Post deleted by 1heartbroken

Doubtful MB will have that effect. Though MB makes complete sense to the BS the waywards think it's silly. There mind is clouded by their addiction to the OW. If you haven't already said so...don't mention MB any longer, nor the fact that you have posted. Your husband will be incapable of clear thinking until the affair is busted up.

First things first...you must, without ANY forewarning, call the OW's Husband and tell him his wife is having an affair with your husband, that you think you want to save your marriage and would like to work with him to bust up the affair. If you forewarn, you forearm such exposure and they will tell OM's H that you are some crazy jealous wife that is blowing their "friendship" out of perspective. So just call him or stop by his house.

Second, shortly thereafter call your husband's parents and expose the same thing to them. Tell them you love their son and only would like the opportunity without the interloper involved to maybe save your family.

Stay calm. No fighting, no yelling, no desparate crying. It will be OK and you will make it no matter how this turns out.

Mr. Wondering

Heartbroken, good to see that you made it over here. Listen to what Mr W has to say as he is one of the powerhouses on this board.
Mr W. would it be a good idea to have her print the Basic Concepts and give them to him without saying where they came from?

Good luck and keep us informed of your progress..

NO

Waywards are no it alls...you can't teach them. He'll go along with things ONLY if it serves his addiction. Disrupt the addiction (with exposure) and see how reasonable he behaves. He won't.

This WH is no doubt conflicted. He JUST got married. 1st hasn't not had the chance to fail as a wife yet. However, in his mind he can't not reconcile the two feelings and the choice between wife and OW. In essence, he can't NOT be with OW right NOW. He sees no other way than divorce even though it will hurt his wife. Disrupt the affair, expose it, make it real and in a short time you can see if he is a man of character and willing to give up the addiction or is lost to it.

These new marriage with no kids situations, IMO, should not involve a protracted MB plan. Plan A for 4 weeks, then boom, Plan B.

1st...READ, READ & READ some more. Fully read through Longhorn's thread at the top of the Just Found Out board "For Newly Betrayed Spouses".

YOU WILL MAKE IT.

Mr. Wondering

In fact, if you want wayward spouse to read something it's best to print it out and leave it laying around the house where they will stumble upon it. Then they read it to figure out what the Betrayed Spouse is reading. Curiosity killed the cat. They very often won't like it nor comment on it; but, it does plant some seeds and can be productive. There is no quick fix once it's gotten this far.

A great document to so print out and leave laying around (that conveniently doesn't mention MB as this should remain your secret support website) is called 31 Reasons to Stop Your Affair. All you have to do is sign up for the email list at http://hope-now.com/ and they will give it to you free of charge. It says the BS shouldn't read it but I did and like it for myself as well...reminded me about my vows and what I was fighting for.

Mr. Wondering