT's for breakfast.

So keep making the offer.

One day he will say yes. And then he will stay again. and again. And then he will never leave.

Nudge, Nudge, Nudge....

Nia:

RT is not a gym rat.

But she did want to spend R/C time with WH. And that was the hook...

The rest is 170 pages of riveting suspense.

Actually, I was very surprised to hear him say that about breakfast. He USED to make a habit of going to the coffee shop where RT works and having a bowl of oatmeal....

I thought about making some really good homemade granola and leaving it for him...

Actually, he does look a LITTLE heavier in the face. I wonder if he's given up running? That was always the excuse to get out of the house...he'd go "running" and meet up with RT. Living on his own now he has NO EXCUSE not to go running whenever he feels like it. He was quite lean there for a while...184 at 6'3".

Just caught up with exciting events of the last two days.

{{{{LilSis}}}}}

Tough morning yesterday! But it's a great sign, isn't it?

Isn't this the huge step of WH switching from "withdrawal" to "conflict"???

184 at 6'3?

Yikes! Skellington my man you could use some carbs I'm thinkin'.