I think the note/snacks idea is a great one Wild. It lets them know you love them and that you are OK. It will put their minds at ease.

He works for a trucking company that transports mostly furniture. Any damaged or refused pieces are sold to the general public. As an employee, he gets a discount and has the option of payments taken out of his check. He's right most of the pieces were bought from his employer through payroll deduction. However, that meant my paycheck was used for rent, groceries, etc. That's how marriage works.

And most of those pieces he gave me as gifts for whatever holiday. It was too much trouble to actually think about what to get me so if he saw something on the "floor" at work, he'd buy it and give it as a birthday/christmas/anniversary/whatever gift. All of these "gifts" are used by the family...that's how furniture works. I never told him to get out of "my" chair or stop using "my" end tables. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

His horse: I do have a bill of sale that was written to him by the previous owner and a hauling permit that shows BS and/or WH as owners.

I was expected to sell his horse because that is what he decided. He didn't want to deal with it so he "gave" her to me. I think I may be able to make him pay for her care and vet bills because he never signed anything over to me. I'm certain the bill of sale was only in his name. He lists all those things he says I attempted to do and then says I neglected her. His story is a little off, but I'm going to let it go. I'll explain to the lawyers/judge what happened if/when that time comes.



That's exactly what he expected. I was supposed to be "fair" because he claimed 3 on his W4 and not enough was taken out of his wages. I was supposed to even this out for him. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> He's used to me making everything easy for him.

Obviously he is! (used to you making things easy for him)

You are so right though, you shouldn't sweat it right now. Let the lawyers and judge handle all of that division of assets caca.

Just received in my inbox:

Mothers

If you send this to just one person, it should make it all the way
around the world by Mother's Day.

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in
their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry
Kool-Aid saying, "It's alright honey, Mommy's here."

Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies
who can't be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their
hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.
For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween
costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see.
And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes. And for the
mothers who lost their baby in that precious 9 months that they will
never get to watch grow on earth but one day will be reunited with in
Heaven!

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on
their refrigerator doors.

And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at
football, baseball or soccer games instead of watching from the warmth
of their cars, so that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?"
they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world,"
and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store
and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice
cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead,
but realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and
explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand) mothers who
wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.
For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year.
And then read it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their
shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who
opted for Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their
daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little
voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own
offspring are at home -- or even away at college - or married.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with
stomachaches assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only
to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please
pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the
words to reach them.

This is for all the step-mothers who raised another woman's child or
children, and gave their time, attention, and love... sometimes totally
unappreciated!

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their
14-year-olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the
mothers of those who did the shooting.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of
their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from
school, safely.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful,
and now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good Mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad
hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a
shirt, all at the same time? Or is it in her heart? Is it the ache you
feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street,
walking to school alone for the very first time? The jolt that takes
you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on
the back of a sleeping baby? The panic, years later, that comes again
at 2 A.M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they
are safe again in your home? Or the need to flee from wherever you are
and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child
dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for
young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep
deprivation... And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all.

For all of us.

Hang in there.

In the end we can only do the best we can.

Tell them every day that we love them.

And pray.

Please pass along to all the Moms in your life. "Home is what catches
you when you fall - and we all fall."

Please pass this to a wonderful mother you know. (I just did.)

Great stuff. I raise my Sippy Cup (filled with margarita) to all the Killer Bee Sistahs and salute what amazing moms you all are!

Fox...I had no idea you were still around. I had a big business deal go down the end of last month and totally missed your name change.

Sorry.

Mr. Wondering

p.s. - excited I've got something to read this weekend

mmmmm, Margarita. I haven't had one of those in a while. Good summertime drink for us north easters...

Who am I kidding, it's a good drink for all seasons. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Also, I'm completely weened from the meds, so I don't freak out about having a couple now and then...

Oh Yeah,

A hot summer evening, a margarita, and Santana's Abraxas CD blaring Black Magic Woman, Gypsy Queen, and Oye Como Va.

Well, my weekend went really well until it was time to pick up DDs from WH. I went to an incredible cabin on the Smith River. Went hiking and took some incredible pictures of the scenery. Saw 300 head of elk, many deer, and even a woodchuck.

Then.....I went to WalMart at 6 this evening expecting WH to meet me there with DDs for the trade. He didn't show. I called DD13 to see if they were on their way and she said no, they weren't. She didn't think they were coming, WH hadn't said anything to her about getting their stuff ready and they were in the middle of putting the top back on the jeep. I asked her to let me talk to dad.

WH got on the line and I asked him if he was planning on returning the girls tonight. He said no, he didn't have to have them back until Monday at 6pm. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> He said that is what both the lawyers told him when they were in the room with him at mediation. I KNOW this is not the truth, I would never have agreed to that and my lawyer knows it. I refuse to agree to WH having DDs on school nights and I told WH so. He said it is not a school night, it is the weekend and the weekend isn't over until Monday. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I really wanted to go over there and just take DDs. But I didn't.....that would not be good for DDs. I talked to DDs and made sure they were okay. They were a bit confused because they thought they were coming home tonight. I explained what was going on and told them not to worry, I would get it all figured out tomorrow.

I have my lawyers cell phone number so I called that and left a message. It seems like WH is going to get away with this [email]cr@p.[/email] WH kept insisting on the phone that the plan was for him to have them until Monday evening, I said that was wrong and he said that was too bad, he had them and wouldn't be bringing them back until Monday. I am afraid that when this gets to court that he'll have the excuse of just saying "oh, well, that was a misunderstanding" because nothing is in writing.

Now I'm trying to figure out just what I can do about it. Legally, he can do that. Legally, he could come them until a judge determines custody. There isn't anything I can do. I've considered getting them out of school a little bit early tomorrow so I have them. Tomorrow was supposed to be one of WH evenings and he would have them until 8pm under the new mediated agreement. But tonight he said the agreement was that he would return them at 6 tomorrow. He's so screwed up.

On a side note, DD13 says WH and MOW had a screaming fight today. Before I talked to him about returning DDs. But "they" (MOW) bought a new bbq grill today. Not sure which came first, the grill or the fight.

I'm considering calling off all visitation until an agreement is signed between WH and I. I thought this would have happened at mediation. We both came away from that fuzzy. I told my lawyer in the message that this has to get written down and signed by us and the lawyers. That way I have something to go back on when he pulls this chit.

I'm sure he's sitting over there all smug because he "won" again. He'll be the biggest loser in this, his DDs know this was not the plan and he is being a jerk about it. DD13 and I had plans to go riding after he dropped them off tonight. He ruined that and I'm sure DD13 was not happy about. All they did at his house today was sit around and then go to Home Depot for the grill. Exciting life in paradise.

I took a ton of pictures this weekend and will share with DDs when they get home. I can't wait to take them there. Heaven on Earth. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Glad you had a good weekend, Fox. Glad WH and OW are fighting. Glad the girls know what is really going on. Glad you know who the real loser is.

Glad you are doing well.

(((Fox)))

"Exxxxxcellent" - Monty Burns


Oh by the way, DD19 and I went to the Denver Zoo Saturday and I noticed they have some room in the primate area for Babs.

Thanks, sdguy. Hope your weekend was good too.

The fun just keeps on coming. While I was gone this weekend, I had my sister taking care of the dogs at my house. They were out during the day but she put them in the house at night.

I got a call this morning from the landlord telling me I needed to get rid of them. They barked all weekend. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

I can't imagine they barked ALL weekend. On occassion maybe, if things were moving around. We have them outside alot while we are home and they do not constantly bark. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> So.....more things to be taken from DDs.

I'm looking for another place but I doubt I can find one very quickly. AARGH!

Received an email from my lawyer yesterday (prior to my cell message to him) telling me that child support does not include camps/activities, etc. I am to keep track of those things and we'll get them taken care of through the judge. He also said to get an average costs for the horses and we'll add that into child support too.

He said not to allow WH into the house for possessions, just to put what I agree to giving up at this time in the garage as I had planned.

Hey, chrisner.



<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Hope there is room for WH. They are going to be together "forever"

My lawyer called just a little bit ago to discuss WH not returning DDs last night. He was irritated by WH saying that both lawyers told him at mediation that he didn't have to have DDs back until Monday at 8. He KNOWS he didn't not say that. He has his notes and is fully aware that I would not have agreed to that.

He is calling WH lawyer. This is so irritating. We've finally figured out a schedule and WH screws it all up. I've talked to my lawyer about getting the mediation agremeent in writing. There has to be some recourse when WH pulls this.

My lawyer is supposed to call me right after he talks to WH lawyer.

Your STBX is gonna hate life after everything is finalized and he's hit with back support, current, and a visitation schedule that he can't jack around with.

I still don't understand why he's so angry with YOU. Maybe it's easier than facing his guilt?

He is going to hate it, fmailycomesfirst. But I'm sure it will be all my fault. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I truly believe it is easier for him to hate me then to look at himself and realize that he has done this.

I went to lunch with my mom today. I can't tell you where she works but.......WH employer just laid off 40 people, as of Friday. My little sister drove by RBB/WH house and RBB jeep was there just a little while ago. She almost never is home during the day...she works through her lunch so she can get off early. Hmmmm....is it too much to hope for?

It'd be nice if they BOTH got laid off. WH would still have enough from Unemployment to pay his child support and he would get to spend oodles of time with RBB.

But I dunno....with just buying that grill, etc, maybe they weren't a part of the lay offs....yet.

Mr. W,

So glad you were able to find me again. I thought maybe I frustrated you with my Plan B struggles. I'm still struggling but in a much better place now.

Glad I could give you something to read. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Fox

Wayzilla to a tee. DD19 had breakfast with her on Sunday and came home livid. All the same crap about it being my fault and her friends fault and blah, blah, blah. She still has never appologized to DD19 for anything. Just gives excuses and rationalizations.


Now this would be interesting. Unemployment = MAJOR STRESS

Exxxxxxcellent!

I sooooo hope WH and/or RBB are part of the lay off. They probably aren't because they are both managers but lets keep our fingers crossed. That would be a crushing blow to the fantasy.

Even if neither got laid off, they will have to pick up the slack for those that did. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

WH department runs on a skeleton crew anyway, it'll be even worse now.

Talked to DDs after school. WH had picked them up and instead of going to his house like they usually do, they were on their way back to his office. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> Think he's planning on putting DDs to work?

That wayward spirit just boils over in him, doesn't it. Geez, he must be filled with guilt to the rims and it is bubbling over. He just keeps adding to it, too. Der dee der!

Sounds like you had a lovely weekend, yourself, so that's good!

Make that lawyer earn his duckets! Good work, fox, good work!