I was going to suggest you not say anything about the garage either, like you said, in the spirit of plan B. Let Babs be the nag about messes!

Yep...not even a peep about the mess in the garage.

Dark, dark, dark!

--SuperDarkGuy

I was right...DD13 competition canceled for tomorrow night. WH next "fox fix" will be next Wednesday.

I took pics of the garage before and after WH was there. I'll let the judge/lawyer handle it. It isn't necessary for it to be taken care of right now, just was initially irritating.

Thanks for the nudges (sharp elbows) reminding me to keep it dark. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

so did he attempt to take the snowmobile?

The things that I bagged up and put in the garage LAST YEAR, are still in bags, out in the garage.

Midnight, no moonlight, dark, the way to go, the way to be...

I wouldn't even go to the lawyers about it unless you have to. Just ignore the stuff for a while.

Use it as a visual cue. Every time you see it let it remind you of how dark a Plan B you're going to have. ("If I wasn't so good at my plan B--if I weren't such a strong, intelligent woman--that stuff might actually bother me.")

I think she's planning on having it for their court date regarding the D. You never know what he plans to accuse her of in court... it's good to have, just in case.

I was thinking about the fact OW is burning thru her savings. Things WILL get hairy when they are flat broke.

KaylaAndy: nope, didn't try to take the snowmobile. I think he will be planning on fighting for that. Truth be told, I don't want it. He bought it for me as a Christmas gift after he had asked if we could buy it a few months before and I told him we shouldn't now, we didn't have enough money and we would be short for other things.

Then I received it for Christmas. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> And guess who rode it the most? It wasn't me.

So it's a sore spot. I'd like to keep it just to make a point and then sell it. There are a couple people who are interested. It's old ('80s) and doesn't even start right now. The track is fairly new so that alone has value. My little sister's boyfriend is pretty handy and has his own snowmobiles that he uses ALOT. He's helped me quite a bit and I would consider just giving it to him. We'll see how that one gets settled out.

Silent: You're absolutely right. It isn't really a HUGE mess. But enough, I think he was making a point.

SuperDarkGuy: I won't go to the lawyers with it yet. Just hang on to the pictures and then use it if I have to. I've let it mostly go...I'll put it off to the side and just let it be. Unless I move..and then I'll have to do something. But I don't plan on moving until the D is final.



A little reverse psychology, sdguy? Ah, well, it works. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Thanks for all the input. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Just received an email from WH. (I had forwarded an email yesterday to him from a lady that runs DD13's competition stating it was canceled for today, non were my words, just straight forwarded hers to him.

This is what I received this morning:



I don't know why he sent this now. The demo derby isn't until July 29. You can't buy tickets until the week before...and he usually buys them the day of the event. I bought them last year, doing Plan A even though I was not aware of an A. All 4 of us went, and he completely ignored me the whole time, acted like I was not even there. He went to get something to eat for himself and DDs. Nothing for me, not even an offer. I did not exist that day. DDs felt HORRIBLE and told me so later.

What do you all think? According to our current schedule it would be "my" day. But our current schedule may be changed once the judge gets ahold of it.

My thought is not to respond at all. He doesn't NEED an answer right now. Maybe he was just bringing it up now because he knows (should know) it was hurtful and he is poking at me. It's odd for him to plan this far out in the future.

Yep!

Oops, sorry, familycomesfirst. I was writing my post when you posted.

You're right, that is what I was planning on using it for. But I've also been resisting the urge to gather it all up and dump it in his driveway.

Bab's is not used to being flat broke and struggling paycheck to paycheck. That is going to be a HUGE awakening to her. Should happen fairly soon..she's doing an awful lot of spending and nothing noticeable coming from it.

I wonder if all of WH wanting DDs for waaaay future events and calling them so much isn't a reflection of trouble with Bab's. DDs are all he's going to have for family. His mother is elderly and of ill health and his sister thinks pretty poorly of him (nothing new, always has). His DDs are it...and they are going to grow up and have their own lives. They won't want to spend every other weekend and evenings during the week and 5 phone calls per day with him.

My only concern with not responding is that he will try to use it in court that he asked for DDs and I wouldn't even respond. Thus, not "co-parenting".

I supposed I'll just state what I said above about custody arrangements possibly getting changed by the judge and that it wasn't a necessity for WH to know now as you couldn't even get tickets yet, etc.

Hey Fox-

Don't forget less is more.
Just a quickie reply that you will have to see where things stand after the final D hearing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Good job by the way!

MB

This would be perfect. Polite but as few as words as possible.

"I supposed I'll just state what I said above about custody arrangements possibly getting changed by the judge and that it wasn't a necessity for WH to know now as you couldn't even get tickets yet, etc."

Great idea, keep it simple and to the point.

I'm almost thinking the answer is "no". I didn't get to take DDs to the parade this year like I always have. He'll get this day next year.

I won't say "no" now, though. And if I give him a quickie response saying we'll have to see where things stand, he will take it as a "no".

It's been a hard lesson to learn but I don't have to respond every time he wants something. My initial reaction is to be polite and let him know we'll have to wait. Because it feels rude to not reply. But if I don't respond, he'll figure out he will have to wait.

I think I'll say nothing. I feel like it's a probe and if I respond, he'll get something from me.

And what if Bab's goes? It should technically be "my" day and I will not give them up to spend MORE time with WH and Bab's. If he wouldn't have been such a jerk about the parade, maybe I would have traded him. I think for a while we just need to stick with whatever custody arrangements are determined through court. No trading back and forth, at least for a while. Once Bab's is out of the picture, that could change.

Agreed.

While I was at lunch I thought about this more and you are right, don't respond.

What is it with WS's wanting to push buttons in regards to visitation and holidays? You see it with your sitch, lilsis's and bugs, to name a few. It seems to be something they know they can get under your skin with.

Hey Wild! I hope you had a good Memorial Day weekend. I hadn't seen you post in a while, just checking on you!

[quoteAnd what if Bab's goes? It should technically be "my" day and I will not give them up to spend MORE time with WH and Bab's. If he wouldn't have been such a jerk about the parade, maybe I would have traded him. I think for a while we just need to stick with whatever custody arrangements are determined through court. No trading back and forth, at least for a while. Once Bab's is out of the picture, that could change.
] [/quote]

You are darn right WH. I have had this issue with my Ex WW a few times now since the final D hearing and me being awarded sole custody of our 2 year old son. NO WAY IN HADES is she going to get extra time, MY TIME, to go and have our son around the very POS, intruder that help destroy his marriage and I don't care if it is like now simply a continuing adulterous affair or if she marries the loser. Doesn't change anything on my end. That loser POS will never be more than an intruder, a thief to my son and as soon as he is old enough to really understand (assuming she is still with loser and one of them hasn't cheated already) he will be told the truth about who that lunatic is.

We don't argue about this anymore. My time, my rules (and thereby court rules) or no extra time.

Good morning, FCF. Hope you had a great weekend. I had a really good weekend. Missed DDS, but ketp myself busy.

I haven't posted much since everything has been fairly quiet. The last thing to report was the email from WH asking about a date in July that he wanted DDs. It should be my weekend and I've made plans. I bought my little sister a float trip for graduation and that is the day that it is scheduled. I have not told him so yet. I didn't respond to that email at all and WH made a comment to DDs that he had asked me if he could take them and I was ignoring him.

I had told DDs that he had asked and that I would not be responding until custody was settled.

Much more to tell since WH can't seem to go too many days without drama. I didn't know it until after I picked up DDs last night, but WH was going to keep DDs last night. DD13 stood her ground and told him they needed to be home. DD12 agreed. He was ANGRY! But DD13 stood her ground and insisted.

Will post the whole story later....I've let things go at work for quite a few months, just couldn't get the motivation. I'm at a much better spot now and I'm ready to get back to it. Thank goodness my employer has been so understanding!